


Credence Jones's Diary

by Ponyonewt



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Humor, Bridget Jones's Diary References, Credence has some trouble to eat properly, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Everybody Lives, Everyone Needs A Hug, Falling In Love, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Humor, It is an adaptation of the first Bridget Jones movie, Light Angst, Love, M/M, Perceval is tactless
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:54:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 58,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27232330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ponyonewt/pseuds/Ponyonewt
Summary: Bridget Jones AUCredence Jones, single, 25 years old, has two ambitions in life: to gain self-confidence and to live his life peacefully in New York. While his mother continues to give him useless and desperate advice and seems determined to see him form a couple with the hateful and boring Percival Graves, Credence falls under the spell of his boss Gellert Grindelwald. But appearances are sometimes deceiving and life is full of surprises. Perhaps this new year promises to be more eventful than it seems.This is a free adaptation of Bridget Jones' first film ^^
Relationships: Credence Barebone/Gellert Grindelwald, Credence Barebone/Original Percival Graves, Queenie Goldstein/Jacob Kowalski, Tina Goldstein/Newt Scamander
Comments: 32
Kudos: 23





	1. Turkey curry and other inconveniences...

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, Second fanfiction in English and second fanfiction about the Gradence couple. I hope it won't be too horrible ^^ Kisses !

It all began in his 25th birthday year, on a winter's day that was apparently nothing out of the ordinary. Credence had always made a point of never missing any of the Christmas parties that Mr and Mrs Jones, his adoptive parents, organized. He pulled up the collar of his coat and dragged his suitcase as best he could to the front door, his hands and face frozen by the snow and icy wind. He did not need to ring the bell, because the door opened as soon as he set foot on the first step of the porch. Without even a greeting, Tina announced to him in a panicked voice:

"Credence, your mother has just found you a new suitor! "

A long sigh passed his lips. Did he really have to drive two hours to hear such a thing? After a quick kiss on his cheek, his childhood friend rushed to grab his suitcase and invite him in. Every year it was exactly the same story. Henrietta Jones spent months looking for thirty-somethings, each more grotesque than the one before, but each with a certain income and an obvious interest in men. And every year, Credence felt obliged to make conversation with them before running away thanks to the help of the Goldstein sisters: Tina and Queenie. It was almost a miracle that after five years Henrietta was still able to find suitable singles among her friends' children.

He loved Mr and Mrs Jones with all his heart, they were generous, happy, tender and caring people. They had adopted Credence when he was 8 years old and took care of him in the best possible way. They were a couple in their sixties now, always smiling, fond of buffets and garden parties, with a standard of living well above average. But despite all the love he had for them, he found it increasingly difficult to bear the fact that his mother wanted to see him get married and that, in his exemplary calm, his father never said anything to prevent his wife from finding the first rich fool who came along.

In the lobby, Tina put his suitcase at the bottom of the stairs and helped him to take off his coat before saying :

"I tried to convince her not to do it this year, but you know how she is! And all my mother did was encourage her! "

"I know," he sighed. "I just hope this one doesn't collect beetles like the one last year. "

Tina laughed softly and Credence couldn't hold back another sigh. This weekend was going to be very long. Luckily Tina had been able to leave New York to come to this buffet, at least they could support each other. Mrs. Goldstein also had wedding plans for her daughters. Plans that Queenie had been running away from by secretly getting engaged to a young British baker the year before. Mary Godstein's only reaction to this choice was to look for the perfect suitor for Tina. In other words, Credence and Tina were in the same boat. And it was a rather annoying boat from which they would have liked to escape.

"Oh my darling, you're here! " Henrietta exclaimed.

She walked across the hall to take him in her arms, hugging him tightly before dropping a loud kiss on his cheek. Then she moved back to look at him and made a slight grimace.

"Are you going to stay dressed like that? " she asked.

"Er... Yes. " he confessed.

"Oh no, Credence, it's Christmas! You can't stay dressed all in black like at a funeral! I've prepared a lovely suit for you on your bed, so all you have to do is change. "

Credence looked down on his clothes. What was wrong with wearing jeans and a black jumper? But he knew that his mother wouldn't change her mind and that he would certainly look like a Christmas tree to please her. Henrietta put another kiss on his cheek before walking away. But before entering the large living room, she added with a smirk on her face:

"By the way, the Graves are here with their son, Percival. "

Ah, we were at that fateful moment... Credence forced himself to display a cheerful expression which must certainly have looked like a cry for help judging by Tina's snickering beside him.

"You remember Percival, don't you? You used to go and play in his garden all the time! " Henrietta explained to him. "He's a great lawyer, he earns very well and he's attracted to both boys and girls, like you. "

My God, that sentence made him uncomfortable. He felt like a freak. And he didn't feel the strength to explain to her that he was not at all interested in women. Henrietta had accepted and integrated that he was attracted to men, and that was a good enough thing already. At least she didn't introduce him to young women, it would have been even more difficult and embarrassing. Credence cleared his throat, his cheeks red, before answering in an insecure voice:

"No, I don't remember Percival, or his garden for that matter... "

"He almost got married once, when he was living in Europe, but it didn't work out. It ended very badly. "

Perfect, he would know all the details of the love life of a complete stranger with whom he had apparently run in the grass. It was going to be a very, very, very long weekend. Henrietta waved her hand before telling him to go change and disappear into the other room. Tina gave him a compassionate pout before telling him that she would be waiting for him near the bar.

Credence went upstairs. On his bed was a red suit that he immediately thought ridiculous. After a moment of questioning, he finally put on the scarlet shirt, but kept his jeans on because the trousers were far too wide for him. Henrietta would try to make him eat half of the turkey curry again when she would see his waist size. He tucked the shirt into his trousers and after a long sigh he decided to put on the oversized jacket. He quickly combed his hair before tying it into a loose bun. Then he went downstairs to join the festivities. Great, he felt like he was dressed as a carpet... Knowing that his parents would not hold it against him, since his father must have been smoking his cigar at that hour, Credence lit a cigarette before entering the main salon.

"Ah, there's our favorite Credence! "

The young man turned around to discover the crumpled face of Monsieur Lucas, who didn't hesitate to look at his ass as if it were a piece of meat. A shiver of disgust ran up his spine, almost making him nauseous. All things considered; the too wide trousers would perhaps have been better than his skinny jeans... But polite as usual, Credence just smiled and answered:

"Hello Mr. Lucas! "

And as every time he saw him, the old man couldn't help asking him with a perverse smile:

"So, how are the loves? "

 _Help, someone save me ..._ thought Credence. He swallowed with difficulty before displaying a tense smile and saying :

"Very well, thank you. "

"Still no boyfriend? At this rate you're going to end up an old maid! "

Ok, it was time for him to run off to meet Tina and drink the whole punch bowl.

"Stop asking inappropriate questions, Frederik! "

Credence was more than happy to see his father intervene. Mr. Jones put his arm around his shoulders, putting a tender kiss on the top of his head. Mr. Lucas walked away, much to the young man's delight. Why Henrietta continued to invite this individual was a mystery...

"So Credence, how are you? Are you surviving so far? I see your mother has found a rather obvious way to spot you among the guests! " his father laughed gently.

"Oh, it's a real torture! " he joked, smoking briefly to relax a little.

"Don't tell me about it... And this is just the beginning, apparently, she managed to get you a human rights lawyer. A scornful, taciturn fool. A real marvel. "

"Great... And where is this charming suitor? "

"Over there, near the double door. "

Credence looked in the direction his father indicated. And quite honestly, he expected a plump thirty-year-old in a grotesque costume. But even from behind, Percival Grave looked far above all the men his mother had tried to introduce him to. He stood up straight, elegantly looking, and had perfectly shaped shoulders… and buttocks. All that remained was to discover his face. Perhaps he wasn't even as pretentious and boring as his father described him. Maybe he was just a little shy and uncomfortable talking to strangers.

His thoughts were interrupted when his mother appeared at his side.

"Come with me, my darling, I want you to meet Percival! " she exclaimed.

She gave him a glass of white wine rather suddenly before leading him towards the famous Percival Graves.

"Good luck! " his father smiled at him.

Credence took a deep breath to give himself some composure before taking a sip of wine. His mother stopped just behind the lawyer before calling him. Maybe Credence was going to be conquered, maybe he was the mysterious man who was going to color his life, maybe he was the one he hadn't expected. Percival turned around, and Credence felt his heart miss a beat when he saw his face.

He was incredibly beautiful. He must have been about thirty years old, he was about ten years older than him at the most. Dark eyes, a perfect nose, thin lips, a square jaw, a fledgling beard, brown hair with a tousled look, slightly tanned skin, as if he had just returned from a trip. Then Credence's eyes settled on his jumper, and the perfect image flew out. He was wearing a jersey with the ugliest deer head the young man had ever seen. Maybe not the perfect man after all...

"Percival, do you remember Credence? He was the little boy who spent all his time running after you half-naked. "

Credence felt himself blushing to the roots of his hair. How could Henrietta make him look so ridiculous when he hadn't yet uttered a single word? Percival kept a neutral, almost cold expression as he replied in a deep voice:

"No, I'm afraid I've forgotten... "

Credence didn't know where to put himself and he looked around him, hoping to see Tina appear to help him. But she didn't. His childhood friend seemed to be immersed in a fascinating conversation with a red-haired man a little further away. He drank another sip of wine before lowering his eyes to the ground, prying so that his mother would not humiliate him further. But apparently the angels were too busy to help him as he heard his mother say :

"He's attracted to boys too! "

"Mother!" Credence protested.

Before she could add more, Mrs. Goldstein approached the small group.

"Henrietta, I think you must come and see the sauce; we have a problem. "

"Come on, Mary, it's very simple, just mix it! "

Madame Goldstein had the most unobtrusive look in the world, her eyes shuttling back and forth between Credence and Percival. And after the most fake excuses Credence had ever heard, the two women walked away whispering, leaving him alone with Graves. He took his courage in both hands to manage to put his gaze on the man's face. He forced himself to smile before pulling at his cigarette, already half consumed.

"So... " he said.

"So... " Graves repeated, visibly annoyed by the situation.

He wasn't making it easy for him, and the young man was more and more eager to run away. After another breath of nicotine, he asked :

"Did you spend Christmas at your parents' house? "

"Yes. "

Perfect, apparently monosyllable answers were the order of the day. After a little clearing of the throat, Percival said:

"What about you? "

"Oh no! I was at an incredible party! I don't think I remember half of it. "

He wanted to slap his face. Why was he saying that? As if his mother wasn't enough, he had to put himself down even more! Percival cast a strange glance at him, and the youngest understood what his father had meant by "scornful". He felt judged and it was extremely unpleasant.

"I should... I should stop talking... " said Credence.

"Yes, and maybe it's just time to eat more than drink. " 

Percival's sentence was like a blow to him. He had thought that the wide shirt would serve to hide his thin figure, but he had obviously been mistaken, judging by the strange look that Graves brought up along his body. And without another word, Percival took a determined step away in the direction of the buffet.

Credence stood still for a moment. He finished his drink in one sip, before moving towards Tina. She immediately noticed his discomfort and after apologizing to the young man with whom she was talking, she pulled him aside.

"Are you all right? " she asked. "What did he say to you? "

"I don't feel very well," he confessed.

Without asking his opinion, she took his glass and his cigarette out of his hands before dragging him to the table. She refrained from lecturing him on his diet and simply filled a plate with a piece of pie and a bit of turkey. They were choosing an assortment of vegetables when Credence recognized beside him the voice of Viviane Graves, Percival's mother.

"Apparently he lives just a few streets away from you! "

So there was a chance that they would run into each other again. Or maybe not, after all, New York was a big city with countless citizens.

"Mother, I don't need you to find someone for me!" Graves said in a dry tone. "Especially not a ridiculous, depressive kid who is visibly suffering from eating disorders, who is unable to express himself properly, who smokes and drinks so much that he has memory lapses and who thinks he is a fashion designer. " 

_Bam._ He felt as if he had received a violent punch in the abdomen. Graves wasn't shy, he was just an asshole. Credence felt all colors leave his face as he looked up at Percival and his mother. Viviane turned around at the same moment and seemed to panic when she realized that the young man had heard them. How could he be so cruel and rude? Who did he think he was, this pretentious jerk? Clenching his teeth to refrain from insulting Percival, who had just laid his eyes on Credence too, the young man grabbed his plate before turning his heels and leaving the room in a hurry, ignoring Tina's calls.

Percival Graves was definitely not the man of his dreams. He was not at all the knight of the round table, rather the villain that everyone hates and who thinks he is superior to others. 

And Credence thought to himself that from now on he would never again let the opinions of others influence him. It was at that very moment that he realized that it was time for him to change the way he approached life and people. He was going to take his future in hand, rebuild himself, and kick out all the assholes who wouldn't be able to respect him. And it started today.


	2. Good resolutions and small errors

Credence, slumped on his sofa, a long T-shirt as his only clothing, lit a new cigarette. He had spent his day watching stupid TV movies that only made him feel lonelier, ignoring the calls of his friends and the untimely gurgling of his stomach. Eating could wait, he was the main character in a drama in three acts for the moment.

After yet another glass of wine, he staggered to his feet to connect his phone to his speaker. And in a far too dramatic gesture, he launched " _All by myself_ " by Céline Dion. The music started and he grabbed one of the fashion magazines that were lying around on the floor and used it as a microphone. Then he began to play back the lyrics, letting himself be taken in by the song as if it had been written for him, closing his eyes, falling to his knees towards the end, opening his arms wide like a great music star.

_Don't wanna live_

_By myself, by myself_

_Anymore_

_By myself_

_Anymore_

He must have looked completely crazy and pathetic, and his downstairs neighbor must have hated him, but he didn't care. Today was the last miserable day he would give himself before he started his new life. The Christmas holidays were coming to an end and this new year would be far more promising than any that had gone before.

He had made up his mind that he would make sure that next year he wouldn't be found in his flat, half-drunk listening to depressing songs for the lovesick. He was going to take control of his life and start writing a diary.

And that's exactly what he did the very next day. After a long shower and a thorough cleaning of his flat, Credence went to his desk and wrote his name on the first page of the blue notebook.

_Credence Jones_

This diary was going to be an opportunity to free himself from his fears and apprehensions, but above all to learn to have confidence in him. At least, he hoped so... It would also be a great way to express his thoughts about the arrogant jerks who were making comments about his physique and his style of clothes (any resemblance to an existing person would be purely coincidental). On the next page he noted:

_Weight: 122 lbs (really too low)_

_Cigarettes: 42 per day (really too many...)_

_Alcohol: really too much..._

His first resolution: it was imperative to gain weight and build muscles, which implied joining the gym and opting for a more diversified diet. Resolution number two: review his wardrobe and force himself to buy colour. Resolution number 3: Spend more time with friends and force himself to tell his parents what he was thinking. And finally, his last resolution: find a nice and sensitive boyfriend and stop himself from developing feelings for one of the following types of men:

**\- Workaholic**

**\- Womanizer / Manizer**

**\- Phobic of commitment**

**\- Megalo**

**\- Twisted**

**\- Pervert**

Above all, he had to be careful not to continue to fantasize about one person in particular, who combined many of these characteristics: his boss Gellert Grindelwald.

He had been working for the MACUSA publishing house for two years now, and even though he had been trying for a long time to prevent himself from falling for Mr. Grindelwald's charms, he had failed miserably. The worst thing was that Credence had to see him every day and was almost convinced that Gellert didn't even know his first name. That and the fact that his boss was probably irremediably heterosexual, judging by the gossip of his colleagues?

Gellert Grindelwald was a charismatic thirty-something. He had blond hair, dark eyes, a devastating smile and a sense of fashion that had always fascinated Credence. In short, typically the kind of men the young man had a crush on...

After a long sigh, he closed his diary. He put his coat on before going out to do some shopping. His fridge had been empty for far too long and eating apples, coffee and dried almonds was certainly not going to help him gain weight. The freezing humidity outside was almost unbearable and he hurried to his usual grocery shop.

He went around the shop, randomly adding items to his basket before taking, as usual, an astronomical quantity of apples and tomatoes. After all, vegetables and fruit were not bad for the health. Well, certainly, it wasn't very nourishing. So he added two pieces of fish, a box of ham and a bag of potatoes to ease his conscience.

At the checkout he found himself behind a man whose appearance vaguely reminded him of someone. He had already seen these shoulders somewhere... And he suddenly felt like disappearing when the man turned towards him. Percival Graves... Great...

"Credence. " he greeted him, condescendingly.

How in God's name could he be so awful in one word? Credence clenched his teeth, forcing himself to smile before he greeted him back. Graves stared at him for a moment, before looking at the younger one's purchases. He raised an eyebrow before asking :

"Are you stocking up on apples for the winter? "

Was he trying to be funny? Because it wasn't amusing at all. Percival cleared his throat before adding:

"You know that apples are low in calories, right? It would be better if you started eating normally. "

Credence stared at him with round eyes, shocked by what he had just heard. Who did he think he was? And since when had the young man's diet been one of his concerns? And what else? He was a dietician as well as a lawyer! Why did he bother?

Credence opened and closed his mouth several times, unable to know what to answer. And before he could find a scathing reply to say, the cashier greeted Percival. Graves paid quickly, picked up his bags, and after a vague movement of his head to Credence's attention, he left the grocery shop.

More angry than ever, fulminating in silence, the young man promised himself that he would never converse with Percival Graves again and that the next pages of his diary would be devoted to raving at this idiot. What he did not know was that he would have to see him often. Really often... 

* * *

The return to work came as a blessing for Credence. He felt as if he was going mad, locked up in his little flat, thinking about Percival's rudeness and imagining Gellert's inaccessible body.

Behind his computer, he read distractedly the many e-mails accumulated during his two weeks off, doing his best to avoid looking in the direction of his boss.

In front of him, Gemma Ya Zhou was glaring at him annoyed while trying to keep her calm with the person she had on the phone. Credence gave her a compassionate smile. He and Gemma weren't particularly close, largely because his colleague had an incredibly busy schedule between work, dance and yoga classes, her three children and her ex-husband (soon to be ex ex-husband for the second time from what Credence understood.). But despite this, he had always found Gemma endearing and caring.

Mr. Shaw entered the room and without much thought, Credence wished him a Happy New Year. The old man turned to him, and as the young man expected, he looked at him with a disgusting lustful look.

"Happy New Year Christopher! "

Mr. Shaw, or rather Mr. _Repul-shaw_ as Credence called him, was Gellert's superior. And therefore, by extension, his superior as well. He was a perverted man who allowed himself to ogle everyone without any embarrassment, especially the young man's buttocks, without ever taking the trouble to remember the names of his employees.

Credence lowered his eyes, feeling his stomach get knotted. Those disgusting eyes made him nauseous. Shaw passed by, entering the Grindelwald glass kisses office without knocking. _Perverse and ill-mannered on top of that..._ Unwittingly, his gaze fell on Gellert and he lost himself in contemplation before the ringing of his work phone brought him back to reality. He picked up the call, answering the usual: Publicity.

"Hi, honey! I was thinking about you and wondering how you were doing. "

Queenie's joyful voice made him smile. She was the only person to have this telephone number apart from his colleagues. He had agreed to give it to her after the young woman had had a panic attack, unable to reach him on his personal phone, and convinced that Credence was in terrible condition. Queenie Goldstein had always had the unusual ability to know how people around her felt, even from a distance. She had developed a special bond with Credence since childhood, watching over him like a guardian angel. It might sound stupid, but the young man was convinced that it was magic. 

"I'm fine, thank you. And you, my sweetie? " he smiled.

"I'm fine, honey! The bakery is doing wonderfully and I've never been happier! Jacob and I have finally decided on a date for the wedding! "

"That's great news! I am so happy for you, you are one of the most wonderful people I know."

And as he was finishing his sentence, Credence looked up at Grindelwald's face which was right in front of him. He blushed violently, thinking at full speed about how best to make this call sound like a business call.

"This is the opinion of some people about Malfoy, whose next book will be published by MACUSA. And they couldn't be more right, because his books brilliantly develop a complete, credible and surprisingly sincere fantasy world. "

Gellert frowned, a smirk on his lips. Credence didn't know where to put himself, he had an incredible desire to disappear. He had to hang up. He had to hang up now! NOW!

"I'm glad I could help you, thank you for calling Mrs Morrison. "

And he ended the call abruptly. Gellert stared at him for a few more seconds before handing him a file over his computer screen.

"The list of preparations and guests for the launch of the next Malfoy. " He said

Credence grabbed the file, swallowing with difficulty, lowering his head in the vain attempt to hide behind his hair. Gellert turned away from him, taking a few steps before stopping and returning to Credence. He leaned towards him, an unreadable expression on his face.

"Morrison? " he asked.

"Uh... Yes... " Credence answered

"As in Toni Morrison? "

Credence nodded, a shy smile on his lips. He could hardly understand what Grindelwald was getting at.

"The Chloe Anthony Wofford Morrison? " he insisted again.

"Yes"

Gellert stood up, his mouth forming an "o", visibly delighted by the news. Credence blushed more and over his screen he saw Gemma's panicked gaze. It didn't augur any good... His boss walked away again and before entering his office, he said in a loud voice:

"It's funny what you're telling me Mr. Jones, I was almost convinced that Mrs. Morrison passed away last summer. I am glad to hear that you have resurrected her. "

 _Holy shit!_ thought Credence, completely panicked. Without another word, Gellert walked into his office, leaving the young man to his anguish. He had just lost his job for one of the stupidest reasons in the world. No doubt he was going to have to describe it all in his diary. And he absolutely had to see his friends tonight, a crisis meeting. His life was ruined!

* * *

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry!" Queenie apologized.

Credence shrugged softly. It wasn't her fault; he should have hung up and apologized to his boss instead of trying to lie. He had made a fool of himself and he was going to pay the price. After a brief sigh, he finished his mojito and ordered a new one. Almost immediately the waiter brought him a new drink and winked at him with an indiscreet smile.

"Oh my God, I think he likes you!" Jacob laughed.

"He's fucking ridiculous, Credence deserves much better than that! " Nagini sighed.

"I support Nag, not at all interesting! " Tina added.

Credence looked at each of his friends in turn. The small group sometimes had trouble getting together, but tonight, after the young man's panicked message, they had all met in their usual bar. Nagini was a famous tattoo artist, an independent young woman who smoked even more than Credence and who loved to say vulgar things and above all " fuck ". Jacob was the fiancé of Queenie, a baker whose pastries were known all over Manhattan, a generous and kindly Englishman with a sense of humor that belonged only to him. And of course there were the Goldstein twins, Tina and Queenie, his childhood friends.

Credence sighed again. Alcohol didn't seem to help his anguish.

"But what am I going to do? " he said in a plaintive voice.

"Is Gellert still fucking sexy? " asked Nagini.

The young man blushed violently for any answer and Queenie laughed. Yes Gellert was still incredibly attractive. Too much for Credence's sanity.

"Do we know for a fact that he's straight? " said Jacob.

Queenie's face suddenly closed, as if Jacob's sentence sounded like an insult. Nagini seemed to wait with apprehension for the rest of the discussion. Credence frowned, unsure of following what his friend was getting at. What did his imminent dismissal have to do with his boss's sexual orientation?

"What are you implying? "

"That you give him a fucking blowjob," Nagini replied curtly. 

He choked on his own saliva, putting his hand on his chest to try to find his breath and his spirits. Nag looked angry, and Queenie obviously shared her anger. Tina looked up to the sky, exasperated, before saying :

"Nag, what a delicacy... "

"What? Isn't that what you're implying, Jacob? " she asked dryly.

"Of course not!" he defended himself. "I just thought that if Credence made himself a little more attractive in the days to come, Grindelwald could get over it. "

Credence grimaced. Firstly because he wasn't a fan of the idea, and secondly because he was convinced that Gellert wouldn't notice him even if he arrived at the office half-naked. Queenie straightened up, visibly furious, her fist clenched next to her glass. This rarely happened, but when she was mad, it was often to protect her sister or Credence.

"Credence is fine the way he is! " she said. "And he didn't do five years of study for nothing! If this German idiot can't forgive him for a mistake, then he might as well go and work elsewhere! "

Poor Jacob suddenly became very pale, and Credence couldn't help but come to his rescue. He had slept enough on their couch to know that he was not comfortable...

"Queenie, it's all right, I'm not angry. " He reassured her.

"No, of course you're not! You are much too nice for that ! "

"Darling, I'm sorry, it was a stupid idea," Jacob apologized. "Sorry, Credence. "

"It's all right, Jacob. " he smiled.

The tension subsided slowly, and after a long silence, it was Tina who spoke up and said :

"My advice: go to work tomorrow, don't change your habits, and you'll see what happens. With a bit of luck, he may have forgotten everything. "

Credence was really not sure it would be that simple. And even if Jacob's proposal made him uncomfortable, he couldn't help but consider it... (the decent version, of course !) After all, he had nothing to lose.

* * *

He had spent a considerable amount of time getting ready. He had even gotten up an hour early so that he had time to wash his hair and style it properly. He chose a black turtleneck, high waist beige trousers, black Richelieu shoes and a Burberry suit jacket that Henrietta gave him for Christmas. He couldn't remember the last time he had spent so much time in front of his mirror and he thought he looked ridiculous.

And Percival Graves's voice echoed in his mind: " _who thinks he's a fashion designer_ ". This idiot lawyer was chasing him everywhere! Credence shook his head to escape his thoughts and after a last glance at the mirror, he grabbed his coat and scarf before setting off.

When he got out of the elevator in MACUSA and walked towards the open space, he felt his heart drumming horribly against his ribs. He must have been as red as a tomato. He took a deep breath to give himself courage. _You just have to walk across the office, sit behind your computer and act as if nothing had happened,_ he thought _. Nothing could be easier. It's a piece of cake._

Raising his chin and straightening himself up for more confidence, Credence stepped into the room, reaching his chair and stopping to look at the large desk with its glass walls. He turned on his computer, took out his files and began to work, under the surprised gaze of Gemma, who refrained from making the slightest comment.

He was barely halfway through the first document he was consulting when he heard his computer announce a new private message on his department's chat channel. He was expecting Gemma's name to be displayed, but he was more than surprised to discover that the sender was Grindelwald. His stomach began to rumble with apprehension. He was about to get fired.

Credence tried to calm his breathing and heartbeat as he clicked on the message.

**From: Gellert Grindelwald**

**Subject: Serious problem!**

Oh my God, he was completely fucked up. His boss was going to call him in his office to tell him he could get his stuff and leave. Credence looked up above his screen to see if his boss was watching him, but no, Gellert seemed completely focused on the phone call he was making. Then the mail opened completely.

**_"It looks like your trousers are sick. "_ **

Credence almost choked on his own saliva as he blushed violently. He had not yet recovered from his astonishment that a new message was being displayed.

 ** _"It looks like your trousers have merged with your body. Are your trousers unwell?_** **_"_**

A nervous laugh passed his lips. After a short hesitation, he placed his hands on his keyboard to type an answer.

**From: Credence Jones**

**_"I am shocked by the content of your message. My trousers are fine and are not sick at all. Maybe it's the management that has a problem? Because certainly the management makes discriminatory judgements against skinny trousers. Should I create a petition?"_ **

He pressed send and his anxiety took a turn for the worse. Never in his life had he dared to do such a thing. And yet he wanted to burst out laughing more than to run away. Discreetly, he observed Gellert's reaction, who opened his message after a few seconds.

His boss suddenly raised his eyebrows before turning in his direction. He looked at Credence for a few moments before displaying the sexiest smile the young man had ever seen. Then he leaned back towards his computer again, wedging his phone between his shoulder and his ear.

And Credence received a new message just afterwards.

**From: Gellert Grindelwald**

**_"My sincerest apologies for having offended you. The petition can wait. It is a real pleasure to have you with us today, Mr. Jones. I look forward to seeing you walk past my office tomorrow morning. "_ **

**__ **


	3. It all begins

_Weight : 132 lbs_

_Cigarettes: 25 per day_

_Alcohol: 1 glass of wine in the evening. Sometimes 2. (Maybe 3, but who's counting?)_

No matter how many times Credence had repeated that he absolutely had to stop flirting with Gellert, it had become stronger than him. As much as he had admitted that he had quickly forgotten his last resolution...

The messages followed one another, sometimes tender, sometimes suggestive, but always with a purpose of making each other smile. The young man didn't know if their glances and their little smiles had been noticed by their colleagues, but for once he had decided not to pay attention to that. Grindelwald made him happy, he felt lighter, more handsome, more important.

For a month they continued to exchange messages, without trying to go any further in their relationship. Credence always made sure he was well dressed and well groomed, wearing with a certain ease the clothes his mother had given him and which he had so often been embarrassed to put on at work. He liked to feel good about himself, to feel wanted too when he walked past the bay windows of Gellert's office.

It was at the beginning of February that things changed considerably. After a day too long to arrange the preparations for the launch of Malfoy's book scheduled for the following month, Credence had grabbed his coat before leaving for the elevator. Gemma had had to leave earlier because of one of her children and most of the work had fallen on his shoulders. He sighed before pressing the button, waiting silently. Then he climbed up into the small space, closely followed by Tony, one of his colleagues, who gave him a vague polite smile. The doors were about to close when an arm passed between them and the elevator opened again on Grindelwald, visibly out of breath.

A smirk formed on his lips as he stood next to Credence in the small space. The lift was about to close again when Leta, another colleague, passed her hand in and said :

''Gellert, London is on the phone. ''

''Er... I'll call them back tomorrow. '' Grindelwald replied

''It seems quite urgent. ''

''Leta, it's 8 o'clock, I think it can wait until tomorrow morning. ''

She nodded before turning her heels and the elevator could begin its descent. There was an embarrassed silence in the small space, and Credence didn't dare look up at the blond man. He was suddenly very hot and felt himself blushing for no particular reason, as if all the assurance he had had in his e-mails had just evaporated.

The elevator stopped for the first time, and Tony got off, quickly greeting Credence and Gellert before disappearing. Grindelwald leaned a little more towards the young man.

''Credence, I have to... '' he started.

But the rest of his sentence died on his lips as Mr _Repul-shaw_ entered the small space. The three men greeted each other politely and a new silence took place. Credence almost choked on his saliva when he felt Gellert's hand resting on his buttocks. He felt himself blushing to the roots of his hair, swallowing with difficulty, his hands clinging to his coat, his heart pounding against his ribs. His blood was so boiling that he was unable to hear the conversation between Mr. Shaw and the blond man over the noise in his ears.

Then the lift finally reached the ground floor and the three of them left the small space. Gellert left for the reception desk, as if nothing had happened, and before Credence could follow him, Mr. Shaw called him. The young man turned to him with a tense smile on his face.

'' Christopher, for the launch of our next book, I would like you to do my introduction. So you introduce me, and I'll introduce the book and the author. ''

His disgusting eyes passed along Credence's body, stopping for a moment at his thighs before moving up to his face. The young man felt incredibly uncomfortable and would have loved to tell him that he could not care less about his introduction, and that he could put it into the most intimate parts of his anatomy. But instead, he just smiled and replied :

''Yes, of course. '' 

And after one last misplaced glance, the old man left for his office. Credence sighed loudly. He had missed a discussion with Gellert because of this unbearable pervert! His thoughts were interrupted by a deep voice whispering in his ear:

''You’re named Christopher now? ''

Credence was startled, turning quickly to Gellert, who didn't even try to hide his amusement. The young man put one of his black curls behind his ear, blushing slightly, displaying a nervous smile. He felt like a schoolgirl talking to her crush for the first time.

'' What are you doing tonight, _Credence_? '' Grindelwald asked

Credence's brain worked at full speed. Did he have to accept this supposed invitation? Did he have to refuse? Would it be better to make him wait? Was saying yes to a meal tonight a good idea? Suddenly he remembered the dinner at Tina's house, and he had to say:

''Tonight I'm busy. ''

''Ah... That's a pity... I thought I'd invite your beautiful trousers for a drink. Maybe you could join us. ''

Credence laughed, putting on his coat to try to escape the dark irises of the blond man. He had his heart beating atrociously fast, it was almost ridiculous.

''Why not tomorrow night? ''

''No, tomorrow night is the dinner discussion to finalize the launch of Malfoy. ''

''Ah shit, that's right..." Gellert sighed. ''What a shitty book... Probably the worst we've ever published... ''

''Fortunately, this is not the slogan we have kept. '' Credence mocked gently.

Then, in an attempt to make himself more desirable, he played with his hair for a few moments before wishing Gellert a good evening and walking away towards the door, in an incredibly dramatic way. He hadn't taken two steps that the other man said:

''What about another evening? ''

A smile appeared on his lips, but he forced himself not to turn around and answered in a detached tone:

'' We'll see, shall we? Good evening Gellert. ''

And he left the building. Walking through the cold streets of New York, Credence had only one desire: to confide in his diary about this unimaginable turning point in his relationship with Gellert. But that would have to wait until he had discussed it with Tina. Perhaps his best friend would have some advice for him now that she was madly in love with the redhead she had met at his parents' house.

* * *

In the weeks that followed, Credence was unable to see Gellert again, as he had to travel to London to sign some agreements with top management. And so the month of February ended without a first dinner and only sprinkled with messages and quick smiles. He ran into Percival at the grocery shop several times, but miraculously managed to avoid him each time.

And of course the evening of the book launch arrived. Nagini and Queenie had spent the previous weekend shopping with Credence for finding the best outfit for him, often arguing over what would make him look more attractive.

He had spent the day of the reception in the bathroom taking care of his skin and hair, anxious as he was on the eve of his prom. He had also hesitated for a long time between putting on simple underwear or lingerie, but under Nag's wise advice (" _if you want to fuck, choose lace_!"), he had opted for lingerie. It may have been stupid, but he felt he had to get Gellert's attention tonight. Or maybe he was just afraid that if his boss saw him again tonight he would realize how banal Credence was.

On the way, he practiced his text several times, more anxious than ever at the thought of speaking in front of all their associates and guests. He was convinced he was going to be ridiculous. When Credence entered the room, he was immediately greeted by Gemma's warm smile. He chatted with her for a moment, happy to see her husband (ex-husband?) who greeted him with a friendly grin.

Credence noticed Gellert a little further away, but following Queenie's advice, he was careful not to take too much interest in him, and to circulate among the guests in a relaxed manner. Queenie had told him to stay " _distant and enigmatic_ ". He wasn't sure what she meant by that, but it certainly meant not standing in front of him staring at him like a teenage girl in love. After a vain attempt to start a discussion with a group of pompous philosophical writers, he walked away and came face to face with the man he least expected to see: Percival Graves.

Oh for God's sake, this man was everywhere! He blinked several times, as if to convince himself that he wasn't hallucinating, then forced himself to display a tight smile.

''Percival Graves... '' he said.

''Credence Jones. '' the other replied in the same tone.

The young man brought his glass of wine to his lips. He felt strangely uncomfortable, especially thinking back to their last exchange at the grocery shop. To avoid the awkward silence, he asked :

''What are you doing here? ''

''I'm asking myself exactly the same question... I came here with a colleague. ''

 _As friendly as ever..._ thought Credence. He took another sip, taking a quick look around him in the hope of finding a way out. But against all expectations, Graves spoke again.

''So... How are you? ''

''Apart from my disappointment at not seeing your lovely deer-headed jumper and the fact that they don't serve any apples in their hors d'oeuvres, I'm fine. And how are you? ''

A strange glow took place in the lawyer's eyes and Credence was unable to tell whether his sentence had amused or hurt him. He didn't give a damn, Percival was the least of his worries. Graves opened his mouth to answer but at the same time Gemma appeared at his side and asked with a huge smile:

''Credence? Are you going to introduce us? ''

If Credence had decided to be honest and a little mean he would have said: " _Gemma is my colleague at work who thinks she is a Wonder woman and who spends her time separating and then getting back together with her husband. Percival, is an insensitive moron who takes a passion for the people' s diet and is morose because of his inability to find someone who can stand him without running away._ " But Credence had never been cruel, so after a slight clearing of the throat to give himself some composure, he says:

''Gemma is my colleague and friend, she works in advertising with me. Percival is a brilliant lawyer whom I had the pleasure of meeting at my parents' annual buffet last Christmas. ''

A smirk formed on Graves's lips, and Credence tried to ignore the strange pressure he felt in his gut. _He's not sexy, he's unpleasant_! he repeated. He averted his eyes and took another sip of wine while Gemma began a casual conversation with Percival. Then a woman joined the group, standing next to Viviane’s son. She was gorgeous, with light blond hair, a beautiful midnight blue dress, a bright smile and perfect dark skin.

She placed her hand on Percival's shoulder before asking him to introduce her. Graves straightened up, the same strange smirk on his lips, before he said :

''Seraphina, this is Credence Jones. Credence, this is Sera, my colleague and friend. Credence is an advertiser for this publishing house and he used to chase me around half-naked when he was younger. ''

Credence felt horribly pale. Why did he say that? He who had decided to be kind, he would have done better to speak his mind. He felt humiliated, and it was disagreeable. What an awful person! Percival hastened to drink his liquor, looking away, as if he was trying to escape Credence's shocked and wounded face.

'' Really?" Seraphina mocked. ''How strange...Gemma, how are the children? ''

''Ah, don't tell me about it... '' Credence's colleague sighed.

The two women walked away, obviously good friends, so they could talk to each other, whispering and giggling like teenagers. When Credence looked up at Grave, the lawyer's jaw was tensed and his complexion livid. The young man looked for the person that Percival stared at so coldly before discovering that it was Gellert.

Did the two men know each other? It was impossible! The world was not that small! How could it be that Grindelwald knew Graves?

Gellert must have felt that someone was looking at him because he raised his eyes to them and when he noticed Percival, he turned pale too, giving him a vague head movement. Without another word, Graves walked away, royally ignoring Credence as if he had never spoken to him. What a rude man! _Imbecile!_

The fateful moment came to make Mr. Shaw's presentation, and of course, in his great good fortune, Credence was unable to get the microphone working, forcing him to shout a "Hear, hear! "to get the attention of the audience. Everyone stared at him and he blushed terribly, babbling his introduction in the most ridiculous and laughable way. He had the misfortune of meeting Percival Graves's gaze, and he felt even more grotesque. Only Gemma seemed compassionate to his situation. And the worst was when Mr Shaw got on the stage and managed to turn on the microphone in one go, proving to everyone how stupid Credence Jones was.

After that, he had a terrible urge to run away. So he took refuge near the bar, having a few drinks, trying to contain his smoking craving. He felt like crying and disappearing. Especially when his eyes had the misfortune to meet Percival's irises. As he began his fourth glass of wine, Graves started a movement in his direction, but a hand landed on Credence's waist and Viviane’s son immediately turned away. Credence looked over his shoulder to discover Gellert's smiling face.

''Quite a presentation, Mr. Jones!" he grinned.

Credence had a sad laugh that vaguely resembled a muffled sob. He blinked several times to chase away the burning tears that threatened to escape. Gellert leaned towards him and whispered in his ear.

''You look beautiful tonight. And I think I'm going to take you to the restaurant now, whether you like it or not. ''

Credence raised his shining eyes to him. That was exactly what he needed: to get away from this evening. Gellert put a quick kiss on his temple before asking him to fetch his coat and meet him in the hall. Credence did so, more than happy to escape Percival's heavy gaze.

The fresh air outside did him the greatest good and offered him the opportunity to let a few tears escape on the pretext that it was because of the cold. Gellert guided him through the crowded streets with a comforting hand on his back. Then he took him into a beautiful French restaurant before leading him to the table that was obviously his. The waitress brought them the menu, greeting Gellert warmly before walking away.

Credence was unable to choose, so it was Grindelwald who decided on their food and wine. When the bottle of alcohol arrived, the older man served their two glasses before asking, in a tone that was meant to be detached:

''So, Credence. Where do you know Percival Graves from? ''

Credence looked up to heaven. _Do we really have to talk about this individual?_

''He's the son of a friend of my mum. And apparently, I used to spend my days chasing him half-naked when we were children... ''

''I'm not surprised, you little depraved one! '' Gellert joked.

''What about you? ''

Grindelwald had a strange expression, a mixture of embarrassment and sadness. He laid his eyes on the table, playing distractedly with his fork.

'' Oh, er... I don't know if... '' he mumbled.

Credence didn't want to seem insistent, but he really wanted to know how the two men knew each other. After a few moments of silence, he ventured to say:

'' You can tell me, he's no friend of mine. ''

Gellert stared at him for a few seconds. Then he took a deep breath before answering:

''He was best man at my wedding. We had met in Germany during his trip to Europe and we had quickly become friends. And uh... Well... No nothing... ''

''And then what? ''

''And then two years later, I saw him again. I invited him to come and spend some time with me and my wife. And it was the worst decision of my life since I caught them naked in the library the next day. ''

Credence almost choked on his sip of wine. How could anyone be so despicable? So selfish! And he took the liberty of judging people on top of that! His mother had really scraped the bottom of the drawers when she decided to introduce him to this asshole Percival!

''Oh my God... He's a bastard! '' Credence exclaimed, shocked. ''No wonder his fiancée left him! Boring and contemptuous on top of that! ''

''Yes, that describes him quite well... '' Gellert smiled sadly.

The younger one suddenly had the urge to strangle Graves, to make him swallow his superior air and his unbearable manners. Grindelwald cleared his throat, shaking his head as if to chase away his bad memories, before saying:

''Anyway, we're not here to talk about that bastard! Now, Credence, I want you to describe how you learned to kiss with your tongue. ''

Credence laughed, a little surprised by the sudden change of subject, while the other served him another glass of wine. The rest of the dinner went wonderfully well. Gellert was very funny, but above all extremely attractive, and he did not hesitate to slide his foot along Credence's ankle several times. The youngest felt more and more succumbed to his charm, and alcohol was a great help in letting himself be seduced.

After several hours they left the restaurant and when it was time to say goodbye, Grindelwald approached Credence, putting one of his brown curls behind his ear. The younger one shivered, blushing softly. Gellert had a glowing gaze, the kind of gaze that melts ice in the middle of winter, the kind of gaze that made Credence's heart skip a beat.

''Can I ask you to come to my house tonight?" he said in a deep voice.

''I'd better go home..." Credence replied, visibly unconvinced by his own sentence.

''Yes... Maybe... '' Gellert murmured.

And the next moment he had his lips against those of Credence. The youngest's heart flew into his chest and his stomach seemed to release a multitude of butterflies. Closing his eyes, Credence hastened to respond to the kiss. He felt as if he'd been waiting for this all his life. Gellert wrapped his arms around his waist and brought him close to him while Credence wrapped his arms around his neck.

He couldn't possibly describe how they got into a taxi and then how they got to Grindelwald's flat. All he knew was that he had never felt as wanted as he did that evening. The elder one was both tender and passionate, undoing Credence's clothes with adoring delicacy while helping him to lie down on the silk sheets. Then suddenly he stood up and exclaimed:

''Oh my God Credence, you're wearing lingerie! ''

'' Oh shit!" Credence cursed, furious at himself, blushing violently.

Grindelwald was going to take him for a teaser or a slut. But before he could try to hide his underwear, Gellert bent down to capture his mouth again.

''I love it... '' he whispered against his lips.

And after these simple words, Credence was entirely his, surrendering to his embrace and his ardor.

Fuck his insecurity, fuck those who thought he was too skinny, fuck Mr. Shaw and his introduction, fuck those who allowed themselves to judge him, and most of all, fuck Percival Graves. Tonight, in the warmth of this flat, it was only the warmth of Gellert's skin against his own that counted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, Percival really is tactless sometimes... And Gellert of course is there at the right time... Well well, I hope this chapter wasn't too terrible ^^ Don't hesitate to leave me a comment, it's always nice to have a feedback ^^


	4. And then it all collapses

_Weight : 138 lbs_

_Cigarettes: 20 per day_

_Alcohol: Only with Gellert. And always after sex_

Lying in the large bed, Credence had difficulty coming down from his orgasm and regaining a regular breathing. And he was rather pleased to see that Gellert was in the exact same situation.

" Oh my God, this was incredible!" the older man said, moving away from him to lie down beside him.

A huge smile lit up Credence's face. He turned to the side so he could observe easily Gellert. He found him more and more handsome, and in all sincerity, he had never been happier, and he was terrified of falling irremediably in love.

" Gellert? " he murmured.

" Credence? " he smiled, turning to look him in the eye.

"What are we doing at the office? "

"I'm very glad you asked. You see, MACUSA is a publishing house. That means we publish books. And in our department, we promote these books. " He joked.

Credence laughed before bending over to kiss him. Then he stepped aside, keeping one hand on his cheek before asking:

"No, what I meant was: do you think people will notice? "

Gellert frowned.

" Notice what? "

"Us. You know, working together, eating together, sleeping together. All the things that we..."

"Wait," Grindelwald interrupted him. "Wait a minute, Credence. Not too fast, okay? It started barely 12 days ago. We can't talk about a long-term relationship yet. Not yet. Even if there are some _pretty long_ things between us... "

He ended his phase with a suggestive smile, playing with his eyebrows, his hands resting on the hips of the younger one. Credence might have been anxious, taking it as a rejection, but he could not help but agree with Gellert. It had only just begun, and the last thing he wanted was to scare him away. Especially when the blond man was putting kisses on his neck, wringing some moans out of him. 

"You really are the bad boy, aren't you?" Credence whispered.

"You haven't seen anything yet, darling. "

Grindelwald captured his lips, kissing him passionately, his hands running through his pale skin, caressing his belly and his thighs. But Credence's telephone ringing interrupted them abruptly. The younger one kissed him quickly to apologize, before bending over to the bedside table to get his phone. He picked up without even checking the number, straddling Gellert's thighs.

"Credence Jones, God of sex who holds a bad boy between his thighs! "

"Credence? "

He felt himself blushing to the roots of his hair. Getting up out of bed, he opened his eyes wide, more ashamed and shocked at his behavior than ever.

"Mommy? " he stammered.

* * *

It is common knowledge that when things start to get better on one side of your life, another part of your existence breaks down.

Sitting in the small café in the shopping center, Credence was absent-mindedly drinking his tea, unable to get used to the idea of what his mother had just revealed to him. His parents had separated. After forty years of marriage, it had taken them less than three months to separate! It was beyond comprehension!

"Darling, even if I came home with panties on my head, he wouldn't even notice me," Henrietta sighed. "I spent forty years at his side, ironing his shirts, cooking, cleaning the house, raising our son. "

"I'm your son, Mom. " he reminded her.

But Henrietta was obviously too upset to notice, and she continued:

"And now it's the winter of my life, and I have nothing of my own. I mean, something that is entirely mine! I have no power, no career, no sex life... "

Credence really didn't want to hear about this kind of thing. He hid his blushing face in his hands and sighed:

"Oh my God, Mum! "

"What? Before being your mother I am first and foremost a woman, Credence. And don't act like you don't know what sex is. I have no life at all, no life of my own. And besides, Julian thinks I have a lot of potential. "

Wait... what? Ok, pause! What the hell was that all about ? He took his fingers out of his eyes so he could stare at Henrietta. She had a strange smile, dangerously close to the one he sometimes wore in front of Gellert. What exactly was going on?

"Julian? Who's Julian? " he asked, his voice betraying his panic.

Henrietta laughed a little, her cheekbones turning pink, and then she replied:

"The presenter of the TV shopping channel! I auditioned to be his assistant. "

What? But since when did his mother want to be a TV presenter? Since when did she want to leave her serene life and garden parties to throw herself into the world of television? Credence remained silent for a few moments, trying to find meaning in this information. But no, his brain also seemed to give up the idea of making sense of everything that was happening. He blinked several times before he ventured to ask :

"What? "

"It's the most popular show on the channel! " his mother said, as if it was obvious. "And I was selected. I start next Monday. "

How could things have changed so quickly? And his father, what did Charles Jones have to say about all of this? Was she really leaving him permanently? They weren't going to get a divorce, were they?! And why was she blushing like that about this Julian?

Henrietta looked at her watch before exclaiming:

"Oh, I didn't see the time! I've got to run, darling! "

Credence hastened to get up to take her in his arms, suddenly anxious at the thought of seeing her leave. The whole situation made him dizzy. She hugged him tenderly, putting a loud kiss on his cheek before asking :

"By any chance, have you heard from Percival Graves? "

If there was someone he REALLY didn't want to talk about, it was that idiot. He gave her a tense smile before simply replying:

"Goodbye Mummy. "

She didn't insist, but whispered that she thought it was a shame that the two men didn't get along. Credence pretended not to have heard her and after a last kiss on his cheek, she said with a smile:

"Goodbye, my darling. I'm happy to see that you've put on a few kilos, it suits you like a glove."

That's exactly what Gellert told him this morning.

* * *

And a few weeks later, as the beautiful days at the end of April arrived, things had become much worse... On the advice of Tina, who now made the trip between her home and her parents' house much more often, Credence had opted to take the train rather than the car. The train station was more than three-quarters of an hour's walk from the family home and after a busy week, Credence was expecting his father to pick him up. But Charles was missing. The young man hastened into a taxi, more anxious than ever. His father never forgot anything, or at least nothing about Credence. If he hadn't come, it was because something was really wrong.

After paying the taxi, Credence took out his keys, his hands trembling, leaving his suitcase on the first step of the porch. Once the door was unlocked, he called:

"Dad? Dad, I'm home! "

No answer. The only sound that reached him was the one of the television in the small living room to his right. Credence pushed open the door to discover his father in a pitiful state. Charles Jones had always taken great care of his appearance, favoring suits and well-groomed hair. It was undoubtedly from him that Credence had developed the habit of always paying attention to his clothes and hair, even if the more eccentric sides of his outfits came from his mother.

Charles was sitting on the floor, barely three feet from the television. There were leftovers of food everywhere and several bottles of wine littering the floor. And the smell was really unpleasant, as if his father had been locked up in that little room for weeks. And the idea that maybe he had been, terrified the young man. Why had it taken him so long to come? Why hadn't he called sooner? He was so happy with Gellert that he had abandoned the most important man in his life.

"Oh Dad..." he murmured, feeling tears in his eyes.

Charles looked up at him, in a gesture made slow by fatigue and melancholy. He had dark circles under his eyes, emaciated cheeks, a livid, sickly complexion. It wasn't his father, it couldn't be. Where was the self-confident man, protective, charismatic, always smiling? How could he have left him alone for so long?

Credence approached him, sitting on the sofa, putting one hand on his shoulder to show him his support without invading his space too much. Charles turned his attention to the television, in an almost lethargic state. Then suddenly he exclaimed, almost making his son jump:

"Look at that, Credence! Look at her strutting around with that idiot! "

On the TV screen he could easily recognize his mother, even though she was wearing much more make-up than usual. She was wearing a pink outfit strangely close to her body, and the man next to her looked so fake that Credence wondered if he wasn't made of plastic.

"Dad, I'm sorry. When she told me about the separation, I didn't think she would go as far as to leave with him…"

And that was the whole truth! For him, the separation of his parents was impossible! Charles shook his head before turning off the television and saying :

"Apparently she and that grotesque baboon have even settled together! Half of our friends have already had them for dinner! She even invited this oddball to come to the Goldsteins' costume picnic in a couple of weeks! This is not the woman I married, this is not my Henrietta, it's too cruel! "

And he was right, it was selfish and childish. Credence grimaced, putting a slight pressure on his father's shoulder, thinking about the best answer to give him. Then, after a small clearing of his throat, he said:

"I'm sorry... Maybe you could take this opportunity to show her that you're all right and that you don't miss her? "

"But I miss her!" cried his father, his voice trembling dangerously.

Credence had never seen him like that, so close to falling apart, to breaking into tears. And it was confusing, just as it made him suffer. His father was his pillar, his protection, the solid foundation of his life. If he broke apart, Credence wasn't even sure he could help him properly, and that frightened him.

"I know, Dad, but maybe if you show her that it doesn't affect you, or even pushes you to go to other women, it will make her react. "

Charles turned to him, frowning in an expression of doubt.

" You think so ? "he asked, uncertain.

"I'm not sure. I'm not really a reference in terms of love and relationships. " Credence confessed. "But I suppose I can try to give some advice now that I have a boyfriend. "

His father seemed surprised by the announcement. Technically, he and Gellert hadn't yet made it official and hadn't completely defined their relationship, but after almost two months of seeing each other every day, smiling, kissing, making love, Credence thought he could announce with confidence that he had someone in his life. This thought made him smile as much as it made him blush. It was all so new to him.

"A boyfriend? " his father wondered. "A real boyfriend? For how long? "

" For almost two months. " he replied. "And he's perfect. "

* * *

And perfect, Gellert was. Credence would often discover a red rose on his desk in the morning when he arrived at work, Grindelwald would invite him to a restaurant, take him to the cinema, kiss him passionately in the elevator when they were finally alone. Credence felt dangerously falling in love, and no matter how hard he tried to tell himself that it was all still recent, he could hardly contain his feelings. Especially when the blond man was doing something incredibly romantic like he was doing today.

Credence had long hesitated to tell Gellert about the Goldstein picnic which took place every year in mid-May. But in the course of a conversation, he had mentioned the subject of this costumed picnic, and Grindelwald had offered to accompany him. " _Just to see you dressed as a bunny, I'd be ready to go to the other side of the country!_ "he had joked. Yes, because this year's theme was " **rabbit and hunter** ". Credence really didn't know how Mary had come to think it was a good idea, but obviously everyone thought it was very amusing as no one had complained about it. No one except Tina and Queenie, who flatly refused to come to the picnic this year. But after Gellert's joke, Credence had thought that this picnic would be a good opportunity to introduce his "boyfriend" (partner? lover? crush for the past two years? Mister _I'm-incredibly-sexy-and-irresistible_ ?) to his parents. 

And that's how, on that beautiful Friday, May 15th, Credence was getting into Gellert's cabriolet so that they could go away together for a romantic weekend. For the occasion, Grindelwald had booked a room in a nearby hotel so that they could spend more time together before the picnic, which was to take place on Saturday. The sun was high in the sky, the warm weather had arrived, and the idea of spending a few days outside New York with Gellert made the young man happier than ever.

The trip went without a hitch, punctuated by Grindelwald's playlist and the few kisses he would leave on Credence's cheek or lips at each traffic light. Young Jones was feeling light-headed and had no desire to let that sentiment fade away. Gellert had promised to look his best in front of his parents and protect him from the dreadful Mr Lucas who would probably be at the picnic. It couldn't be just a little flirtation or a crush, this kind of situation revealed that it was **_true love_**! 

They arrived at their destination in the middle of the afternoon. At the front desk, they were told that the hotel was full and that they were the only ones, with another couple, who were not participating in the wedding which was taking place there. At the same time, a female voice that Credence had already heard reasoned in the hall.

"You take care of the boat and I'll take care of the files. "

Credence and Gellert turned in the same movement to discover, a few steps behind them, Percival and Seraphina.

Great! What a _surprise_! Damn it, how did Graves always end up in the same place as him? Seraphina was still as beautiful as ever, now wearing a light pink dress that suited her perfectly and a big hat worthy of Grace Kelly. She had an unpleasant little mocking laugh as she passed by Credence, greeting him quickly before leaving the hotel entrance. The young man noticed Gellert's outstretched shoulders beside him, and in a spontaneous gesture, he moved closer to him and put an arm around his waist. Grindelwald laid his eyes on him, smiling tenderly before placing his hand on his shoulder, raising his chin to look down at Graves.

Percival, for his part, had not moved a single inch and seemed unable to remove his eyes from Credence. The young man found it very difficult to sustain his gaze, incapable of knowing if he was judging him, if he looked sad or if he was simply displeased to meet him here. In any case, it was not particularly pleasant. Gellert clears his throat loudly and Graves comes out of his thoughts, suddenly raising his look towards Grindelwald. His face took on a neutral, almost cold expression as he walked towards them.

"A weekend away from the big city, isn't it? " he asked.

"Yes, that's right. " Credence replied.

"I offered Seraphina to come. She'll join me at the Goldsteins' picnic. "

Great, so they would have to see them at the picnic... Since his mother had introduced him to the man, Credence really felt like he was following him like a shadow! Or that fate was really doing things badly...

"We will be able to make progress on our files, so it won't be a completely lost weekend. " Percival added.

"How interesting... What an exciting life you live! " Gellert laughed.

And Credence may not really liked Graves, but there was something in the blond man's voice that unsettled him. Something poisonous and nasty that awakened a strange feeling in him. A feeling of not really knowing him, or at least not knowing him completely. But before he could deepen this feeling, Gellert placed a tender kiss on his forehead before announcing that he would be waiting for him in the bedroom.

Credence nodded with a smile, suddenly finding himself alone in front of Percival's pale face, who again cast an enigmatic glance at him.

"You look well. " he said after a few moments of silence.

"Thank you. " Credence replied. "You look... tired. "

"I am tired. "

Ok, this was starting to get really strange... Credence blushed slightly, more and more uncomfortable. He was rocking back and forth on his feet, twisting his fingers in a nervous habit, trying his best not to bite his lower lip. Then, unable to bear the silence any longer, the young man displayed a polite smile before asking :

"Are you trying to intimidate me by standing so rigidly in front of me, Mr. Graves? "

Percival narrowed his eyes, surely trying to determine whether Credence was simply joking or whether he was mocking him. Then he said:

" I think I've seen you enough to know that I couldn't intimidate you, Credence, even if I tried... "

" Indeed... "

Credence was about to put an end to this discussion to be able to join Gellert upstairs when Percival's voice was heard again:

"I don't… Well, I don’t have the ease of other persons to converse with people who are not... familiar to me, so to speak. "

The young man remained surprised for a few moments by this revelation. Of course, he had realized how tactless and uneasy Percival was in conversing with others, but he certainly did not expect to hear such a sentence. Why did he tell him that? Why did he confide in him? Eager to escape this talk, and at the same time the strange feeling that was tying his stomach in front of Percival's shining eyes, Credence gave him a friendly smile before saying :

"Practice Percival, with a little training I'm sure you'd be more charming then any other man."

And before he could notice the impact his sentence had had on Graves, Credence hurried up the steps of the grand stairs four at a time, more than aware of the dark irises that watched him walk away.

Later in the afternoon, Gellert proposed to go to the lake. They rented two little boats and sailed for a long and perfect time. At the beginning, Grindelwald tried to utter romantic phrases that made Credence blush. Then he began to invent ridiculous verses to make him laugh.

"Oh, do you know this one? " _There was a young man from Illing, who had a peculiar feeling. He laid on his back, and opened his ass crack_!"

"Gellert, you're vulgar! " laughed Credence.

A little further on, the young man saw Percival and Seraphina, sitting in a boat, staring at them. For a moment he was lost in his thoughts, suddenly unable to turn his eyes away from Graves's gaze. But Gellert's boat collided with his own and this brought him back to reality.

" Board!" cried the blond man.

Credence burst out laughing as the boats swayed dangerously. And what was bound to happen occurred: Gellert lost his balance and fell all the way into the lake. The young man was unable to stop laughing while the other one came to the surface. A large smile appeared on his lips as he tried to splash Credence.

"Do you think it's funny? " he asked, more amused than angry.

" Yes, really! "

"Ah perfect! You asked for it! "

And without warning, he grabbed Credence by the arms before pulling him into the water. It was awfully cold, but the young man was far too happy to care. When he came to the surface, he took the opportunity to throw water in Gellert's face, and like two children, they started playing, laughing out loud, kissing often. Then suddenly Grindelwald shouted to Percival:

"Don't you want to come Graves? You used to be funny! "

And again Credence had the impression that Gellert was trying to be cruel. Of course, he knew very well that the older one had suffered incredibly from his wife's adultery with Percival, but he didn't really like the squeaky, hurtful tone he took when he was talking to Graves. And as earlier in the day, this sensation was erased by Gellert's lips, this time on his mouth. Gellert hugged him tightly and then put his hands behind his thighs to be able to carry him. Credence put his legs around his waist and his arms around his neck, responding to his kiss, smiling against his lips.

A few yards away, he could neither hear Seraphina's condescending sigh nor see Percival's strangely bright and sad eyes as he watched the scene.

* * *

"Gellert? "

"Credence. "

"The thing you have just done to me is currently punishable by law in many countries. " the younger one joked.

Gellert had a small amused laugh. They were both lying in the large bed in their hotel room, slowly recovering from their climax, embracing each other.

"That's a big part of why I love America! " the blond man smiled.

Credence giggled, huddling a little more against Grindelwald's shoulder. The young Jones felt incredibly happy and he had a strong belief that this feeling would last forever. He placed a tender kiss on Gellert's neck, savoring the sensation of his skin against his own. Then, taking his courage in both hands, he ventured to ask:

"Gellert, do you love me? "

"Shut up or I'll do it again. " the other one gently threatened.

The idea of reliving the ardor and the passion of their last sexual experience was really not to displease him. Gellert was really good with his hands... And not only with his hands for that matter... So after a little laugh, Credence repeated:

"Do you love me? "

"All right Jones, you asked for it! "

Credence burst out laughing as Gellert disappeared under the sheets, leaving a multitude of kisses on his chest, his belly, his thighs. The night outside was already well advanced, and the young man wished that the day would never dawn. He would have liked him and Gellert to keep this cocoon of love and warmth for a long time, that nothing would change, that the rest of their lives would be spent in this hotel room, far from MACUSA's problems, hidden from everyone, living only to make each other happy.

But his prayers were not heard and in the morning Credence woke up alone in the crumpled sheets. Lost, he sat down in the bed to discover Gellert, fully dressed, sitting on one of the chairs in front of him. And he wasn't wearing his hunter's outfit. Credence's breath stopped for a moment, and his heart began to drum in his chest. Something was wrong.

"I have to go back to New York. " Gellert announced.

Credence pulled the sheets up over his chest, trying as best he could to hide the effect the news was having on his morale. Everything was falling apart: the whole weekend with Grindelwald, the picnic, the meeting with the parents. Everything was falling apart and he couldn't figure out how to react.

"Why? " he asked in a small voice.

"A last-minute meeting..." Gellert sighed, passing a hand over his face, visibly exhausted.

It was the first time since the beginning of their relationship that Grindelwald had to go back to work during weekend. Usually he always made his meetings and files wait until Monday.

"On a Saturday? "

"It's not my decision, Credence. "

He seemed irritated, as if he hadn't slept well and that the day had started in the worst possible way. And maybe it had, but it felt like a cold shower to the youngest, especially after yesterday and the fabulous night they had spent.

"We could just quickly go to the picnic and leave right away. " he suggested.

" We? Credence, you're not going to miss this annual picnic so you can come back with me! " he replied with a tense smile.

"But we could spend a minute there and then... "

"I can't! " he interrupted him. "I have to be in town in four hours. "

That soon? They only had an hour left together at the most? Credence looked down at his fingers playing with the sheet. He felt like crying, and he hated the impression that Gellert was just looking for excuses to avoid meeting his parents. Maybe it was his fault, maybe Credence had tried to move too fast. Was it really so strange to want to introduce his boyfriend to his parents after more than two months?

"Listen Gellert, if you've changed your mind, about me and about the presentation to my parents, you can tell me. I'll understand. Because honestly, the next launch isn't until next month and I really don't see what's so important for you to go back to work like that. "

"No, of course you don't!" cried the other one.

Credence was slightly startled, never having heard Gellert raise his voice before today. The elder one stood up, starting to pace, visibly angry now as he said:

" Because you haven't the faintest idea of the shit the publishing house is in! You live on your little cloud! You walk around in your high-fashioned clothes and tight trousers, and you make a good impression with your little press releases and your silly smiles! While I have to deal with the British who come in to try to close down the company, for fuck's sake! "

Credence felt like he'd been slapped in the face. Grindelwald had always been incredibly calm with him, never disrespected him and tried most of the time to make him smile. He had never experienced that unpleasant intonation that sent a shiver up Credence's spine.

Gellert seemed to realize the condition of the younger one, because he let a long sigh pass through his lips before sitting down next to him. He put his finger under his chin to raise his face, waiting for Credence to look at him.

" Sorry... " he apologized. "Sorry Credence, I'm behaving like the last of the assholes. "

Then he put a tender kiss on his lips. Every trace of his outburst had disappeared. Credence gave him a little smile, to hide the fact that he had felt hurt. Everyone had the right to make mistakes, didn't they? Gellert ran a hand through the youngest's hair before saying:

" I'll send a car to pick you up at the end of the afternoon, okay? If you're going to travel alone, I'd rather you do it in style. "

Credence tried to smile again, but it must have looked more like a grimace as Gellert had a sad look on his face. The blond man leaned over to the travel bag next to the bed and pulled out the headset with the rabbit ears that Credence had bought for his disguise. He placed it on his head, looking at it with a tender gaze.

"You're really cute, babe! " he said.

Credence had a small laugh. Gellert suddenly captured his lips, in a deep kiss, smiling against his mouth:

"You're actually terribly sexy, and I think I'm going to capture you one last time before I have to go back to New York, my little bunny. "

Credence's laughter echoed through the room as the two men disappeared under the sheets again. After all, meeting his parents could wait, it was only a postponement, right?

* * *

Despite all the self-confidence he had shown in agreeing to dress up as a Playboy bunny, Credence was now all too aware of the transparency of the pink nightie and lingerie he was wearing. Nag had encouraged him to dress like this, relying on the fact that Gellert would be with him in any case. But now Credence was alone in front of the Goldsteins' big mansion and suddenly felt very uncomfortable.

 _There's no point in panicking! Everyone will be in disguise! Besides it won't last long, the car will be there in three hours._ He reassured himself. Swallowing with difficulty, correctly placing his rabbit ears back on his head, he forced himself to move forward. He was readjusting his lace bustier when he arrived in front of the guests.

And **_Oh. MY. GOD_**. Nobody was in disguise! It was a joke, wasn't it? It couldn't have been reality, he was in the middle of a nightmare. Credence felt himself blushing violently and he felt his stomach contract so violently that he wanted to puke. Mary approached him, visibly shocked by the way he was dressed.

" Oh my God, Credence, nobody told you? " she wondered.

Obviously not…

"No... Why... Why isn't anyone in costume? " he babbled.

Tina's mother took off her jacket so she could put it on the young man's shoulders. It didn't hide much, but Credence still appreciated the attention. Mary shook her head and said :

"Your mother had to tell you that we've given up the idea of disguise," she sighed.

"She must have forgotten... "

Perfect, he was going to make a fool of himself again in front of everyone. Putting on Mary's jacket properly, Credence let her guide him through the guests, pushing away Mr Lucas' wandering hands, which she threatened never to invite again if he continued to annoy the young man.

Credence tried to ignore Seraphina's mockery and Percival's strange look at him. The day could not have been worse... He would have liked to disappear. Why not hide in a rabbit hole, it was quite appropriate, wasn't it? Mrs. Goldstein, in her kindness, led him a little way away, behind a big tree, where Charles Jones had taken refuge since the beginning of this picnic.

Even though his father was surprised by his appearance, he made no comment and simply welcomed his son in a comforting embrace. After thanking Mary, Credence sat down next to his father, willingly accepting the cigarette Charles offered him. It was at this point that the young man noticed that his father was disguised as a hunter. After a puff of nicotine, he said:

"Didn't she warn you either? "

"No, she didn't. " his father sighed. "And Mary told me she wouldn't even come today. "

His voice broke over the last words. Credence turned to see that Mr Jones was on the verge of crying. He put one hand on his shoulder.

"Oh Dad, I'm so sorry. But maybe things will work out. "

"I don't know... I don't know, Credence. And I'm not sure I want to see her again right now. " he confessed.

"But you still love her... Don’t you ? "

"What difference does it make? What's the point if it's just so that she can forget her family as soon as a clown smile at her? "

And he wasn't entirely wrong... Since Henrietta had left with Julian, it was as if she had forgotten the rest of her life. She was answering less and less to Credence's messages, and she had never missed one of Mary's picnics before today.

This day was nothing like Credence had hoped for... After a slight pressure on his father's shoulder, the young man stood up and told him he was going to get them something to eat. He wasn't sure he could swallow anything, but his father obviously needed to eat something consistent, judging by his slender face.

Credence did his best to move forward with his chin up, as if the mocking or shocked looks of his parents' friends didn't bother him more than that. Near the buffet, Mary was serving pieces of chicken. He walked towards her, only later noticing that he was exactly behind Viviane’s son. _Mercy, make sure he doesn't make any remarks_. he thought. 

"Ah Credence! " Mrs. Goldstein smiled. "Your boyfriend couldn't come? That's a pity. "

"Yes, he was called by work. "

"What a surprise... " Percival grumbled.

Credence gave him a nasty look. He was really not in the mood for that kind of sentence and his patience was on the verge of exploding. Before he could say anything, Mary spoke again:

"What a shame he couldn't make it. What's his name again? Geoffrey? Greyson? "

"Gellert. " Percival replied coldly.

"Oh, he's a friend of yours, Percy? " she wondered with a smile.

"Absolutely not. "

His tone was so dry that even Mrs. Goldstein, who was always in such a good mood, seemed unsettled. She frowned, filling the plates that Graves was handing her, before saying:

"In any case, I hope he's good enough for our little Credence. "

"To this I think I can answer with confidence: **_absolutely not_**. "

He was going too far, he really exceeded the limits of young Jones' patience and kindness. Who did he think he was, that moron Percival Graves? And how dare he make such a remark after what he had put Gellert through ? Credence clenched his jaw and shot Viviane's son with his eyes, and replied in a dry tone:

"I'm sure he could say exactly the same thing about you, especially knowing what you've done. "

His sentence seemed to have the effect of a slap, and Graves took the blow with difficulty. His face lost all color as he stared at Credence with round eyes. He opened and closed his mouth several times before he ventured to ask:

"I beg your pardon? "

"I think you know exactly what I mean. "

The surprise and suffering associated with Credence's sentences soon gave way to something else on Percival's face. A sort of sad resignation, and without knowing why, the young man suddenly felt a terrible urge to apologize and withdraw what he had just said. But before he could open his mouth again, Graves passed along to go to Seraphina a little further away.

"Well, that was awkward... " Mary confessed.

And Credence couldn't agree more.

* * *

The return to New York was done in silence. Credence had reached the car sent by Gellert with an eagerness surely a little too visible. But neither his father nor Mary would hold it against him, he knew that. He had kept Mrs. Goldstein's waistcoat and his father had given him his long coat so that he could hide his little outfit. Credence played distractedly with the rabbit's hears, sighing several times. He had far too many thoughts clattering in his head, and it annoyed him a lot to see that Percival Graves was in the majority. The driver asked him where he should drop him off, and after some hesitation, Credence asked him to take him to Gellert's flat. He desperately needed to see a friendly face. 

No sooner had he rung the bell than Grindelwald opened the door, greeting him in a tight embrace and whispering that he had missed him. Credence let himself lean against him, closing his eyes, breathing in his fragrance. It was quite surprising; he didn't smell exactly as usual… Gellert gave him a kiss before tying their fingers and dragging him inside his flat.

"I'm sorry to barge in like this, it's just that... "

"Oh no, don't apologize!" Gellert interrupted him. "I just have a few more files to finish. Here's what I suggest: you go home, take a nice bath, and as soon as I've finished, I'll pick you up and we'll go to a French restaurant, what do you say? "

Yes, that was definitely what Credence needed. He nodded with a smile as Gellert leaned over to give him a kiss on his cheek. Then, suddenly, there was a door slamming in the apartment. Credence felt his stomach get knotted and his heartbeats accelerated.

"Is there someone with you? " he asked.

" Not that I am aware of, no. " Gellert smiled.

But Credence had spent a far too bad day to convince himself that it was just a breeze. Listening only to the bubbling jealousy that settled in the hollow of his stomach, he walked towards the bedroom door, which he opened abruptly. But nothing. The bed was empty and the sheets impeccably put on, as usual. The window was open and that was probably what had caused the door to slam. He felt incredibly ridiculous and burning tears formed in the corner of his eyes. He turned towards Gellert and apologized.

"No, it's all right, Credence. "he reassured him. " Look, you've had a really hard day, and I feel really bad about abandoning you this morning. "

"No, you don't have anything to blame yourself for, I'm the one who's going crazy. " Credence smiled nervously, still couldn’t get over his overly possessive reaction to a simple slamming door.

"Listen, babe, I'm almost done with what I wanted to do after that awful meeting. Just give me one more hour, and then I promise I'll come and get you. "

"It's OK, there's no problem. Take your time. " he said, stroking his cheek.

Credence stands on tiptoes to drop a quick kiss on Gellert's lips. Then the blond man walked him back to the door, giving him back his travel bag which he had taken care to bring back this morning to avoid Credence being bothered at the picnic. They kissed again, and as the young man stepped away from Gellert, ready to leave, he noticed a pink woman's jacket hanging on the coat rack.

He stared at it for a long time, as if his brain couldn't process the information. Then Grindelwald noticed what he was looking at and he turned dangerously pale. Without waiting another second, Credence rushed inside the flat, ignoring Gellert who was calling him. He opened the bedroom door and went to the small bathroom next to it. And there, on the edge of the bathtub, completely naked, sat a beautiful young woman.

If Credence managed to remain standing, it was at the cost of his heart crashing against the cold parquet floor. He had to remember how to breathe, how to overcome the pain. Why did Gellert do this? Why did he break everything like that? Why did he do this to him?

Not to cry, not to burst into tears in front of Gellert, not to burst into tears in front of her.

"Credence, this is Ruby from the London office. Ruby, this is Credence. "

Gellert's insecure voice seemed to come to him from another planet. Credence felt like he was about to faint. It was too painful, far too hurtful...

"Sugar, I thought you told me you chose to use him because he was pretty!" Ruby laughed, in the most hurtful voice.

His eyes blurred with tears, his heart torn into a thousand pieces, his breath aching, Credence ran away, leaving behind him the few months of happiness he had shared with Gellert Grindelwald.

It was a nightmare; it couldn't be otherwise. He was going to wake up two months earlier in the arms of the man of his life, to tell him that he was in love, to tell him that everything would be all right. He was trembling like a leaf, in the grip of an unprecedented anxiety attack. His lungs were burning terribly, so he had to stop running. And there, on the black pavement of the street, Credence fell to his knees, weeping in the midst of a thousand people who were indifferent to his misery.

_Everything had been shattered in an instant..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's it, Gellert has become an asshole again... He didn't stay charming for long ^^ I hope you liked this chapter, see you soon for the rest ^^


	5. Back to square one

Credence had literally had to drag himself to his flat, once his eyes had been unable to cry anymore and he was in that awkward state that made him feel like he was outside his body. He felt emptied of all his strength, as if he had been stripped of all purpose in life. He didn't want to call his friends, unable to face the compassionate glances of the Goldstein twins, especially knowing that they were each spinning the perfect love, let alone hear Nagini's pessimistic speeches about romance.

After locking his door, he took off his coat and then his clothes before going to his room and letting himself fall, completely naked and vulnerable, onto his bed. He wrapped himself in the heavy blanket, closing his eyes, praying for a dreamless sleep. And in less than a breath, he felt sucked into nothingness.

Credence would have liked never to wake up, to remain forever in the arms of darkness, rocked by the floating of his being in the abyss. But as always, the angels turned a deaf ear, and Credence woke up naked, wounded, lost and irrevocably alone in his bed. After giving his puffy eyes a few seconds to get used to the light, he left the sheets and went into his bathroom. He ran himself a hot bath, slipping into it with a certain appeasement but unable to get the slightest satisfaction out of it.

He stayed in the water for a long, long time, staring at the ceramic tile wall with an empty gaze, far too exhausted to bring himself to cry again. Gellert was not wonderful, he was not honest, he was not caring, he was not the man of his life... He had deceived him, he had cheated on him. And Credence wasn't sure he wanted to know how long the story with Ruby had been going on.

 _Ruby._.. What a stupid name! And he knew what the hell he was talking about! His name was _Credence_! That woman was so perfect with her dreamy body, her long blond hair, her well-defined breasts and her endless legs, that Credence almost felt nauseous.

He finally left the bathtub when the water was too cold and wrapped himself in a towel before going back to his room. Desperate times call for desperate measures: he put on his long white T-shirt that he had carefully put away in the " _throwaway_ " box last January. Back to square one. No, back to _square minus one in the disgusting half-basement of his crappy life_. Yes, it fitted the situation better. Bye, bye good resolutions…

Credence rummaged through his cupboards in his kitchen to take out the four bottles of red wine (all opened with Gellert, by the way) before bringing them into his living room and wallowing in his sofa. He turned on the television and zapped for a moment before stopping to watch a romantic teenage comedy. He served himself many drinks, too many, commenting on the actions of the characters, raging against the stupidity of the main character before breaking into tears at the final love confession. _They were so cute!_

At the end of the film, he turned off his television before connecting his phone to the speaker. He took great care to ignore the messages he had received and in a gesture worthy of the greatest drama queen, he clicked on the playlist entitled: **Break up**. He hummed the first tracks while continuing to drink, rediscovering songs from his childhood such as " _All good things come to an end_ " by Nelly Furtado or the unavoidable " _Wrecking Ball_ " by Miley Cyrus, as well as " _Bleeding love_ " by Leona Lewis and " _Torn_ " by Natalie Imbruglia.

After a while, he threw himself into an approximate karaoke of " _We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together_ ", indifferent to the fact that he was certainly driving his downstairs neighbor crazy. It was a beautiful day outside, and if Credence was annoying him, all he had to do was go out for a walk! He was in the midst of a love crisis, for God's sake! And he didn't even have ice cream and whipped cream! _What a fucking life_! He even allowed himself to shout out the lyrics of Pink's " _So What_ ", taking an umbrella as his guitar.

He sang for a long time, until his throat hurt, and the wine suddenly made him want to vomit. He rushed to the toilet, emptying his entire stomach before taking a quick shower and dragging himself back to bed. He buried his face in the pillow that Gellert used to sleep on, breathing in his scent, before bursting into tears. Then he sadly let himself cry until his eyes closed on their own.

And Monday morning came, even more painful because of the terrible hangover that Credence had. He forced himself to go to work, repeating to himself that if he didn't go today, he would probably never go back. He chose his clothes at random, opting for an old black jumper and jeans, far away from the Burberry jackets and other Yves Saint Laurent shirts he had been wearing for several months. He poured himself a large cup of coffee, swallowed it whole before carefully brushing his teeth and then set off, forgetting his telephone next to the speaker.

He must have looked miserable judging by the worried look Gemma gave him when he sat behind his computer. He thanked her mentally that she didn't ask him any questions, greeting him with a compassionate smile.

Credence forced himself not to look in the direction of Gellert's office. He was far too afraid that he would cry again if he saw his big, dark eyes. He immersed himself in work, concentrating on his files, moving much faster than when he was distracted by a rose or a smile. The ringing of his work phone startled him abruptly. He picked it up and his heart pounded violently when he recognized Gellert's voice.

''Credence, can you please come to my office. ''

He would have liked to send him away, to tell him that he didn't have to meet his expectations as they must have been already fulfilled, and that if he was looking for a distraction, Ruby would most likely be on the lower floor. But Credence just hung up without a word, taking on himself, clenching his jaw, picking up a few files before heading to his boss's office. He entered after knocking lightly against the glass door.

Grindelwald was leaning against his desk, his shoulders slumped, looking sad. He looked miserable, far from his usual self-confidence. But at the same time he didn't seem to be in any particular pain, as if this was inevitable and fate had brought them there. But Credence knew that fate had nothing to do with it, it wasn't inevitable destiny that had led them to that fateful moment, but Gellert's _fucking cock_!

 _Why? Why did you do it?_ Credence thought.

The young man closed the door behind him, clearing his throat to give himself some composure, before opening one of his files and saying in a neutral tone:

''We had... We had excellent feedback on the last campaign proposed to the test group and on the quiz. And with the planned radio interviews for our authors, I think that... ''

''Credence... '' Gellert tried.

''I think we could have more conclusive results if we... ''

''Credence please, don't do that..." he interrupted him, in an almost begging voice.

Credence bit the inside of his cheek to stop himself from crying. He blinked several times to chase away the fresh tears before raising his eyes to Gellert.

'' What?" he asked coldly.

Grindelwald straightened up, running a hand through his blond hair, visibly searching for his words.

''I feel... terribly bad... '' he confessed. ''The thing is, Ruby and I... Well, you know... ''

''No, you're going to have to enlighten me on this subject... '' he replied dryly, suddenly closing the file he was holding.

''The truth, Credence, is that we are the same, you and I! We are two men, in a certain situation, looking for the right time and the right person to commit ourselves completely and we find it really complicated. And Ruby... Ruby is the motivation I was missing, I think. Maybe it's because she's European, or maybe it's her self-confidence and because she's so... well... Beautiful, you know? ''

Credence felt like someone was having fun dancing on the remains of his broken heart. His hands tightened around the sheets of paper, his knuckles turning white. All color must have left his face as he suddenly felt like throwing up. But Gellert just walked towards him and continued:

''We understand each other completely, she and I, we're on the same wavelength... ''

''But... But you just met her. She arrived from London on Saturday. ''

And there it was the worst of it. Worse than knowing that he had been deceived and that Grindelwald was leaving him for this Ruby. As he had feared, the affair with this woman was not from the previous weekend, and he guessed it from the sorry pout that the older one displayed.

''Oh... Oh my God, I am so stupid... You didn't just meet her, this is something that has been going on for months... '' Credence said, realizing aloud one of the worst possible scenarios.

''Two years, actually. We spent time together every time I went to London. ''

''Including since you've been with me... ''

It wasn't a question, just a cold and brutal realization that Gellert had been lying to him from the very first day, even before they were "together".

''Yes," the blond man murmured.

A sad laugh passed the young man's lips. He felt like he was suffocating. And without him being able to hold them back, a few tears rolled down his cheeks. He wiped them away angrily with the back of his hand. He didn't want to look weak, let alone in front of Grindelwald, who looked at him with that unbearable expression of pity, as if Credence were a little bird with crumpled wings.

''Perfect... '' Credence said. ''It's even better than I expected... ''

Gellert moved in his direction, as if he wanted to take him in his arms, but Credence raised his hand to wave him to stop, clutching the files to his chest, taking a step back to make sure the older one wouldn't touch him. Grindelwald didn't insist, running a hand through his hair again. He sighed before saying, still with that misplaced pout of empathy on his face:

''Shit, I'm sorry. And there's no gentle way to tell you, so I'm going to tell you now: we're engaged. ''

 ** _Bam_**. Credence was convinced that someone had just hit him with the most awful violence possible. This announcement was even more brutal for two reasons: the first was that Gellert was even more false and deceitful than the young man could have imagined, and the second, much more terrible, was that from the very first day, from the very first message, he had been " _the other_ ". It wasn't Ruby the " _second relationship_ ", the one that was hidden, the one that was not acceptable, the one that took place behind closed doors and when you're sure no one is looking. It was him. It was him from the beginning.

''You... You... You're getting married? '' he mumbled.

''Yes… ''

''Oh my God... Oh my God, I think I'm going to puke. ''

He was forced to lean against the door worried that he might collapse. His vision was blurred, and he was in so much pain in his soul that he was convinced that if he didn't run away very quickly, he would lose consciousness in front of Gellert. And that was the last thing he wanted.

''I am so, so terribly sorry Credence. I know I screwed up, and I blame myself. ''

 _Liar! Filthy liar! If you really felt guilty, you would never have put me through such a thing!_ he thought.

How could he? How could he have put him through it? Everything seemed so perfect! Had he been sincere at some point, or had Credence just been a distraction?

''There's one thing... One thing I'd like to know, Gellert. '' he said in a trembling voice.

''I'm listening to you. ''

Credence linked his gaze to Grindelwald’s eyes. The older man had no idea how much energy and courage this simple gesture cost him. He swallowed with difficulty in an attempt to reduce the painful ball at the back of his throat, and then he asked:

''Why did you do this to me? Why did you act like that when you yourself have suffered this kind of betrayal? Why did you do to me what your wife and Percival did to you? ''

''Credence, that has nothing in common. It's not as if you and I were something serious, it wasn't meant to last a lifetime. ''

Now he really wanted to throw up. He had to leave, he couldn't stay another minute in that room, let alone with Gellert's atrocious look on his face.

''Credence... '' whispered the older man.

''I... I have to go. I think I'm going to take a few days off. ''

''Credence, please. ''

''Everything is ready for the current files; I'm sending you my return date tonight. ''

Then, without a glance back, he left the office. His legs and hands were shaking and he was sure that if he didn't leave right away he would explode, so heartbroken he was. Ignoring the questioning glances of his colleagues, Credence began to collect a few things, dropping his files several times, his fingers unable to hold anything properly. A tender hand rested on his shoulder and he almost jumped back towards Gemma. She gently stroked his cheek before helping him to finish tidying up his desk.

''The files... The files for... '' he babbled.

''I'll take care of it, Credence. '' She smiled at him.

He nodded, unable to express his gratitude out loud. Gemma took his coat and helped him put it on before putting her arm under his and accompanying (or rather supporting) him to the elevator. She stayed with him until the doors opened, and after a last, almost maternal caress on his cheek, she let him go. Credence suddenly felt sorry for having so often considered her as a simple colleague, Gemma was definitely someone who would have deserved more of his time and friendship.

Credence returned home, completely lost and totally destroyed. He was like a ghost wandering through the streets he knew so well. Finding his phone by the television, he noticed Queenie's missed calls. But he really didn't have the strength to discuss the situation with her, so he simply write the message : " _I'm still alive, I need to be alone_." And the young Goldstein just replied, " _I'm here if you need me, honey. I love you, darling_."

He needed a drink. No, he needed to _empty all the vodka stocks in the grocery shop to forget even his name_. Yeah, it sounded like a _pretty good program_. Without further ado, he slipped his phone into his pocket before going back outside. In the small shop, he quickly placed two bottles of vodka in his basket before adding a bag of apples to clear his conscience. He was lost in thought, waiting his turn to pay, when a deep voice brought him back to reality:

"Looks like the apples didn't work. "

 _Oh, please, not him... not today..._ he thought. Credence closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath to keep his calm before turning back to Percival. He was about to think the man was a real stalker! The young man clenched his teeth, quickly paying for his purchases, before replying with a wicked smile:

"No, not really... "

" I don't see the point of going back to it then... "

Ok. There he literally reached the limits of his patience. Credence turned entirely towards Viviane's son before exclaiming:

"Don't you have anything better to do? Don't you have anything better to do on a Monday afternoon in New York than to doubt my diet? Is your life as sad as that? Don't you have a moron to defend or a useless plea to prepare? "

Percival had a slight backward movement, frowning, more unsettled than angry. 

"No need to be rude." he replied.

"Leave me the fuck alone! If I want to let myself starve to death, I don't see how that's your problem! The fact that our mothers are friends doesn't give you the right to judge me, and it's obviously not enough to make you a good person! "

"Not as good as Gellert apparently. "

It was Credence's turn to step back, as if Graves had just slapped him. The young man felt burning tears rolling down his cheeks, and he felt all the anger he had been keeping locked up since Saturday rise up in a single wave. The rest of the shop was staring at them, but he didn't care. In a sudden gesture, Credence punched Percival in the shoulder before shouting:

"Fuck you! Fuck you! And you know what? Maybe I only want to eat apples to keep my skeletal body because I'm a fucking depressive who thinks he's a fashion designer! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go feed myself some low-calorie food and hopefully it'll help me forget one of the worst days of my life! "

He retrieved his bags, turned his heels, ran almost to the exit, determined to never see that jerk again! (or daylight...). But before he could move away from the entrance of the shop, Percival put a hand on his shoulder.

"Credence, I... " he tried.

Credence moved away sharply. The contact had almost burned him. He was furious with Graves, furious to think that Gellert might have taken revenge on Percival and his wife through him, furious to realize that Percival had been right in saying that Grindelwald did not deserve him, furious that all the remarks he had made to him since their meeting literally stuck to his skin.

He didn't want Graves's pity, he didn't want that sad, glossy look, he didn't want that compassionate face, he didn't want it! He just wanted him to get out of his life and leave him in peace!

"Buzz off! Leave me the fuck alone! There's nothing worse than looking so fucking miserable in front of you! "

And without bearing for a further instant Graves's worried expression, Credence left at full speed for his flat.

As soon as he had closed the door, he let himself slide against it, bursting into tears, cowering on his entrance carpet. He thought he had already cried his eyes out, but he was obviously mistaken. How did he manage to have so much water in reserve when he had only been drinking alcohol since yesterday? He couldn't tell how long he had been standing there like an empty shell, his rib cage shaken with interminable tears. Maybe a few minutes, or maybe hours... Maybe a lifetime...

His phone buzzed in his coat pocket, and after taking a deep breath to try to calm down, he picked it up without bothering to check the number, thinking it would be Queenie.

"Hello? "

"My darling, are you all right? Queenie called me... "

It was his father. Charles seemed really worried. Of course Queenie had called him... He had told her that he needed to be alone, but she apparently didn't like that answer. Credence tried to talk, but his words got stuck in his throat as he started crying again.

"Oh Credence... Do you want to come and spend a few days at home? No unpleasant discussions or bad encounters in prospect, just a week between father and son with lots of popcorn and stupid action movies. "

He hesitated for a while. Then his eyes fell on his shopping bags. All things considered, alcohol and apples might not be such a good program... And besides, they could support each other with Charles, as Henrietta continued her stupid romance with the other moron.

"Yes... Yes, I'd like that very much. " He finally said. 

His father seemed reassured to hear him accept.

"Do you want me to come and pick you up? " he suggested.

"No, I'll take the train... "

"OK, you tell me when you will arrive and I will be at the station this time, I promise. Come home my darling. "

Yes, home... A return to the roots, far from Gellert, far from Percival, far from his broken heart and the crowded streets of New York. He needed it terribly.

"Thank you, Dad. " he murmured.

* * *

As he got off the train, he was greeted by the reassuring embrace of his father, who let him cry against his shoulder and whispered to him that everything would be all right in the end. Then he had brought him home, passing his hand over his cheek at times to wipe away some of his son's tears.

Charles didn't ask him what had happened, preferring to give him time to calm down and feel safe. He had prepared a hot chocolate for him, the one with baby marshmallows in it, Credence's favorite as a child. Then he wrapped him up in a soft plaid before offering to sit with him in the living room. He took a seat on the sofa while Charles sat in one of the large armchairs.

Credence had remained silent, sometimes trying to smile when he noticed his father's eyes on him. But most of the time he would simply get lost in staring at the television screen without paying much attention to what was happening on it. At some point Charles changed channels and they came across Henrietta's smiling face accompanied by the unbearable Julian,

"It looks ridiculous! " Credence declared coldly.

"Exactly! Exactly! " his father exclaimed.

Charles had opened his arms wide, in a gesture far too theatrical, and he was happy to see that his action had snatched a small laugh from his son. After a few moments, Credence asked in a small voice:

"Dad, why did you adopt me? I mean, why me? "

Charles seemed surprised by this question. He ran a hand through his hair, thinking about what he was going to say, before turning off the television. Then he put his eyes on Credence's pale face, and answered:

"When we learned that we couldn't have a child, your mother and I decided to take the steps to adopt a kid. Your mother wanted to adopt a baby, I didn't really know if I was capable of looking after a small infant. I was just terrified of becoming a parent. We visited several orphanages, but I don't know, I guess I was waiting for some kind of trigger, some kind of parental love at first sight, you know? "

Credence nodded, bringing his knees under his chin, clutching his legs, listening attentively to his father. Charles had a little smile as he recalled their first meeting.

"And then I saw you. " he said. "You were so small, so fragile, huddled in the shadows. You were sitting on the garden steps and crying. Then I came to you and I asked you why you were so sad and you said, " _I think I killed a ladybird. I just wanted to see it fly_ ". You were adorable, with your big black eyes full of tears, and your trembling hands that couldn't have hurt a fly. And I don't know why, I just knew at that moment that I had to take care of you, that I had to be strong for you, that I had to protect you. "

And that's what he had done. He had always been there for Credence, supporting him in all his decisions, backing him up in his studies, encouraging him in his choices, sending all those who had had the misfortune to comment on his sexual orientation away. Credence could not have imagined a better father, even if Charles' calm sometimes bordered on indifference.

" When they explained to us your past, what this... this "woman" had done to you, the beatings, the isolation, I was heartbroken. And Henrietta kept silent for a long time. She watched you and I chatting without saying a word for the rest of the afternoon. And then on the way home she asked me: " _Do you think he's going to love it_? "and I said, " _What_?" and she smiled at me and said, " _The room. Do you think Credence is going to love it? We're going to have to buy another bed for our son_.””

Credence felt tears rising in his eyes. He was moved and at the same time reassured to know that his parents had loved him from the first time they saw him. Charles stood up, sitting on the couch, before opening his arms to invite Credence to come against him. His son approached, resting his head on his shoulder, letting a few tears roll down his cheeks, while his father stroked his hair.

"Why is it so hard sometimes? " the young man asked.

Charles sighed a long breath. He seemed to have been asking himself this question a lot lately.

"Because life isn't a long, quiet river, but there's nothing stopping you from learning to sail or swim. And that's what you did, Credence. After the first few years of your life, you could have become so cold, suspicious or bad. But you managed to build yourself up and become such a bright and caring boy. "

He wasn't really sure about that... For the time being, he felt weak and pathetic.

"He left me... He cheated on me with a woman, and it hurts, dad. " He confessed in a sob.

Charles tightened his embrace around him, placing tender kisses on the top of his head. If he was furious with Gellert, Charles was sufficiently in control of his emotions to manage to hide it from his son. It would have been pointless to shout and promise that he was going to strangle him, and yet there was no lack of envy.

"Oh, darling, I know. But there is one thing you must know, my angel. If this fool isn't able to love you and accept you as you are, then it's his loss, not yours. You are a wonderful being Credence, and I am infinitely proud of you, you hear me? You have the most fabulous heart, you are intelligent, generous, kind and so much more. Don't let a little shit sink you. "

A small laugh passed Credence's lips. His father was never rude, he had never heard him say 'shit' in his life. He straightened up, wiping his cheeks with the back of his hands before saying, in an amused tone:

"Little shit? "

"Yes, like that asshole Gellert who thinks he can do anything. What a son of a bitch! "

"Dad, your language. "

"What ? You think that because I'm over sixty I'm no longer allowed to say "shit" or "asshole"? Fuck them all! "

Credence burst out laughing. Charles was right : _Fuck them all_ ! And that was the best thing to think about tonight. His father put the plaid back on his shoulders properly before getting up to go to the shelf where the DVDs were stored.

"Now, how about watching a very intellectual film like Armageddon. " he suggested, brandishing the film's cover.

Perfect! A perfect choice to relax and completely forget about brain function.

"I'd like that very much. " Credence said. 

"Great! I'll start the movie and you order the pizzas! "

In the end, Queenie had done well to call his father. This evening had done him the greatest good. He should think about thanking her next time he sees her. If he didn't forget…

* * *

Credence returned to New York four days later. He had spent a lot of time talking with his father, who encouraged him to change jobs if he no longer liked advertising for a publishing company. And to tell the truth, Credence really didn't want to work with Gellert anymore.

He would probably miss Gemma, but he could continue to see her outside of work, this time as a true friend. Once he got to his flat, he took care of putting it back in order and washing it thoroughly. Then he threw away everything he had left of Gellert: a few T-shirts and a Polaroid photo. He was finishing cleaning his bathroom when the doorbell rang.

He opened the door and came face to face with a huge bouquet of irises. They had a light pink tint that Credence did not remember having seen before. Or maybe he had... Was it a flower from his childhood? Then the delivery man's head appeared on the side and Credence hurried to get the flowers to help him. The man thanked him warmly, asked him to sign a piece of paper and handed him a small golden envelope. Then he turned around, leaving Credence alone with the irises and the letter. He placed the bouquet on his coffee table before opening the envelope.

It contained a simple little white paper on which was written in handwritten letters an extract from his favorite poem by Edgar Allan Poe:

_Take this kiss upon the brow!_

_And, in parting from you now,_

_Thus much let me avow -_

_You are not wrong, who deem_

_That my days have been a dream;_

_Yet if hope has flown away_

_In a night, or in a day,_

_In a vision, or in none,_

_Is it therefore the less gone?_

_All that we see or seem_

_Is but a dream within a dream._

Then, underneath, in a less elaborate writing, it was inscribed: " _I know that it may seem strange, and that you don't realize it yet, but I tell you knowingly: someday this pain will be useful to you._ "But there was no name, no signature.

Few people knew of his interest in poetry, let alone Poe. He only shared this passion with his father, who had introduced him to this literature. So, with a smile, Credence sent a message to his father: " _Thank you Dad_ ". And a few seconds later, Charles simply replied: " _You're welcome._ " He then placed the flowers in a vase and returned to his household.

Towards the end of the day, the doorbell rang again. Credence was, at that moment, sitting on his sofa, eating an apple with honey and writing down his latest adventures in his diary. He had barely unlocked the door when Tina entered his flat like a tornado.

"Why didn't you call me?" she cried, visibly panicked.

"Good evening to you too, Tina. " He smiled as he closed the door behind him, leaning back against it.

"I had to find out from your father what happened! Why? Why Credence? I was worried to death! "

Credence immediately lost his smile when he noticed how freaked out she was and that she was on the verge of crying. He walked towards her and he didn't have time to open his arms completely as she hung around his neck, clutching him tightly, almost cutting off his breath. She cried against his shoulder, and Credence gave her back her embrace, resting his cheek against her head.

"I'm the worst best friend... I'm a super loser... I should have been there at the picnic, I should have asked you to introduce me to Gellert, I should have been there! "

"Tina, you didn't do anything wrong. "

"No! Because I didn't do anything! I'm sorry Cree, I'm so sorry I didn't protect you. "

"I'm fine Tina, and I don't blame you at all! " he reassured her.

"I love you Credence... "

He tightened his arms around her, closing his eyes. Tina had always been there for him, she really had nothing to blame herself for. And besides, he was the one who had walked away, he was the one who preferred to listen to Gellert when he asked him to spend evenings with him, rather than with his friends. He could never blame Tina, she was one of the most wonderful people in his life.

"I love you too Tina," he whispered.

She stepped aside enough to wipe her wet cheeks, mocking herself with a grimace. Credence laughed softly, giving her a few seconds to calm down completely. Then Tina tiptoed to put butterfly kisses on his forehead and cheeks, making the young man giggle, before she took him in her arms again.

"Do you want me to kill him? " she suggested. "Nagini had a great idea including a dick tattoo on his forehead. "

"Does Nag know about it? "

Tina walked away, giving him a sorry pout. But Credence didn't really hold it against her. An evening with his friends might be the best idea for a return to normal life.

"Yes, she should be here in a few minutes. " she confessed. "I've warned Queenie and Jacob too, but they already have other plan, a thing with Jacob's parents, I think. "

Credence smiled at her to reassure her before putting a kiss on her forehead. And a few seconds later, heavy blows were dropped on his front door. Nagini in all her delicacy...

"What's this fucking asshole's address? " she said dryly when Credence opened the door.

Then, after a long, hilarious discussion about the thousands of different ways to assassinate Grindelwald (Nagini really had a vivid imagination, it was almost scary), the three friends ordered Chinese food together, opening the bottles of vodka that Credence had bought on Monday while starting a karaoke of " _Fuck you!_ "by CeeLo Green, changing the lyrics to match Credence's story.

_I see you driving 'round town with the man I love_

_And I'm like, "Fuck you" (ooh, ooh, ooh)_

_I guess my body in that jacket wasn't enough_

_I'm like, "Fuck you and fuck him, too."_

_Said, "If I was prettier, I'd still be with ya."_

_Ha, now ain't that some shit?_

_And although there's pain in my chest_

_I still wish you the best_

_With a "Fuck you" (ooh, ooh, ooh)_

They must have looked like a bunch of teenagers at a sleepover, but they didn't care. What mattered most were Tina's endless vocalizations, Nag's randomly adding vulgarities, Credence's hip movements, and the uncontrollable bursts of laughter that shook them at times. Credence was certain of one thing: _he had missed them terribly_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Percival still has to really work on his communication... And Gellert is really an asshole... But everything will be all right in the end, I promise! <3


	6. Happy progress and small inconveniences

_Weight : 137 lbs_

_Cigarettes: 30 per day (no one is perfect)_

_Alcohol: Friday and Saturday evenings with Tina and Nagini (the number of glasses is not important)_

At times like these, you had to face reality and leave behind the life you had led for several months. Emptying the entire refrigerator was not an option, especially when it was filled only with tomatoes and apples. So Credence had two choices:

  * to give up everything and accept his fate as a single man
  * or not.



And with the help and support of his friends and his father, Credence chose **_not_**. He wouldn't be defeated by some asshole and his stupid Barbie doll.

Instead, he decided to learn how to cook sushi and find a new job. He also took up sport again and forced himself to have a much more balanced diet, largely based on Japanese food. He went shopping with Queenie several times, forgetting to thank her for the phone call she had given to his father, until it didn't really make sense to thank her for that.

He was happy to see his friends again and to get over this difficult period. Of course, there were days that were harder than others, often accompanied by depressing songs, but he always managed to get through them.

Strangely enough, Percival did not make any appearances before him in the weeks that followed. Perhaps his crying attack had finally frightened him for good. And that was a good thing! At least, he hoped so...

After Credence's week off, Gellert had gone back to London for a whole month, freeing the young man from the fear of running into him or Ruby at work. And it was in this context that he started looking for an other job, this one in television. He was helped largely by his mother, who after hearing the news of his separation offered to help him, but also by Gemma, who made sure to finish his files and hide his absences when he had to go to a job interview.

Every time he asked her if she didn't mind, she answered: " _I won't say anything if you don't, and Gellert is a bastard! Screw him._ "

And so, at the beginning of July, he received a positive response from a small TV channel that was looking for a new presenter / journalist / host. He wasn't sure how he had managed to get the job, but it must have been because the woman he had met there had spent a good fifteen minutes discussing with him about "Sons of an illustrious father", one of the music bands he listened at the time.

And so, on the Monday after the news that he had been hired (and after the drinking weekend to celebrate), Credence came to Grindelwald's office with a smile on his face and announced his resignation.

Gellert had stared at him for a long time, probably expecting the younger one to tell him it was a joke. But no, Credence was very serious and incredibly determined. Pushing aside the letter of resignation in an angry gesture, his ex-lover told him:

"Come on, Credence! I know things are a bit... awkward now. But there's no reason for you to leave. "

"Actually, there is. " He smiled, proud of himself as he hadn't been for a long time. "I've been offered a job on television. "

Gellert frowned, his jaw tightened. His eyes shone with a new anger, as if he finally realized he no longer had any hold over Credence. He had lost him for good. _Well, good for you, you poor bastard_! the younger one thought.

"On television? " he repeated coldly.

"Yes, and they want me to start right away. So I'll have to leave in about, " he looked at the time on his phone, looking falsely surprised, "Five minutes. "

And without waiting for Grindelwald’s reaction, he got up, picked up his coat and headed for the door.

"Credence wait!" the other tried.

And seeing that the youngest was not listening to him and was opening the door of his office, he suddenly got angry, banging his hand flat on his desk and shouting:

"Credence Jones, you wait a minute! "

He immediately regretted raising his voice because all his employees turned in his direction. With an insecure smile, he stood up to approach Credence, trying to keep up appearances.

"Mr. Jones, you should know that your contract stipulates that you must give at least six weeks' notice for your resignation. "

Credence made a falsely sorry pout before answering:

"Ah, well, you know, Mr. Grindelwald... Given the company's situation and the pressure from the London office, I thought you could do without the boy who lives on his cloud and walks around in his high-fashioned clothes and tight trousers, and makes a good impression with his little press releases and silly smiles. "

Gellert froze for a moment, as if shocked to hear Credence use his own words against him. And the younger one took the opportunity to turn his heels and walk out of the office with the bay windows. He had not yet reached his desk when Grindelwald's voice called him again.

"Credence Jones! " he thundered.

Credence turned towards him, his teeth clenched together, raising his chin to give himself some poise. He wasn't afraid of Gellert, even less today than any other day before. Gemma left her chair to come and stand next to him, crossing her arms on her chest, giving Gellert a defiant look.

"Go on sir, everyone is listening to you! " she said. "And I really want to hear this, because if he gives an inch, I'll kick his ass myself. "

All eyes were on them, and the room fell into an unprecedented silence. In front of the sudden attention of his employees, Gellert cleared his throat, trying to lose his mask of anger to show a more professional face. He straightened himself up to have a little more presence before saying in a calm and measured tone:

"Well... Mr. Jones... I just wanted to tell you that there are great opportunities for talented people like you at MACUSA. "

Credence held his gaze with determination. He was about to break free, to turn the page, to change the chapter in his life. So he proudly, and with a provocative smile, said loud enough for his colleagues to hear him:

"Thank you Gellert, it's very nice to hear that I am not just an unimportant hobby and that my professional abilities are worth something to this company. But if my talent comes down to bearing your and your whore's face for the next ten years, I'd rather give Voldemort a blowjob! "

Grindelwald became paler than death, more furious than he had ever been. And Credence was incredibly happy to have succeeded in this exploit of having destabilized him in front of all his employees. There were many exclamations around them, some laughter, some whispering, but all visibly directed at making fun of Gellert. Gemma showed a big smile to Credence as the young man picked up his last things. Then, before leaving the room, he simply said :

"Well, well... Goodbye everyone! "

As Charles had said: _life is not a long quiet river, but nothing prevents you from learning to sail or swim._ And today Credence felt he had achieved it. Better than that: he had become a fucking fish in water!

* * *

The work at Ilvermorny TV was much more complex than Credence had expected. Even though he knew very well that he didn't really have a background in television and journalism, he at least expected to find his marks fairly easily. But he didn't. Everything was going at a phenomenal speed and he had a hard time keeping up. Especially with the pressure his boss had put on him to become the new face of " _little local news_ " presentation. How could one talk about **_little local news_** when the city in question was New York?

So, after just two months of training, much of which had consisted of drinking lots of coffee, reading journalism books and working overtime, Credence found himself having to present a figure skating competition at the Bryant Park rink. He, who had never worn an ice skate in his life, was about to experience something out of the ordinary ...

Luckily, Abernathy, the cameraman who accompanied him was really nice and did his best to prevent Credence from getting too stressed out. But how can you not get anxious when you are about to speak live in front of thousands of people? Or maybe more !

After having to readjust his make-up, at the request of his boss, Credence hastened to put on the ice skates that the rink had rented to him.

Damn, he was going to make a disaster, it was going to be a massacre...He knew it, his boss knew it, Abernathy knew it, even the queen of England **must have known about it**!

 _Breathe, Credence. Breathe... Everything's going to be all right, it's only a one minute and 30 second mission._ he thought.

Taking a deep inspiration, he joined the cameraman who told him they would be on the air in five minutes. And Credence's heart started beating in a disordered rush. He knew how to do this, he had even been able to ask the professional skater a few questions in advance. But between theory and practice there was like an ocean. Suddenly, Credence was no longer sure if he was a fish in water... Perhaps more like a fly trapped in a spider's web... Yes, it was more like that...

Especially since his boss absolutely wanted him to start his intervention by skating. Great idea! What a clever " _technique of journalistic dynamism_ "!

Just as Abernathy and the sound crew were in place and the cameraman waved to him, Credence took to the ice. And what had to happen happened: he lost his balance and ended up on his ass, slipping miserably for several yard. _My God, have you no pity?_

He got up as best he could, visibly lacking stability. And if he had been asked how the rest of the intervention went, he would have been unable to answer. His ears had buzzed furiously, and his face had become redder than ever... All he knew was that he had looked ridiculous again, but this time in front of thousands of people, their eyes glued to their screens.

Damn it, there would probably be people doing GIFs and memes on him. What a fucking life!

* * *

Needless to say, he was relegated to paperwork after that. He even wondered why he had not been dismissed. But he certainly didn't see himself asking his boss. Abernathy continued to come and greet him regularly, as if he was trying to be supportive. And so the month of September passed, the days following each other far too slowly for Credence's liking.

His weekends were punctuated either by his visits to his father, or by coffee on the run with his mother, or by evenings he didn't always remember the next day with Tina and Nagini.

Queenie and Jabob were completely devoted to their wedding preparations, which was due to take place in February, and Credence was extremely happy for them and really didn't want to disturb them.

Newton, or rather Newt, as Tina called him, had spent several memorable evenings with them. Tina had a hard time hiding her feelings for the redhead man, often blushing when Credence noticed her bright eyes and silly smile. Newt was a skilled zoologist, fully committed to the study and protection of animals, which often led him to go abroad. And although Tina missed him terribly in those times, Credence also knew very well that his best friend sometimes needed independence and to be alone. As a result, the Goldstein-Scamander couple had been working wonderfully well since last February.

At the beginning of October, Credence was happy to hear from Gemma. She had taken the time to write him a long message describing how empty the MACUSA office seemed without Credence and how inefficient the new woman, who had replaced him, had been. They had exchanged several messages, a few emails as well, and one thing led to another, Gemma had decided to invite him to her next dinner " _among friends_ ".

Credence had no idea who would be there, and to tell the truth, it scared him a little. He was afraid of coming face to face with a group of married thirty-somethings, all living extraordinary lives with blameless children. The worst thing would have been if the said children would have been there, shouting, pulling each other's hair, running around... In the end, he didn't know why he had said yes to this meal.

The day of dinner arrived, and Credence, in his usual anguish, had spent three hours in his bathroom trying to tie his hair into a proper bun. He had opted for a light blue suit jacket, black jeans and a turtleneck of the same color. He wasn't sure why he was so panicked, but the fact was that he was unable to calm his shaky hands.

Gemma lived in a charming house in Brooklyn on a quiet street. When Credence arrived in front of the big white door, he hesitated for a moment before ringing the bell. Well, now that he was there, he wasn't going to turn back. So he rang the bell.

A few seconds later, the smiling face of his former colleague appeared to him. She was much more refined than Credence was used to, and he found her incredibly beautiful. Gemma drew him into an embrace, repeating several times how happy she was to see him before inviting him in.

The interior of the house was finely decorated, in a clean, modern style that Credence had only seen in films. Gemma took his coat from him before leading the young man into the dining room. Around the large table there were at least six different couples and Credence felt his stomach get knotted. All eyes turned to him as his former colleague began the introductions.

"Well well! Everyone, this is Credence. Credence, this is Brian and Daisy, Ginny and Patrick, Louise and George, Elizabeth and William, Clary and Mark, and finally Percival and Seraphina, who you also know. "

 _Oh my God, why so much hatred?_ he thought. After their "altercation" at the grocery shop, Credence had never seen Percival again. It seemed as if the " _apple stalker_ ", as Nag called him, had grown tired of their unexpected encounters. Credence stood still for a moment, displaying a polite smile to everyone. But after that, he was really and inexplicably unable to avert his eyes from Graves's face. Percival seemed tired, thinner than last May and slightly paler too. But he was still incredibly attractive... Uh, unpleasant! Yes, unpleasant! _Focus Credence, focus._

"No bunny disguise tonight? " Seraphina mocked, suddenly bringing him back to reality.

He turned away from Graves's gaze, blushing slightly before answering:

"No, I'm afraid this kind of disguise is reserved for very special occasions. "

Gemma invited him to sit on the chair at the end of the table, between Brian and Percival, and the conversations around the table resumed. He had already met Brian at some of the events organized by MACUSA, and the man had not really made a good impression on him. He had found him stupid, self-centered, arrogant and malicious.

And for God's sake, he was far too aware of Graves's fragrance, far too aware of the shape of his shoulders, of his fingers resting on the table and around his glass of wine. Why did it matter? Why was his heart beating faster? Why was his stomach making loops?

Percival must have felt Credence's eyes on him, as he raised his dark and indecipherable irises towards the young man. Credence lowered his gaze, blushing dangerously before trying to hide his discomfort by drinking his glass of wine. What the hell was the matter with him?

"Hey, Credence, how's the love life? " Brian asked suddenly. "Are you still going out with that handsome publisher? "

Credence looked up at Gemma. Since when was his romantic life one of his colleague's topics of discussion? Did everyone present tonight already know about it? But Gemma was completely absorbed in her conversation with Louise (if Credence remembered her name correctly), so he simply replied :

"Oh er... No. "

"Ah, that's why it's always a very bad idea to have a relationship at work. "

Brian had a small laugh, soon followed by his wife's giggle. They were a good pair, the two of them, silly fools.

"Yes... indeed... " sighed Credence.

"You're going to have to hurry, you won't always be as fresh as the morning dew. The clock is ticking. "

Well, Ok, he had decided to be a pain in the ass apparently! Credence straightened up to give himself some composure before taking a sip of wine and saying in a cold tone :

"Yes, of course. Tell me, is it one in four marriages that end in divorce or one in three? "

"One in three! "

Percival's voice almost startled him. Credence turned towards him and Graves addressed him a compassionate gaze. Although he was grateful to him for answering his question, the intended effect of silencing Brian was lost.

"Seriously," Brian continued. "These days the streets are full of bachelors who can't even define whether they're attracted to men or women. They're nice people, but they're usually emotionally retarded and unable to have a serious relationship. "

Who did he think he was? And what did he know about it, anyway? How could Gemma be friends with such an idiot?! Credence clenched his fists on his thighs until his knuckles were white. And he noticed that, to his left, Percival seemed just as tense as he was, his jaw clenched. Before the young man could respond with a sharp sentence, Brian's wife Daisy asked:

"Yes, why is it so hard for homosexuals to have a serious relationship these days, Credence?"

 _Oh god…_ Credence felt himself blushing to the roots of his hair when all eyes turned to him. Gemma seemed confused and lost, probably because she hadn't followed the rest of the conversation at all. The dinner hadn't even really started yet and he was already feeling like running away. Credence cleared his throat, smiling nervously before answering:

"Uh... I don't know... I guess it doesn't help that we have to build traps to capture our mates and prevent them from running away to join the women. "

And to his left, Percival choked on his own saliva, blushing violently. Credence had not tried to unsettle him, but clearly his sentence had taken Graves by surprise. Seraphina cast a strange glance at Credence, she seemed furious at him. Fortunately for him, the silence that followed his intervention was broken by Gemma, who announced that she was going to bring the meat.

For the rest of the meal, Credence remained silent, happy that Brian finally left him in peace. He had his eyes on his knees, sometimes crossing Gemma's sorry gaze, to whom he smiled to reassure her. Graves was strangely silent too, playing distractedly with his salad without ever really eating it. He seemed preoccupied. Perhaps he had felt attacked by Credence's remark... _Damn it, why would it matter? You hate him, remember?_

Before Gemma offered to go to the lounge for coffee, Credence left the table saying he had a long day tomorrow and had to leave early. With a disappointed pout, his former colleague walked him back to the entrance. She gave him back his coat before saying :

"Credence, I'm really sorry for what happened earlier... "

"Gemma, you had nothing to do with it. " He smiled.

"Next time we'll have a meal or a coffee alone. "

"It would be my pleasure. "

And after a caress on his cheek, she returned to her guests while Credence waited for his taxi in the small hall. He sighed loudly, passing a hand over his face. What an evening... What months... What a **_fucking year_**!

"I really enjoyed your speech at the Bryant Park ice rink the other day. "

It was the second time tonight that Percival almost startled him. Credence closed his eyes, breathing deeply. He had to stay calm, there was no point in getting angry after all... What a wonderful way to start a conversation: to remind him of one of the most humiliating failures of his life... Credence turned to Graves, clenching his teeth, avoiding his dark gaze.

"Thank you... I guess... " he whispered.

"Didn't it work with Gellert Grindelwald? "

At that point it really took talent to be able to say such things... Credence shot him with his eyes before answering dryly:

"No, it didn't. "

He was really praying for his taxi to arrive as soon as possible, he really wanted to run away. Percival walked towards him, now standing close enough for Credence to notice the dark circles under his eyes. He might have been worried about him if Graves hadn't chosen to tell him :

"I'm very glad to hear that. "

And that was the straw that broke the camel's back, the drop that made his patience run out. Clutching his hands in two fists on either side of his body, repressing a desire to stamp his foot like a child, Credence became furious:

"Seriously, are you doing this on purpose? I mean, you always do the impossible to make me feel ridiculous, worthless and stupid every time you speak to me! Good news: You really don't need to bother! I already feel ridiculous, worthless and stupid most of the time. With or without ice skates on my feet. "

Percival had a small movement of retreat, as in this dispute at the grocery shop. He opened and closed his mouth several times, frowning slightly, visibly looking for his words. But fortunately, a bell rang announcing that Credence's taxi had arrived. Perfect!

"That's my taxi, good evening. " the young man said, quickly turning his heels.

But instead of letting him go, Percival spoke again:

"Credence, listen, I'm sorry if I... if I... "

Without really knowing why, Credence went back, crossing his arms, waiting for Graves to continue. As he seemed to be lost in thought again, Credence insisted, asking :

"What is it? What do you want to say ? "

"I don't think you're ridiculous at all, nor worthless, and even less that you're an idiot. I am aware that there are ridiculous things about you, and that your lack of self-esteem sometimes borders on the grotesque. Your mother is incredibly tiresome, and you are so anxious that you are unable to speak properly in public. Too often you let your emotions get the better of you without thinking about what you're saying and what the consequences will be. And you should seriously eat something other than apples and tomatoes because you look starving and it makes me sad. "

Ok, it wasn't really what he was expecting... Why did he stay? To hear what was wrong with him? Percival came a little closer to him, his hands shaking, as if he was about to reveal something important. Credence looked at him attentively, trying in vain to calm his heart which had accelerated, and the bats (yes, because there was no way he was talking about butterflies for _Graves_ !) flying in his belly.

" I realize now that the day I met you, at that turkey curry buffet, I was terribly rude. " Percival continued, visibly anxious but determined to get to the end of his thought. "I was wearing this jumper with a horrible deer head, which my mother had insisted I put on, and I was unforgivably impolite. And I also know I shouldn't have made those remarks to you at the grocery shop, it's just that... The fact is… What I'm trying to tell you, in the most clumsy and inarticulate way possible, is that... is that despite appearances, I like you... very much. "

Credence had a dry little laugh. It was really nonsense! He shook his head before saying, almost amused:

"Apart from the fact that I smoke, that I drink, that I look like a depressive escaped from an asylum, that I have a horrible mother, and my inability to... "

"No, I like you very much. " Graves interrupted him. "Just as you are. "

The time froze. He had said this as he hung his black irises on Credence's, and the young man's heart missed a beat, suddenly losing all smile, blushing softly. He liked him... He liked him very much... Just the way he was... It was more than anyone had ever felt for him. Graves's voice ricocheted around in his mind, suddenly covering up all the unpleasant remarks he had made to him. Percival came a little closer, making a movement towards his cheek, but just as his fingers were about to rest on the youngest's face, Seraphina's voice brought them back to reality.

"Percival, Patrick has some very interesting ideas about our case. "

Credence stepped back and Percival let his hand fall back along his body as he turned towards his colleague. He stared at her for a few moments before Seraphina snapped her fingers several times. Perhaps it was to make him react, but Credence found this atrociously inappropriate and disrespectful, and he had the sudden urge to grab Graves by the arm and take him with him in the taxi to get him away from that woman. But the reality was quite different.

"I'm coming. " Percival said to Seraphina.

She disappeared again into the living room after a nasty look at Credence. She had broken the moment, she had shattered something that the young man was still struggling to define. His heart was beating, his hands were trembling, and he had this strange feeling that something was slipping away from him as Graves took a step backwards. The older man smiled at him, tenderly, beautifully, sincerely... _Perfectly…_

"I have to go. " He simply said

And before Credence could answer, could try to hold him back, he disappeared into the living room too. What had just happened? Why did he have the feeling that he had flown away and then crashed against the cold parquet floor? He had the feeling that he was missing something that he couldn't even have, couldn't even hold, couldn't even touch. Something that had the heady scent and fascinating look of a being he had sworn to hate. The heart wants what it wants, as they say...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, Percy's finally making progress in expressing himself ^^


	7. The calm before the storm... Or maybe the other way around?

_Weight: 134 lbs (why am I losing weight? I am eating properly and exercising, it's not fair!!)._

_Cigarettes: 27 per day (that's always three less...)_

_Alcohol: Just a few cocktails with friends._

"Just as you are? " Queenie repeated again.

Credence nodded, unable to do anything but take another sip of his mojito. Queenie exchanged glances with Tina, his two friends seemed surprised and had difficulty knowing what to say. He didn't really know why he had brought the subject to the spotlight, but he needed to confide in them, to talk about what this revelation had shaken up in him. Nagini had some last minute touch-ups to do on a tattoo and Jacob was too tired to go out tonight. So the crisis meeting was just a lovely evening with his two childhood friends. 

"But you... you don’t like him, do you ? " Tina asked.

"No! No, after Gellert I really don't want to fall into the trap of a man who has already stolen another man's wife and who is obviously about to be in a relationship with his colleague... if it is not already the case... "

Tina narrowed her eyes, as if she wasn't really convinced. To tell the truth, Credence himself was not convinced by his ability to stay away from Percival Graves. He could no longer really hate him, resenting him for his comments on his diet. The worst was when he began to make excuses for him, to tell himself that Percival thought he was doing the right thing, that he was looking after him. _Oh my God, but can you hear yourself think?_ he reprimanded himself.

More and more often he hoped to run into him in the grocery shop, to recognize his shoulders from afar or to come across his face. And in those moments, he was furious with himself, furious to be so weak, furious to indulge such feelings for a man who had despised him from day one.

"Credence, I know it sounds strange but... Be careful, okay? "

Tina seemed worried. And she had her reasons, especially after what happened with Gellert last May. The young man just smiled and nodded before Queenie changed the subject, asking Credence what he was planning to do for his birthday, which was November 12th.

And while they were discussing his desire to prepare a meal for his friends, Credence wondered if he would run into Percival again in the next few days, as if his brain could not help coming back to Percy.

_Percy? Is it Percy now? Does he have a nickname now? Don't you want to hang his picture on your fridge to see it every morning while we're at it?_

But Credence didn't see Percival again for a long time. In fact, if you think about it, three weeks wasn't that long, but for him it seemed like an eternity. An eternity during which he had to pass for a fool in his usual grocery shop, going there every day, only to leave with a few tomatoes and somes apples. And brown rice and fish sometimes, because it was good for his health.

Could he really admit that he missed Graves? No! No, he was just confused because for the first time someone had made a love confession to him (however clumsy it was...).

A new sigh passed his lips. Sitting at his desk to organize his research, Credence was lost in thought when his boss walked up to him. He threw a newspaper in front of the young man, startled him, before saying:

"Ok Credence, let's see if you can do it right this time. "

Credence straightened himself up to give himself some composure, pulling his hair back into place properly. He looked at the article entitled " _Aghani-Heaney: At the gates of the future_ " for a long time before raising his eyes to the old man. He smiled politely, waiting for his boss, Webster Boot (he had finally managed to remember his name!), to explain the situation to him.

"The verdict for the Aghani-Heaney case is expected today. I want you to go there with a full team. I want a perfect three-minute interview! "

Credence blinked his eyes several times. He was about to be fired... He had no idea what case Webster was talking about. It was much worse than getting a personal phone call and lying about the name of an author... His boss sighed, closing his eyes, pinching his nose bone to keep his temper before asking :

"Do you know the details of the Aghani-Heaney case? "

_Find an answer! Do something about it!_

"Uh... It has to do with someone called Aghani-Heaney? " he suggested, himself unconvinced by his sentence.

The man in front of him sighed again before taking a chair and sitting down next to Credence. He leaned on the edge of the desk, resting his chin on his joined hands before taking a serious tone and saying :

"They are two people, a couple: Kafir Aghani and Eleonor Heaney. She is a brilliant American artist, known throughout the country, but he is a Kurdish freedom fighter. The government wants him extradited, and he is likely to be executed when he gets there.

Credence's eyes widen in shock. He was beginning to understand why this case was important and why Webster wanted to send him to the courthouse to hear the verdict.

"Oh my god... " the younger one gasped.

"Yes, exactly! They're married, they love each other, and she's been fighting to keep him here for almost 6 years. Today, we will know the final decision. "

"It's exciting! " confessed Credence.

His boss stared at him for a few instants and asked with a smirk on his face:

"What are you waiting for? "

* * *

In front of the courthouse, there was an incredible amount of people. Everybody was there to support the couple, brandishing banners and placards with the words: " _Live and_ _Freedom for Aghani_ ". And in this tumult, Credence and his team found it very difficult to get close to the entrance.

Suddenly, the young man was pushed back by a group of protesters, and he lost sight of Abernathy, who continued to elbow his way through. Credence was struggling to get out of the wave, trying to push some people away, when a hand closed around his arm, pulling him out of the crowd, literally saving him.

Credence felt as if he had a vision when his eyes fell on Percival Graves's concerned face. He was in his lawyer's outfit, his hair in a mess, his eyes still had dark circles under them, but he seemed in better condition than the evening of the meal at Gemma's home. And before Credence could stop his lips from moving, he murmured blissfully: 

"You like me just as I am... "

" What ? I can't hear anything with all this noise! "Percival smiled.

Credence came back to reality, shaking his head to try to chase away his silly daydreams, and to calm his heartbeat. He had to stop playing the damsel in distress! One more second in this strange state and he would have kissed Graves! _Pull yourself together Credence. Focus!_ He cleared his throat, replacing his hair properly, before raising his gaze to Percival's interrogating face. As he was about to answer, Abernathy appeared at his side.

"Credence, we have a problem! " he said, panicked. "Kafir Aghani and Eleonor Heaney have already left. We missed them! "

His stomach tied violently. That's it, he had just lost his job.

"Oh my God... It's unemployment, that's it... Do we... Do we know if they gave interviews? "

Abernathy shrugged, obviously as lost as Credence.

"They didn't give any interviews. " Percival replied

Credence turned his attention to him, raising an eyebrow.

"How do you know? " he asked.

"Because I'm the one defending them and I told them not to give interviews. " He simply said, as if it was obvious.

But in front of Credence's pale and panicked face, something changed in Percival's dark gaze, something that looked strangely like the glow the younger one had noticed when Graves had confided his attraction for him. A sincere smile appeared on his face as he said:

"I think I can help you. "

And so, within half an hour, the whole Ilvermorny TV team was in the living room of Kafir Aghani and Eleonor Heaney, sitting around the coffee table. Percival supervised the entire interview, often smiling at Credence. He even agreed to answer some questions (he was perfect in front of the camera, it was almost unfair!). Everything went incredibly well, and for once Credence felt neither stupid, nor worthless, let alone ridiculous in front of Graves. On the contrary, he felt like a great journalist who had managed to get the news of the year. Eleonor and Kafir were a lovely couple, very involved in human rights and socially and politically committed beyond their own case.

When Credence presented his work to Webster, he was really nervous. He was happy with his result, but he was afraid it wouldn't suit his boss. The entire team watched the three-minute video and at the end of the interview, Boot was silent for a few seconds before turning to Credence. A happy smile took place on his wrinkled face as he proudly announced :

"Credence Jones, already a legend. "

And the young man felt almost floating, blushing as applause resounded in the office. Certainly, he was proud of himself. But all this success, and he knew it, he owed it to Percival Graves. All this recognition for his work and his involvement, he owed it to Percy and his unexpected help. Yes... Percy... He was Percy now…

* * *

On his birthday, Credence took a day off, which Webster gladly granted him without any complaint. Within ten days, he had become a well-known journalist throughout New York, thanks in large part to his interview on the Aghani-Heaney case, but also after having made a few original interventions in schools or fire stations.

He started his day with a huge coffee and a box of croissants that Jacob had dropped off the day before. He had received a message from Newt wishing him a happy birthday, apologizing again for not being able to attend his evening meal. Scamander had to leave for Norway to study a new kind of bird. Credence thanked him warmly, assuring him that he did not blame him at all for his absence. Then, after breakfast, the young man took a long shower, singing "Wicked Game" by Chris Isaak loudly.

_And I don't wanna fall in love (this world is only gonna break your heart)_

_No, I don't wanna fall in love (this world is only gonna break your heart)_

_With you_

Around noon he had finally decided to leave his flat to go shopping for the dinner tonight. He had chosen to cook maki, convinced that after his two Japanese cooking classes he had transformed himself into an artist. He had become a respected journalist after only four months in the business, there was no reason why he couldn't be a great cook! Once again he looked for Graves's silhouette in the shop before mentally reprimanding himself. He found himself pathetic and frankly laughable.

For the rest of the day he answered messages from his friends and relatives. His mother called him in the middle of the afternoon. She sounded tired and sad, and after a few minutes of conversation she told him that she missed Charles and that Julian was an angry and selfish person and that she was no longer sure of her choices.

" I ended up thinking I was wrong. " she said. "It was exhilarating the first few months, but now... Now I just feel like I'm being shallow. "

"Mum, if you're not happy, don't stay! I love you, and even though it's going to take him some time to forgive you, I think Daddy still loves you. "

"You think?" she asked, visibly moved.

He really didn't want to hear her cry, but at the same time he was afraid of putting his father in an awkward situation. He knew that Charles hadn't turned the page, since he categorically refused to listen to anyone who spoke to him about divorce and still spoke of Henrietta as his wife. But it wasn't up to him to talk about it with his mother. He was already miserable in his own heart stories, he certainly wasn't going to deal with other people's romances.

"You should call him, Mum. " he finally said.

"You're right, my dear. I have to go, my darling. Happy birthday Credence, tell me when you receive the Chanel package I ordered for you. "

"Mama, I said no presents... " he sighed.

"It's not a present, it's a box. " she joked. "Kisses my precious. "

"Kisses Mommy. "

He hung up with a smile on his face. It was probably selfish, but he was happy that he could hope his parents would get back together. Charles sent him a long message telling him how much he loved him and how proud he was to be his father. And Credence's smile shone even brighter. Everything had been going perfectly since that morning. It was a wonderful day !

At about 5 p.m., he started to prepare the rice for the makis. And despite his cooking lessons and his self-confidence, Credence was unable to cope with the sushi rice. He burnt his first pan, congratulating himself on having opted for the 2 kilos packet of sticky rice rather than the small size. He was putting a second pot on the stove, when someone knocked on his door. Credence had rice everywhere, even in his hair. His friends were two hours ahead of schedule! Panicking he unlocked the door and came face to face with Percival Graves. He froze for a few seconds, blushing before babbling: 

"Oh... Percival Graves? Uh... Good evening. "

Graves had a tiny grin on his face. He took out his phone to show it to Credence. On the screen, an article in the New York Times announced that Credence was the new face of New York journalism. The young man blushed while Percival put his phone in his pocket, explaining with an uncertain smile :

"Good evening. The downstairs door was open. I had come to greet and congratulate the new face of New York journalism. But I think it's rather bad timing, you look busy. "

He made a vague gesture towards Credence's rice-covered apron, and the young man had a frightened look on his face before running to his kitchen shouting:

"Oh shit, the rice! "

Of course, the damned rice had stuck to the bottom of the pan! Damn it, why was it so hard to cook? It was only rice! He was fulminating against himself when a little throat clearing at the entrance to his kitchen brought him back to reality. Percival was leaning against the door frame, obviously not knowing whether he was welcome or whether he should leave. Then, in a small voice, he asked Credence:

"I don't want to,,, I really don't want to intrude but... Do you need help? "

Credence could have refused, told him that he was going to make it, hung on to his pride and said that he would achieve this meal on his own. But he wasn't really sure of the result and he suddenly felt very anxious at the thought of not being able to prepare anything. Without really knowing why, his lower lip began to tremble and his eyes mist up with tears.

"Yes, please... " he said, his voice shaking.

Percy took off his jacket (he wore an incredibly attractive three-piece suit tonight), put it on the back of a chair, and walked towards Credence. With the greatest delicacy, he took the pan and spoon from his hands to see if it was savable. Then, with a tender smile, he said:

"Ok, I'll take care of the sushi rice, go take a shower. "

Credence tried to protest but Percy stopped him by adding :

"You're covered in rice and you're at your wit's end. Go take a shower, the rice is safe with me, I swear it. "

"Thank you, you are literally saving me, once again. "

Graves smiled even more, very happy with this sentence before concentrating entirely on the rebellious rice. Credence took off his apron, leaving it in his laundry bin before picking up the clothes he had arranged for tonight: a white linen shirt, ochre trousers and his black Richelieu shoes. He spent a considerable amount of time in the shower, forced to remove one by one the pernicious grains of rice that had clung to his hair.

Once dried, dressed and styled, he left the bathroom to go into the living room, connecting his telephone to his speakers so that he could put on music. He hastened to change the song when he mistakenly clicked on the playlist: **_Break up_**. He opted for a playlist of music from the 40s and 50s. And finally, after a deep breath, he walked to the kitchen to join Percival.

The smell was much closer to the one he had had in his cooking class than the scent that had filled the flat an hour earlier. Graves was cutting up the fish, humming the music that was playing. After a few moments of watching Viviane's son concentrate on his task, the younger one asked him:

"So, how does it look? "

Percival was almost startled before turning back, smiling and answering:

"Well, the rice is saved, but your salmon has a strange color. "

Credence quickly joined him, the stress returning at full gallop.

"Shit, I must have buy some trout! " he said as he noticed the shade of the fish.

"It doesn't matter, both can be eaten raw. "

The young journalist raised his eyes shining towards Graves. If that was the truth, Percival was definitely an angel sent from heaven.

"Are you sure? "

"Completely!" he smiled. "What else do you want to put in your makis? "

Credence went to his fridge, opening it to remember what he had chosen to put in his dish.

"Avocado, carrots, cucumbers and omelet. "

Percival made a little admiring whistle before saying :

"Oh my, you don't do it halfway! "

Credence took the ingredients out of the fridge, putting them on the table, frowning and grumbling:

"It's my birthday... "

And suddenly Percival was terribly close to him. So near that Credence closed his eyes, breathing in the heady fragrance of the lawyer. He felt his breath on his shoulder, and he was more than aware that he would only have to take a step backwards to press his back against his chest.

"I know... " Graves said. "Happy Birthday Credence. "

"Thank you. " he murmured, blushing.

They stayed like that for a few seconds. Credence didn't dare to turn around, almost hoping that Percival would put his hands around him to embrace him. But the eldest did not do so, simply stepping aside before clearing his throat to give himself some composure and to propose :

"Well! I'll take care of the omelet and you take care of the vegetables, and then we'll assemble the rolls of makis together. "

Credence opened his eyes again to lay them on Percy's happy face. He shook his head to get his thoughts straight. _Don't succumb Credence! He may be adorable (and excruciatingly sexy) but he's unreliable! he remembered._ Then with a determined look on his face, he replied:

"That sounds perfect! "

They remained silent for long minutes, just exchanging smiles as they continued cooking. Percival was incredibly meticulous, much more than Credence. And by God, he had perfect hands!

Once the rice was cold enough, they started to prepare the rolls of makis, the younger one trying to copy what Graves did so easily. But after several attempts, he had to face the obvious: Percy was an out-of-the-ordinary cook and he was barely worthy of doing the dishes... (in the distance, in the dark, with a filthy sink.).

"Oh my God, I'm so bad at it! " he exclaimed. "And you make the most perfect rolls in the universe ! "

Percival had a small amused laugh, before getting up to go to the fridge. He took out one of the bottles of white wine that Credence had bought. The young man looked at him, he moved into the kitchen, as if he had always lived here, taking out two glasses before filling one and handing it to Credence and saying :

"Don't worry, your friends are here to see you, not for your cooking skills. Relax, Credence. "

The young journalist accepted the wine, blushing and whispering a faint:

"Yes, you're right. "

Graves gave him a big smile, pouring himself a glass before raising it to Credence's attention.

"Happy birthday, Credence Jones. "

"Thank you, Percival Graves. "

They toasted to the new year that was beginning for Credence, drinking alcohol from the tip of their lips without taking their eyes off each other. What he had felt at Gemma's suddenly came back, stealing his heart, waking up the butterflies (OK, now they were butterflies) in his belly. What was happening to him? Even with Gellert, he had never felt this way before. To escape this feeling, Credence drank another sip of wine before walking away, going back to his makis. On a sudden impulse, he asked:

"Is it true that I was running half-naked after you in your garden? "

Percival seemed surprised by the question, but before letting Credence regret his sentence, he replied with a smirk:

"Oh yes, my mother found photos and a video from that summer. You were 8 years old and I had just turned 13. "

"That's quite an age difference, quite perverse in fact. " he joked.

"Yes, and I have to admit that I was pretty proud of it. "

Graves blushes slightly after this revelation. He finished his roll of makis when the younger one asked him, visibly destabilized:

"Of me running around in my underwear in your garden? "

Percival hesitated for a moment to answer, thinking about what he was going to say, frowning, lost in thought and memories. Then, after a deep breath and under Credence's questioning gaze, he explained:

" I was happy that you trust me enough to do so. You were still so terrified of showing your body to anyone at the time. You were afraid that everyone would judge you, or find you disgusting, but with me, it was different. "

That awakened something new in Credence, something that scared him terribly and at the same time made him feel really important. Percival remembered. He remembered him, the summer spent in his garden. He remembered the skinny, lost and wounded little boy he was. He remembered Credence, he had not forgotten. And this feeling gradually gave way to something else, something sad, as he realized that he had completely forgotten those childhood moments with Percival. 

"So... So you remember? " he asked.

Graves had a little grimace, sorry for having lied when they first met.

"Yes... I didn't see myself confessing that in front of your mother at the Christmas buffet... But yes, I remember that summer very well. It was just before I left for boarding school. You don't remember. "

It wasn't a question, just an observation, but Credence couldn't help but say :

"No, I'm sorry. "

Percival waved his hand a little before simply smiling and continuing to prepare the roll of makis.

"No harm done. "

"Is there anything else important that I have forgotten about that summer?

Graves suddenly looked up at him, as if Credence had said something strange and unsettling. With a slightly embarrassed pout on his face, he gathered the rolls of makis in a plate before putting them in the fridge. Credence waited patiently for him to answer, afraid he had said something inappropriate. But Percival murmured, almost low enough so that the youngest could not hear him:

"Just me, who called you _white flower_. "

" _White flower_? Why? " he wondered.

"It's a long story... " he sighed, ending the discussion.

Credence didn't insist, he was sufficiently destabilized by the nostalgia that had taken its place on the older man's face. Percival shook his head, leaving his memories behind before taking the bottle of wine and refilling the glasses for both of them. With a mocking tone, he asked:

"You wouldn't by any chance have some punch, would you? Some noodles in a salad? Beet cubes, stuffed olives or crisps? "

Credence's laughter echoed through the kitchen. He openly mocked the Christmas buffet. With Percy, everything seemed so simple, natural, pleasant. He felt strangely safe, and the little inner voice that kept repeating to him over and over again that Graves had stolen Gellert's wife and that he was probably in a relationship with Seraphina, became more and more discreet.

"No, Henrietta! " joked Credence, imitating Mary Goldstein's high-pitched voice. "And on top of that, I think you have to come and see the sauce, we have a problem. "

"Come on, Mary, it's very simple, you just have to mix it! " replied Percival.

They laughed like two teenagers. Then the music changed abruptly enough to draw their attention to the piece that was playing. "I don't want to set the world on fire" by The Ink Spots. What a sweet song…

"Oh my God, I haven't heard this music in years, it's old!" Percy exclaimed.

"You want me to change it?" Credence suggested.

"No! No, absolutely not!" he hastened to say.

It was much more sincere than the youngest expected. Percival blushed, drinking another sip of wine, tossing back and forth on his feet like a shy teenager. Credence found him once again charming and he had to refrain from putting a kiss on his cheek. It almost burned his lips so much he wanted to. He was there struggling with his desire to touch Graves's skin when Graves asked in an insecure voice:

"Would you... would you dance with me? "

"Me? "

_No, the Pope! Of course you, there are only the two of you in your dumb flat!_

"You don't have to accept, it's just something that came into my head, I don't want to... "

"I might be catastrophic. " Credence interrupted him shyly.

"I won't tell anyone, I promise. " Percival smiled.

And for God's sake, that smile! How was he supposed to say no to such a proposal and such a face? He felt as if he was liquefying right there and then. Had Percival always been so beautiful, so enigmatic, so fascinating? Graves offered his hand, waiting for Credence's response. He slipped his fingers into his, trying to ignore the shiver that ran up his spine at this simple touch. The older one gently led him to the living room. Then he passed an arm around his waist while Credence put his free hand on his shoulder, and they began to dance.

_I've lost all ambition for worldly acclaim_

_I just want to be the one you love_

_And with your admission that you'd feel the same_

_I'll have reached the goal I'm dreaming of, believe me_

After a few moments of dancing, looking each other in the eyes, Credence allowed himself to get a little closer to Percival, placing his head on his shoulder, letting him lean against him, closing his eyes. Graves did not move for long seconds before finally placing his cheek against his hair. It was tender, soft, far from anything he had experienced before. It was true, it was a lot of things said in silence, a lot of things that strangely fit the lyrics of the song they were dancing on.

_You see, way down deep inside of me, darling_

_I have only one desire_

_And that one desire is you_

_And I know, baby, ain't nobody else gonna do_

Lulled by the smell of Graves, by his touch, by the melody, Credence straightened himself up, moving away far enough to be able to look Percy in the eye again. His irises shuttled back and forth between those of Viviane's son and his lips. He approached gently, perhaps waiting for Graves's approval, listening only to his heart beating wildly and to the irrepressible desire that had just arisen in the hollow of his belly.

And just as Percival was finally leaning towards him, and Credence was closing his eyelids to welcome this first kiss, the front door opened in a crash as his friends shouted a deafening " **Happy Birthday** ".

The young man backed away suddenly, imitated by Percival who blushed to the roots of his hair. Tina's huge smile faded to give way to an air of suspicion. Queenie had a small giggle as Jacob and Nagini were both speechless in front of the scene they had discovered. Credence didn't know where to put himself, and simply crossed his arms, unable to know what to do with his hands now that they were empty. 

"Well... Good evening Percival. " Tina said at last, to put an end to the awkward silence.

"Porpentina, Queenie. " Percival greeted, with an insecure look on his face.

"Hi, apple stalker!" exclaimed Nagini.

"Nag, shut up!" Jacob immediately intervened.

If it had been possible, Percival would probably have blushed even more, but he was already so scarlet that Credence was afraid he would run away or explode.

"Are you joining us for dinner? " Queenie asked cheerfully.

"Yes!" Credence replied at once. "Yes, of course Percival is staying. "

Tina gave him a strange look, and the younger one just smiled at her to reassure her.

"I really don't want to intrude..." Percy tried, running a hand across the back of his neck.

"Oh baby, you can tell from the look on your face where you want to intrude. " Nagini laughed

"Nag, for God's sake, shut up!" Jacob raged.

Well, now Credence was really afraid that Graves would flee. He stood next to him, putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder before saying in a loud voice:

"Percival is staying because it's my birthday and he really saved the meal tonight. Anyone with a comment on this subject is asked to keep their mouth closed. "

"Of course, honey. " Queenie smiled

Nagini complained about something, but Credence decided to ignore it. Credence introduced his friends to Percy, praying that Nag would behave in a civilized manner for the rest of the evening. All together, they prepared the table. Then Percy and Jacob cut the rolls of maki, quickly becoming friendly. Queenie put the birthday cake, prepared by her fiancé, in the fridge, preventing Credence from seeing it, to keep it a surprise. Nagini kept her remarks to herself and Tina also preferred to remain silent, even though she seemed disturbed by the situation. Credence sat at the end of the table, Percival on his right, Nagini on his left, Tina opposite him and Queenie and Jacob opposite each other. They began to eat without saying anything, his friends casting curious glances at Percy. It was Jacob who spoke first.

"It's really very good Credence!" Jacob congratulated him.

"It's better than I expected. " Nag added.

All eyes turned towards her, Tina reprimanding her with her dark irises and Nagini raised her hands in signs of innocence before saying :

"What? Don't look at me like that, three months ago he could barely make a ham sandwich!"

"There's not enough tomatoes..." Percy teased, exchanging an amused look with Credence.

"And apples! " Queenie laughed.

It wasn't mean, just a friendly taunting that made them all smile. Everything was perfect, simple, happy, comforting. He couldn't have imagined a better evening for his birthday.

"Without Percival, it would have been a disaster... " Credence admitted.

"You give me far too much credit. " Percy reassured him.

If the others noticed the gaze full of tenderness they exchanged, none of them allowed themselves to make the slightest remark.

"So, I propose a toast! " Tina announced, after a few moments of silence, getting the attention of her best friend who finally turned away from Percival.

Everyone raised their glasses with a smile, waiting for the young Goldstein's little speech.

"To Credence, one of the most marvelous beings in the universe at only 26 years old, who sometimes listens to too much music for a depressed thirty-year-old, but whom we love. _Just as he is_. "

Credence felt his cheeks warm, drinking his wine to hide his discomfort, trying to ignore Graves's burning irises on him. Well, now he knew that his declaration at Gemma's house had been heard and that Credence had discussed it with his friends.

The doorbell rang at the front door, surprising them all. Credence frowned, confused. Who could it be? All his friends were present, and he had already planned to see Gemma the next day to celebrate his birthday with her. Maybe his mother? No, Henrietta would have warned him. And there was no chance that Charles would turn up unexpectedly. 

"I'll take care of it. " Jacob said as he got up to go and open the door.

Tina gave Credence an interrogative look and he just shrugged.

And suddenly, the wonderful evening changed abruptly. In front of him, Gellert's silhouette appeared, and he blinked several times to be sure it was him. From the corner of his eye he saw Percival tense up as soon as he laid his eyes on him. And all this awakened the little inner voice and his incessant litany of : _Percival is unreliable, you've been tricked, and Gellert has just come tonight to remind you of that, to take away the happiness that you thought you could touch with your fingertips._ Why did he come tonight?

"Oh, God, sorry, I'm... sorry, I'm... I'm interrupting something, apparently, and uh... " Gellert mumbled, obviously having already had a few drinks before coming. Then his eyes met Vivianne's son's and he suddenly turned pale. "Graves? Percival, what are you doing here? "

Graves straightened up, raising his chin, suddenly regaining the cold, almost disdainful air he had had the first time he met Credence. He clenched his jaw, deliberately choosing not to answer Grindelwald's question. Gellert laughed nastily before saying :

"Oh, right... Yes, of course... I should have known. You're pretty good at that sort of thing, picking up other people's crumbs before you run away. "

"What the fuck does that fucker want?" Nagini raced off, clenching her fists, visibly ready to strangle Gellert.

"I'm sorry... Credence, I thought you'd be alone tonight. " the German explained. " In fact, I don't know why I thought that... "

"Because you're so fucking selfish?" Nag suggested dryly.

"Nag, please... " Queenie intervened, anxious not to interfere too much in Credence's love affairs.

Young Jones stood still for a few moments. Then, after a clearing of his throat, he stood up and said:

"Excuse me. Gellert, will you follow me into the kitchen, please? "

He really didn't feel like arguing with him in front of everyone, let alone Graves, who seemed to contain himself as best he could. Tina seemed truly worried and it was with reluctance that she watched her best friend disappear into the kitchen with the man who had broken his heart.

Once they were far enough away, Credence crossed his arms, raised an eyebrow, biting the inside of his cheek to keep his calm. He gave Gellert an interrogating look, urging him to speak. The older man approached him, too close for Credence's liking, who moved backwards slightly.

"I'm going crazy, Credence, I've been thinking only of you for months. " he said in a desperate tone. "I am no longer able to do anything without you. "

It was the best joke he had ever heard! It had been almost six months since they had separated, more than four months since they had seen each other, and he came tonight to tell him that he missed him? He swallowed a little bad laugh.

"Gellert... " he sighed.

"I know I've been the last of the assholes, and I have no right to just show up at your place tonight, like that, without warning. But it's your birthday, and I... I couldn't imagine spending this evening without you. "

He was almost convincing with his weeping, imploring eyes. He was really good at acting! _Don't fall into the trap, Credence, not again._ he thought.

"Gellert, I don't know if... "

"It's my fault, and I have no excuse. " He interrupted him, putting a hand on his hip, ignoring the discomfort of the younger one. "But that weekend in the country, the fact that you asked me if I was in love, meeting your parents, I... I panicked. "

"But you were already in a relationship with Ruby and already engaged to her, so it's not like it mattered. " he replied curtly. "By the way, how is she? "

Gellert had a small, plaintive sigh, closing his eyes. A tear rolled down his cheek, and he came a little closer to Credence, resting his forehead on his shoulder before confessing in a low voice: 

"It's over... She left me when she realized I couldn't forget you. "

Credence put his hands on his shoulders to gently push him away, but Grindelwald had to take it differently as he wrapped his arms around his waist, linking his gaze to his ex-lover's. Credence pushed a little harder, his discomfort giving way to anger when he realized that Gellert would not let go.

"So, you want to get a sex story to pass the time! " he said, getting more and more angry.

"No, of course not! " the other one smiled, cheesy. "I know what I said hurt you, and I feel terrible about it. But every time I see you on TV, I remember everything we experienced, and it's slowly killing me. It drives me crazy Credence... "

 _Leave me alone, I don’t want you …_ He felt uncomfortable. He really didn't want that embrace, really didn't want to feel this hands, which he had longed for so much in the past, resting on his hips, that breath, which he had once found so soft, caressing his lips. He pushed a little more on his shoulders, trying to escape him, feeling his heart drumming against his chest.

"Gellert, it's not a good idea, and in all sincerity, I don't know if... "

"I miss you..." he murmured. "I miss you terribly, babe. I need you to... "

"I'm going to leave! "

Percival's cold voice startled them and Credence took the opportunity to free himself, blushing when he noticed in which position Graves had just discovered them. He was horribly ashamed.

"Well, all the best, Percy!" Gellert exclaimed, with that hurtful tone he always used when he spoke to Viviane's son.

Credence gave him an evil look, before walking towards Graves who was putting on the jacket he had put on one of the chairs. The younger one felt panicked, confused.

"No, Percival, stay!" he tried, his voice trembling.

The lawyer cast an unreadable glance at him, detailing him with his dark irises during long, too long, seconds. Then in a striking tone, which he must surely have used during his pleadings, he said :

"No. No, I really don't think that's wise. Thank you for the meal and for the dance. "

The tender and caring Percy had disappeared to make way again for this mysterious and unpredictable being. The one that Credence had hated for so long, the one he was trying to forget. He had spoken so dryly that the young man felt his heart tighten and his eyes moisten. Without asking his opinion, Gellert put a possessive arm around his shoulders and said, with an unpleasant smirk on his face:

"Oh, come on, Graves, you' re not going to leave because of me? A little maturity, we are adults. I think it's more than time that we forget the past, you and I. I've forgiven you, you know? You could at least stay and share a glass of reconciliation with Credence and me, what do you say? "

Who did he think he was? Showing up like that and acting as if Credence was something he owned! He wasn't a toy, an object you use before you throw it into a corner. Unfortunately, before he could say what he thought to Gellert, Graves clenched his jaw and said, furiously:

"Goodbye Credence! "

Then he turned his heels, without another glance at the younger one, leaving quickly for the front door. Credence pushed Gellert away rather abruptly, trying to catch up with Percival.

"Percival! Percival, please! " he called out to him, almost imploring.

But the other ignored him and the door slammed violently in front of a lost Credence who tried to swallow the painful ball at the back of his throat. His sadness and feeling of helplessness turned to anger as he returned to Grindelwald, his fists so clenched that his knuckles were white.

"Why are you here, Gellert?" he raged.

He had a small amused smile that annoyed the younger one even more.

"I've just explained it to you, babe. And the real question is rather: why was Percival fucking Graves at your birthday dinner? Shit, here he comes again... "

And indeed, Viviane's son had just returned to the flat, in a state of terrifying fury. He was fulminating, his eyes shining with anger, his hands so tightly clenched that it must have hurt, his whole body stretched out like a bow. He was out of his mind, holding himself back with difficulty, and Credence was almost afraid of him. He no longer had anything to do with the gentle man who had so delicately invited him to dance earlier.

"Ok, Gellert, you're going out! " he said, or rather he growled.

"I beg your pardon? " the other laughed, not impressed at all.

"You, me, outside, now! " he shouted.

Credence's friends approached, waiting a little further away in the living room, visibly worried by what was happening. How could the evening have degenerated so quickly?

"All right... should I bring my dueling pistol, my magic wand or my sword?" Gellert mocked wickedly.

Without answering him, Graves left the flat again. Credence was shaken by the speed and brutality of the exchanges between the two men. What exactly was going on?

"Ok... Ok, all right... " Grindelwald sighed before following Percival outside.

Credence hastened to take his coat, imitated by his friends, before the small group all went down together to join the two guys in the street at the bottom of the building. Fortunately, the place was deserted, which was rare enough to be noticed. Credence really didn't feel like having a scene in front of a whole audience down there ...

In the pitch-black night, Percival and Gellert were face to face, the German visibly relaxed, as if Grave's state of anger meant nothing.

"I should have done this years ago!" shouted the lawyer. 

"Done what, little Percy? " the other provoked him.

And the first blow went off, violent, precise. He seemed to have been held back far too long. Credence put his hand over his mouth to muffle the cry of shock that came over his lips. He expected the two men to argue, not to fight in the street! We weren't in a gangster film, for God's sake!

"Oh! Oh, fuck, it hurts!" Gellert complained. "What the hell's the matter with you? "

For an answer, Percival hit him again, a little harder this time, and an unpleasant sound of breaking bones was heard. He had just broken his nose. Credence approached to intervene, but before he could do so, Gellert picked up a metal bin lid that was lying on the ground, ready to use it as a weapon.

"Gellert, no!" Credence shouted.

But Grindelwald was as fast as he was sneaky, and the metal lid fell suddenly on Graves, who had barely enough time to protect himself with his hands. 

"Stop it! Stop, now!" Credence tried.

On the steps of the entrance, the young man's friends watched the scene with stunned eyes. The fight was merciless.

"Whose side are we on? " asked Nagini

"Nag!" Tina protested.

"What? It's been a long time since I've seen a fight like this! " she defended herself.

"We're for Percival, of course! " Queenie replied, visibly stressed.

"But he slept with Gellert's wife!" Jacob added.

"Who cares? Gellert's a piece of shit!" Tina said angrily. 

"Oh God, Jacob, do something! " his fiancée sobbed.

"Me?" he replied surprised.

Poor Jacob knew full well that he didn't stand a chance and that he was more likely to end up with a broken bone than as a hero. For his part, Credence was desperately trying to separate the two men. Graves was cruel in his blows, aiming for the ribs, the belly, until Gellert fell to the ground, the bin lid rolling away. Percival threw himself on him, grabbing him by the neck, continuing to hit him with all his strength. A horrible fear crept into Credence's mind: he was going to kill him, if nobody did anything, he was going to kill him.

He suddenly came between the two opponents, protecting Gellert as best he could. Grave's fist remained frozen in the air when the young man shouted: 

"Percival stop! Stop, now! "

Viviane's son seemed to come back to reason, staring at Credence as if he finally realized where he was and what he had just done. Young Jones had a terrible urge to cry, because of the panic, because of the tension, because of the hard realization that Percival was more cruel than he had thought. Graves released Gellert, getting back on his feet. Credence glanced at his ex-lover, discovering his face already swollen in places and his nose bleeding.

Furious, the younger one turned towards Percival before asking dryly:

"What the hell's wrong with you? What's your problem? "

Graves seemed shocked by his question, as if it was irrelevant. He narrowed his eyes, frowning, before replying coldly:

"What's wrong with me? MY problem? "

Credence got back on his feet, giving free rein to his outburst, the result of the fear he had felt seeing them fighting like that.

"Yes! " he shouted. "You play the perfect man and the defender of morale and justice in front of everyone, but you're just like the others! "

Percival seemed to take the blow, as if Credence's sentence had been far more violent than all the hits Gellert had given him that evening. His eyes moistened with tears, but the younger one had been far too frightened to be able to calm down to this simple vision. Graves asked in a trembling voice:

"Is that... Is that what you think of me? "

The question caught him off guard. He wasn't sure of the answer. He felt his blood boiling in his veins, his hands trembling with adrenaline, his heart beating at an impressive speed. A joyless laugh passed Graves's lips before he said, angry again:

"It's time for me to go. I notice now that I am struggling against a prejudice that you seem unable to leave aside. I will not continue to fight for nothing. I've been doing it for too long... And maybe you would have spared me if I hadn't hurt your pride on the day of that stupid buffet! "

"My pride? " Credence cried.

"You protect him, after all that he has done to you, you accept to discuss with him, you are even ready to forgive him! " Graves yelled, only a few inches from his face, tears of rage rolling down his pale and wounded cheeks. "I never had the slightest chance after just a few bad words! "

"A few bad words? You were despicable with me! You have been cruel and contemptuous, always making remarks about my diet, as if I were an anomaly! All this knowing that you are no better than him! And from the day I saw you in my parents' home, your smugness, arrogance and false benevolence made me understand that you would be the last man I would ever agree to start a relationship with! "

The fury that animated both of them and the closeness of their exchange left, after this last confession, a strange feeling. Graves made a small movement, his face approaching the one of Credence while the young man, without being able to explain it, put his eyes on the lips of the other. This moment of hesitation passed quickly, and as if covering his spirits, and the pain accompanying Jones' statement, Percival stepped back.

All his anger gradually disappeared as he took a few steps backwards, and the sorrow and suffering that took place on his face broke the younger man's heart. He suddenly realized his cruelty, and he would have given anything to take his words back. Yes Graves had his faults, yes he wasn't sure he could trust him, but that didn't give him the right to push him away like that.

Credence swallowed with difficulty, feeling his throat closing and tears forming in the corner of his eyes.

"I... I shouldn't have said that... " he said, his voice breaking over the last words.

Percival moved his hand, as if to signify that he didn't want to hear anything else. He turned away from Credence, with a resignation that suddenly terrified the younger one. He tried to come closer, but Graves raised his hand to keep him at a distance.

"It doesn't matter. " He sighed, on the verge of crying. "It was a mistake... This whole thing was a mistake, I was really foolish to think that things would be different... I'm so... I'm so fucking tired... I'm sorry I wasted your time. I'm sorry... "

And as he turned his heels to leave, Credence was dreadfully afraid that he would never see him again, that he would disappear on that November night and never come back. He put a hand on his arm, his breathing made difficult by his anguish.

"Percival, I... " he tried.

"No!" the other one interrupted him, breaking free from his touch as if he had burned him. "Now it's your turn to leave me alone. Please. Please, Credence... "

Without being able to look him in the eye, Percival walked away, leaving behind him a young man confused, destabilized, unable to hold him back and trembling, frightened. Everything had been so perfect, so unbelievably perfect for a few hours, why had it all collapsed? Why had everything shattered? Why did it feel so painful in his being to watch Percival walk away?

"And now he's leaving... He's pretty good at that: leaving. "

Gellert's mocking voice was really the last thing he wanted to hear. He was the trigger for all this, the one who had ruined everything, the one who had stolen this perfect moment, the one who had thrown to his face how unpredictable Percy could be. Grindelwald had managed to get back on his feet, almost as if nothing had happened. _I hate you, I hate you so much!_ Credence thought.

"We'd have to go to the hospital, babe..." the German smiled, pulling out a handkerchief to wipe the blood from his swollen face.

What exactly did he believe? That because Graves was gone it meant he had won? He hadn't won anything! He had lost Credence last May and that hadn't changed tonight!

"We're made for each other, you and me. " he continued. "If I can't do it with you, I can't do it with anyone. "

And that was supposed to be his love confession? That stupid and pathetic: you are my last resort? You are the zero degree of all my relationships, so I need to prove to myself that I can win you back? How on earth could he have fallen in love with such a selfish person?

Credence approached him, his hands stuck in his coat pockets to hide his clenched fists, before saying :

"Gellert, this is not what I want. I won't be your second choice, your fallback choice. I wouldn't venture to try something with a man who isn't quite sure of his feelings and what he wants with me. I was in love with you, but after tonight I can serenely say that I have completely moved on. So let's leave it at that, Gellert. "

Grindelwald seemed really surprised. And that was the worst part: he was astonished, not hurt, not sad, just astonished to realize that Credence wasn't just a silly boy ready to fall into his arms after just a few sweet words. The older one frowned.

"You... You reject me ? Is it over between us? "

"It was over long before tonight. " he sighed, suddenly tired of putting up with that perplexed face. "We have nothing more to say to each other, you and I. Now I want you to leave. I don't want to see you again. Never ever again. "

Without a glance back, and with a determined step, he entered the building, followed closely by his group of friends, who looked as if they didn't know where to put themselves. He definitely gave up on Gellert, it was over, forever. But Percy... _Percy?_

A hand rested on his shoulder, and he turned towards the young Goldstein who stood beside him, climbing the stairs at the same pace as him. Queenie had visibly cried, judging by her dripping make-up, no doubt due to her exacerbated empathy. Everyone entered in an almost religious silence in the flat. Tina gently closed the door, being careful not to bother Credence, who was obviously on the verge of tears. In a delicate gesture, Queenie helped the young man to remove his coat before taking him by the hand and inviting him to sit on the sofa with her.

It was Nagini who broke the silence, trying to make humor out of the situation to relax the atmosphere :

"Well! What a show! Who could have predicted that the apple stalker knew how to fight so well! "

Credence raised a blank glance at her, and Nag lost the little smirk she had, obviously worried. He must have looked incredibly pathetic because all his friends seemed anxious in front of his pale face.

"Honey, are you all right? " Queenie asked in her soft voice.

And that was the trigger, like a torpedo in his heart and Credence broke into tears, his rib cage shaken with nervous and painful sobs. The young woman at his side drew him into a gentle embrace, laying kisses on his temples, whispering to him that everything would be all right.

"Oh Cree..." Tina whispered, crying at the condition of her best friend. 

"I don't even know why I'm crying... " he sobbed.

All his friends approached, hugging each other around him, in a big group hug. It was a little awkward, but it reassured him. He felt save, protected.

"I know: you're crying because we still haven't eaten the great birthday cake that Jacob made!" Nagini smiled, trying to hide the fact that she too was on the verge of tears.

Credence laughed through his sobs. He was really happy that his friends were there. He was also grateful that they had let him handle the situation, even if it had been a disaster, it had at least allowed him to settle his score with Gellert. Tina sometimes had the reflex to be much too maternal with him and intervene, but she had taken it upon herself to wait patiently for Credence to need her to get close to him.

"Oh, and while we're at it, I brought tequila!" Nag added.

Everyone laughed in the living room. It was nervous, but it did them a lot of good ... Who could have predicted that this evening would be like this? Who could have predicted that it was going to end up like that? Well, happy 26th birthday, I guess…

* * *

Ten days later, while doing his grocery shopping, Credence found himself behind a silhouette he had seen in his dreams many times since his birthday evening. He hesitated for a moment to put his hand on his shoulder, but simply followed him like a shadow to the cash register to pay. He just took a packet of pasta, so he wouldn't arrive empty-handed. Percival dropped his items on the conveyor belt, still not noticing Credence. In the middle of his purchases, the youngest noticed a bag of apples and a shy smile settled on his face.

"Do you know that apples are hypo-caloric?" he said, echoing Percival's words.

Graves froze, closing his eyes for a few instants, before turning slowly towards Credence. The youngest felt his heart break when he noticed his pale and exhausted face. He looked as if he was at the end of his strength.

"Hi. " Percy murmured.

"Hi," he replied, trying to smile.

Percival stared at him, visibly sorrowful, but also with a certain coldness, a certain bitterness that turned young Jones' stomach. He tried to keep his smile and tender expression, but his hands were shaking and he could feel the black irises burning his skin.

"I am happy to see that you ... "

"I have to go!" Graves interrupted him. "I'm sorry, I have to go. "

He hastened to pay and retrieved his bags. Credence didn't know how to hold him back, but he had to stop him, he had to apologize, they had to talk. It couldn't end like that, not after their smiles, their dancing, the almost kiss... Not after all that.

"Percival, I... "

"Please Credence, don't do this. Please don't. "

His tone was almost imploring, desperate, and without giving him a chance to respond, Graves almost ran out of the grocery store. Credence stood without moving for long seconds, staring at the front door, secretly hoping that Percival would come back. But he did not. He was gone...

"Love is complicated, isn't it? "

The voice of the woman at the cash register brought him out of his thought. She had a sad little pout on her face, patiently waiting for Credence to pay for his pasta package.

Love? Was it love? No, he wasn't in love with Graves! It was different, it was much more complicated than that! Wasn't it? Even in his mind, he couldn't convince himself of that anymore... Maybe, despite everything, Percy was the man of his dreams... And he liked him... very much.... _Just as he was_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I think this chapter took all my energy ^^ I had a hard time writing it and being a little satisfied with it, so feel free to tell me what you think about it. And don't forget there will be a happy ending ^^


	8. Only the end of the world

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my God, I did it!!!! I had so much trouble writing this chapter ^^ It's a bit long, sorry, I hope you'll like it <3

_Weight: 128 lbs (I was stressed, okay!)_

_Cigarettes: 35 a day (I'm screwed anyway, so...)_

_Alcohol: A glass of wine, sometimes ... often ... a little too often ..._

The Christmas break came much faster than Credence had anticipated. He had watched the days go by at breakneck speed, drinking too much coffee for his well-being and falling back entirely into a wobbly diet and cigarette habit. He had plunged into work to try to avoid thinking about Percival, and especially to avoid feeling guilty for acting so cold and heartless. (It wasn't very effective, but at least he was trying...).

For Christmas, he could have chosen to have a party with Nagini, the twins and Jacob, like last year, but he really didn't want to leave Charles alone, especially after the year he had spent. In addition, Tina was spending Christmas Eve with her parents. Therefore, on December 22nd (exactly one month after his last meeting with Percival, but who was counting?) Credence took the train back to his parents home.

As soon as he arrived, his father offered to decorate the house and the tree, and Credence accepted joyfully, returning to his childhood as he placed the star at the top of the Christmas tree.

Charles seemed to be doing much better, especially since Henrietta had decided to leave Julian. She hadn't come home yet, but his father told him that they had called each other and that she had taken a new apartment, alone, while she put her life back in order, promising that she would come back to him when she felt worthy to ask his forgiveness. She had also quit her job on that jerk's show, and was now working for cooking presentations on the same TV station.

This was good news, and Credence was happy that things were getting better for his parents, they both deserved it. And it was just too hard to see them apart, especially after everything they'd been through together.

On December 23rd, Credence and his father stayed in the living room to snack in front of completely ridiculous Christmas movies. Charles had lit the fireplace, and rolled up in his plaid and dressed in his pajamas, Credence felt like a little boy again, especially with the glass of milk and cookies his father had brought him. Except maybe for the fact he had a cigarette in his mouth, it didn't look so cute and childish like that…

He did his best not to think about Graves, but sometimes he let himself go to the memories of his smile, of their dancing in his living room, of that wonderful birthday party before Gellert came to destroy everything. (What a little shit that one! Credence hoped that he spent his holidays alone!) And in those moments, he felt his eyes burning and he had all the trouble in the world to chase away the nascent tears.

His father must have noticed this, because towards the end of the afternoon, he ventured to ask him:

"Is everything all right, Credence? "

And since his son did not feel the strength to confide his feelings and torments to him, he simply smiled and nodded, taking a new breath of nicotine. Charles didn't seem to believe him, but he knew him well enough to know that there was no point in pushing Credence to talk. So instead of asking more questions, he served him a new glass of milk and kissed him on the forehead.

On December 24th, Credence got up late in the morning, having been unable to sleep the night before, constantly turning over in his sheets, remembering Percival's exhausted face at the grocery store. How could his feelings for him have changed so quickly? How could he have missed the shift in his attraction? How could he have been so blind? He knew that Percival had betrayed Gellert and broken his heart by sleeping with his wife, but he too had suffered when his fiancée left him, hadn't he?

_Bad argumentation Credence, that's exactly what happened with Gellert and that doesn't make him a good and forgivable person for that matter?_

Then what? Why was he willing to forgive Percy everything and not Gellert? Because despite his clumsiness, Graves had never hurt him on purpose? Why the hell was everything so complicated?!

Credence and his father spent the afternoon cooking, preparing far more food than they could ever eat together. Charles was going to have leftovers for at least two months. When a choir came to sing at their door, in front of his father's annoyed look, Credence opened a window and shouted, " _Get out of the way! We already have a horrible singer in this house!_ ". This was quite effective and Mr. Jones burst out laughing when his son closed the window. That laugh was definitely in the top 10 of his favorite sounds in the universe.

Around eight o'clock, they sat down at the table, joyfully sharing this carefully prepared meal. Charles hesitated to comment on the weight of his son, which had dropped again. Credence could see it by the way he stared at his wrists with a sad look. But he kept silent, no doubt in order not to hurt his feelings. He preferred to serve him more salmon as if nothing was wrong.

They were both watching another romantic movie when a key turned in the lock of the entrance. Mr. Jones frowned, giving Credence an interrogative look, and he simply shrugged. Then, in the frame of the door of the small salon, Henrietta's slim silhouette appeared. She was barely wearing any make-up, dressed in the large beige coat that Charles had given her two years earlier. Her eyes were red, she had probably cried before deciding to come tonight. She was beautiful, much prettier without all the jewelry and foundation she had to wear for her TV shopping show.

"Good evening Charles..." she whispered with a smile. "Hi, my baby. " she added to her son's attention.

After a sweet smile and without a sound, Credence slipped out of the living room and went up to his room. His parents needed to be alone. And to talk face to face in particular! ( _You know : TO TALK ! That thing you can't do with a certain person...)_

In the silence of his room, the young man thought that he didn't even have Percival's phone number. How was he supposed to talk to him? Was he allowed to talk to him? Perhaps Percy needed time and a little distance. He had been kind enough to leave Credence alone for several months after his crying fit at the store, the younger one might well give him Christmas vacation before coming back to him. Yes, it was the best thing to do. Wait a little longer.

On the morning of December 25th, Credence was greeted by the smiling faces of his parents. They were radiant, exchanging tender, loving glances like two teenagers. It was a little embarrassing but so reassuring that their son did not make a single remark.

After a copious breakfast, (gosh, did his father wanted him to blow up like a balloon?) they opened the gifts that each had bought. Charles and Henrietta had gone on another wild spree, spending endlessly to please their son. When Credence pointed out how excessive it was, they simply replied that he had had a difficult year and that he deserved all these gifts more than enough. He felt a bit ridiculous with his Edgar Allan Poe book for his father (even though it was a very nice piece of work) and his silk scarf for his mother. But his parents only thanked him warmly, Henrietta holding him close to her for a long time, repeating several times: "I love you, my baby. "

After the exchange of gifts, Credence went back up to his room, leaving his parents alone in the small living room, sitting on the sofa against each other. He settled into bed, turning on his computer to launch Netflix. He decided on a cartoon before settling comfortably in his blankets and pillows.

Around 2pm, he forced himself out of bed, and was surprised to find his parents finishing getting ready to go out. Charles was wearing a three-piece suit and Henrietta had opted for a beautiful emerald dress that fitted her beautifully.

"You look pretty, Mom. " Credence complimented her from the top of the stairs.

She looked up at him, smiling tenderly, before realizing that her son was still in his pyjamas.

"Credence, you're not ready? " she wondered.

He frowned, not sure what she was talking about. Weren't his parents only going out as a couple? Was he supposed to come somewhere?

"For what? " he asked.

" The Graves wedding anniversary! They got married on Christmas Day forty years ago today. Aren't you coming? "

She seemed really disappointed, and Credence was tempted to accept, but he remembered that Percival would probably be there and that he had promised to leave him alone for another ten days. So as he ran a hand through his hair, he sighed:

"No mom, I don't feel like it. "

"Percival will be there, still unmarried. " She said with a wink, before turning to the mirror in the entrance to put on an earring.

"Yes, and probably still just as unpredictable ... " he replied, turning away to go back to his room.

His mother had a little disapproving hiccup, the same one she had used so often when he was a child before she reprimanded him. And even though her son was 26 years old, she did not hesitate to tell him in a disgruntled tone:

"Oh, Credence, a little compassion! It is always a very difficult time of the year for him. "

"Yes I know, since the European woman left him, blah blah blah." He replied, disappearing into his room.

But before he closed the door, Henrietta said in a very astonished tone:

"The woman? Who said anything about a woman? No, he was engaged to a man, a German, cruel person, those people. "

Credence was convinced that he had heard the sound of a derailed vinyl. Or maybe it was the sound your life made when your whole universe collapses? His eyes widened disproportionately, his heart missed a beat, and his insides knotted so violently that he was afraid to throw up all the cookies he had eaten today.

At an astonishing speed, he left his room to run down the stairs, standing breathlessly next to his mother, staring at her wildly through the mirror.

"What's that? What did you just say? " he asked.

Henrietta stared at him, surprised by his behavior. He must have looked like a madman, but his heart was beating far too fast, resonating in his ears, for him to care. Instead of worrying, Henrietta touched up her make-up and replied:

"That he was engaged to a German, a man he had met while studying abroad. Poor Percy, he was only 23 years old, and he was heartbroken. " She said sadly. "It was eight years ago, and I still remember it. Viviane was terrified that he would hurt himself. It took months before she was able to bring him back to the United States. "

 ** _Bam._** Credence had just seen his whole year shattered. No, it couldn't be... It couldn't be true! There had to be a mistake, it couldn't be true. Because if what he assumed was the truth, it meant that Gellert had horribly deceived him, that he had manipulated him beyond his feelings. No, no, he couldn't have been fooled like that, could he? And Gellert couldn't have been that despicable, right?

Credence stood in front of his mother, taking her arms in his hands, almost shaking her, as he asked her, more and more panicked;

"Mom, tell me the whole story! "

"Oh, now you're interested... " she smiled, trying to get back to her lipstick.

"Mom, please! "

He had almost screamed, and Henrietta was a little shocked by his eagerness and his outburst. Charles watched them without saying anything, simply narrowing his eyes, worried about his son's anguish. After a small sigh, Mrs. Jones took her son's fingers from her arms, holding one of his hands in hers, and finally related what had happened to Percival eight years earlier:

"Well, fine. Percy left to study and travel in Europe after high school, and at the age of 21, barely an adult, he met this man. I don't know his name, Viviane calls him GG because those are his initials and I just know that he was four years older than Percival. Viviane and William never met him. So Percy falls madly in love, he settles down with him, it's happiness, everything is beautiful, and after two years, they get engaged. GG buys him a ring, he does everything in the best possible setting since he proposes to him in Paris. A month later, a few days before Christmas, Percival comes home from university and discovers him in bed with a woman. Poor Percy was at the bottom of the abyss, Viviane was very afraid for him. "

 **OH.MY. GOD**! Grindelwald, **_son of a bitch_**! How could he have done such a thing! He had lied to him! He had lied to him and Credence had believed him so easily, just because Percy had offended his pride at that stupid buffet! How could Gellert have been so deceitful, so cruel? He had broken poor Percival's heart without any consideration before he set his sights on Credence eight years later and did exactly the same thing to him! What a monster! And how could he have been so stupid, so naive? How could he have not seen that Graves was the perfect man all along? How could he have been so mistaken? All those awful things he said to him, all because of a horrible lie.

Credence remained frozen for several seconds, unable to get out of the turmoil of his thoughts. Everything lined up: Gellert's hurtful sentences, his acid tone, Percival's strange behavior in front of him, his clumsy attempts to keep Credence away from Grindelwald or to make him understand that he was "absolutely not worthy of him". Damn it, how could he have been so blind!

Percy was the good guy in the story; he was the valiant knight that the vile Gellert had tried to destroy. How could anyone be so false, so unscrupulous, so hateful, selfish and sadistic! Credence had been in a relationship with a psychopath! God, he would have liked to kill him! He should never have intervened at his birthday party, he should have let Percival take all his anger out on that asshole!

He swallows with difficulty, moving away from his mother, trying to assimilate the information as best he could. He had to see Percy, talk to him, to apologize. My God, he had to beg him to forgive him! He had to see him today, now, right now. RIGHT NOW!

"Give me 10 minutes!" he shouted to his parents before going up to his room.

Like a fury, he took his clothes out of his closet, throwing on the floor those he found inappropriate or ridiculous. He was so angry with himself, angry that he had listened to the most dreadful man in the history of mankind! (Well, maybe not that much, but at the time it made sense in his mind) He should have suspected the trickery, the atrocious manipulation! Especially after discovering Ruby in the German's bathroom. He should have understood! For fuck’s sake, he should have known!

With trembling hands and shortness of breath, he put on a black shirt that he tucked into his high waist white pants. He quickly combed his hair, tying it in a bun, from which several locks fell out. He washed his teeth, put on some fragrance and prayed that he wouldn't smell too bad. (That would have been the worst: to scare Percy away because of his smell). Then, after one last quick look in the mirror, he ran down the stairs to join his parents in the hallway. He put on his shoes under the surprised and concerned gaze of Charles and Henrietta.

"Is everything all right, my darling?" his mother asked.

"We have to go, we're already late! " he said, breathlessly, grabbing the car keys from his father's hands before going outside.

His parents followed him, slightly uncertain. They had never seen him like this, and to be honest, Credence had never felt as upset as he did today. They arrived at the Graves's home in half the usual time, the young Jones having driven at a staggering speed under the panicked and shocked gaze of his parents.

After giving his coat to one of the employees hired for the event, and the car keys to Charles, Credence abandoned his parents to sneak among the guests in the large living room. He tiptoed around, looking for Percival. He twisted his hands in a nervous tic, forcing himself to try to keep breathing normally while his heart was screaming over and over: **_find him!_**

Fortunately for him, he quickly noticed the memorable silhouette of young Graves. Credence took a deep breath to calm himself, lifted his chin to give himself some allure before moving towards Percival. He was a few steps away from him when the older one turned in his direction. The polite smile on his face faded as soon as his eyes fell on Credence. He was thinner, still exhausted, but strangely serene, as if he had given up everything that had once troubled him in front of the young journalist. And that was really not a good sign...

Percival apologized to the group of people he was talking to, before walking towards Credence. The youngest could not hold back a shy smile, continuing to twist his fingers to prevent himself from hanging around Percy's neck, begging him for forgiveness, in front of everyone. The silence between them was heavy, and Credence was so distressed, so overwhelmed by his emotions, that he almost wanted to burst into tears.

"Thank you... Thank you for inviting me. " He stammered.

Percival kept a neutral, cold air, identical to the one he had had in their conversation last year. It didn't bode well.

"I didn't. " Graves sighed. "I guess it was my mother who must have thought it was a good idea… "

To escape his sharp gaze, Credence lowered his eyes. He discovered that Percival was wearing a tie with snowmen so ugly that it rivaled the deer-headed sweater. This detail might have made him smile, if he wasn't so vulnerable in front of Graves's dark irises. With a trembling hand, he put a lock of hair back behind his ear, before clearing his throat and saying:

"So... "

"So..." Percival repeated, visibly annoyed by the situation.

It all had an unpleasant taste of déjà vu, and last time it didn't end well. Credence was really hoping for a better ending today. The younger one opened his mouth to speak, but Seraphina appeared beside Percival, putting her hand on his shoulder, before turning to Credence. She raised an eyebrow, visibly surprised to see him, saying in a mocking tone:

"Well, well, if it isn't Credence the bunny… "

She was really unpleasant, especially with her sneaky little smile. Credence blushed, keeping bitter reflections that came to his mind for himself, simply replying politely:

"Hello Seraphina. "

"Hello Credence. I didn't expect to see you here at all, I thought only friends were invited. "

Credence bit the inside of his cheek. After her malicious little spade, Sera turned away from him as if nothing had happened, before tiptoeing to put a kiss on Percival's cheek. Then she addressed a provocative smile to the youngest. _Don't touch him!_ he thought, possessive. Dirty hyena! She did it on purpose!

"Percival, your father would like to begin his speech. " she said afterwards.

Percy finally left Credence's eyes, turning to her. He smiled at his colleague, with that smile that made butterflies fly in the belly of the young journalist, before answering:

"Yes, of course. I'll be there in a minute. "

She simply nodded before walking away, not without giving Credence a nasty look. He almost wanted to stick his tongue out at her. Percival looked at him again, slightly embarrassed, and as he was about to walk away, Credence hastened to say :

"Listen, I owe you an apology. "

The older one blinked several times, surprised. And as he said nothing, Credence continued:

"I owe you an apology for what I said to you on the night of my birthday. It was cruel and inappropriate, and I feel very badly about it. And I owe you an apology about Gellert too... He said that you slept with his wife and I believed him... I was stupid enough to believe what he told me... He said you broke his heart. "

Percy turned violently pale, his eyes widening as he realized where the misunderstanding was. That didn't excuse Credence's behavior, but he hoped it would at least help him understand why the young man had reacted the way he did. After a small throat clearing, Percival looked down at the ground, frowning his eyebrows as he said:

"Actually, it's not like that at all... He's the one who left me for a woman. It was me who surprised him in our room. It was my heart that he broke, it was me the fiancé, his future husband, it was him who cheated on me and I… I had to leave… And so I left... "

He raised his gaze, and Credence hated himself even more. He wasn't the type to wish people bad luck, but God, he really hoped that Gellert would one day be punished by the universe! Karma is a bitch so they say, it was time to prove it!

Percival had bright eyes, but he still maintained that imperturbable air that Credence had such a hard time reading. A painful ball formed at the back of his throat and he had to take it on himself not to grab Percy in his arms. He felt that only his touch could soothe him, but he was far too afraid to be pushed away. After a short silence, he said:

"I am very, truly sorry. Now I know why you were behaving so strangely with him... And why you hit him, and rightly so. I think I would have aimed more at the crotch. In fact, that's what I should have done... "

Graves seemed slightly uncomfortable, and after a glance around him, he sighed. He was openly looking for a way out of this conversation.

"Credence I must... "

"Could we talk? " he interrupted him. "Somewhere a little quieter, if that's okay. "

"Uh, I... "

"Percy, please. " he insisted, begging.

Percival closed his eyes, inhaling deeply, as if to escape the imploring gaze of the one in front of him. Then, after a short silence, he just nodded, following Credence outside of the large living room. The younger one opted for a small office in the back, where the guests' coats had been stored. After closing the door, Graves leaned against it, waiting for Credence to speak. The tension was almost palpable. His heart was beating incredibly fast, and he had never felt so nervous. Playing with the edge of his shirt sleeve, he confessed in a trembling voice:

"I have... I have something I would really like to tell you. The other time at Gemma's, you told me... You told me that you liked me the way I was and I just wanted to tell you... To tell you that for me it's the same... That it's reciprocal. You keep wearing those stupid things your mother gives you, your tie is an example of that, and you act like a pretentious fool too many times. You seem cold and it often feels like you despise everyone, when in fact you're just afraid of being judged. And you have this unbearable gift of always saying things in the least subtle way possible. But you are a good man, and in all sincerity you are dangerously close to my ideal man. And I like you... very much... just as you are... maybe even more than that, to tell the truth... "

Percival frowned, detailing Credence with a strange look. He seemed confused, unsure if he could trust him after what had happened. And it was painful to realize that Credence might have broken a connection between them forever, just with a few hurtful words. Percival shook his head before speaking in an insecure voice:

"But the night of your birthday, you said... "

"I know what I said. " Credence interrupted him gently, approaching him, not as close as he would have liked, but he was afraid to make Percy uncomfortable. "And I was wrong! I was so, so horribly wrong to tell you that! I didn't mean it and I'm sorry! That's exactly what you said about me: I too often let my emotions take over without thinking about what I'm saying and what the consequences will be. And I wanted you to be perfect so badly that I forgot you were... well... human. "

And he really didn't want to start crying, but obviously his eyes decided otherwise because as he was finishing his sentence, his voice broke and tears rolled down his cheeks. And Grave's silence was worse than anything else. He seemed lost, unable to know what he could say or how to react. Taking a deep breath to calm himself, Credence wiped his cheeks quickly before taking a step backwards, as if to give Percival back a safe distance. With more regular breathing and a less desperate voice, he added in a shy smile:

"So if you ever... If you ever want us to try something together... If it's not too late, and I haven't destroyed everything, and you want us to get to know each other truly, without our pride and prejudices, I think it could be fun. I think it could be great, actually. Completely hopeless, and yet really desired. "

Then nothing... No answer... Just the Grave's look on his face, burning his skin. This silence seemed to last an eternity, an eternity that Credence's heart could barely survive. Percy opened and closed his mouth several times, finally breaking away from the door to stand straight in front of the youngest, just a step away from him. And as he was about to speak, Percival's father was heard doing microphones tests before asking if anyone had seen his son.

"Sorry, I have to go!" He apologized before he left the room, as if this was the best possible opportunity for him to escape the confession he had just heard.

Credence remained frozen for a long time, suddenly feeling abandoned and lost. Gathering his courage, he left the small office to return to the large living room.

In the middle of the guests, he found Tina and Newt, and he stood next to them after his childhood friend had kissed him on his cheek. Percy was in front of the crowd, next to his parents on the small stage, with Seraphina standing right behind him. What a glue! She had no business being on that stage! She couldn't get away from Percival for 5 minutes? William Graves waited a few more moments for the silence to settle down completely before starting his speech:

"Ladies and Gentlemen. We have invited you here today to celebrate one of the most beautiful days of our lives. I married this wonderful woman 40 years ago, and it is without a doubt the best decision I ever made. We were very young, barely 21 years old each, with far too many dreams for both of us. And it continues today.

A few laughs and some soft exclamations rose in the room. Credence was unable to take his eyes off Percy, who seemed lost in thought, his eyebrows furrowed.

"And we have the honor and happiness of having our son, Percival. He has always been our pride, despite what some may have said or thought. And we couldn't be prouder of him on this special day, because I am pleased to announce that he has just been invited to become the new partner of one of the largest law firms in London. "

Credence's breath remained stuck in his lungs. Percival was leaving? He was leaving for London? Why was he leaving? No, he couldn't leave! What the hell was the matter with everybody about that stupid city?! His heart started beating in a disordered rhythm and Tina turned to him, worried. After some applause, and a polite smile from Percy to the assembly, William continued:

"And may I also add that he is taking his charming long time friend and colleague in law, Seraphina, with him. And since we are among friends, I can tell you without fear that Seraphina will soon be something else in law. "

Credence thought his heart was going to explode. What? No, no it was impossible, he had misunderstood... And Seraphina wasn't blushing, she wasn't taking her place next to Percival and resting her head on his shoulder. The pain in his heart almost made him faint. It was a nightmare... it was torture... So that was Percy's answer? Marry this woman? Had Credence screwed up that badly?

He must have been awfully pale because Tina asked Newt to watch him while she walked away to the buffet to bring him a glass of water and something to eat.

"I ask you all to raise your glasses for Percival and his Sera! " Mr. Graves said, with a big smile. 

"To Percival and Sera! " all the guests repeated

"No! No, that can't be true! "

Credence noticed that he had screamed out his despair when all eyes turned to him. A heavy and awkward silence settled in the room. He was going to die, he was going to die here and now, his heart was hurting too much. He was so hurt that he felt as if he was detaching himself from his body. His hands began to shake and he did his best to hold back the burning tears that were threatening to escape. In a small voice, he babbled:

"It's... It's just... It's just sad that the United States has to say goodbye to such... such a capable pair of lawyers. To lose one of its most brilliant lawyers. To lose a wonderful man, in fact... To let him go... "

He met Percival's worried gaze, and that was the end. The end of his courage, the end of his fight to keep a semblance of dignity in front of his parents' friends. _Percy... Percy, please..._ A painful sob shook his ribcage, and it was when he put his hand over his mouth to choke a second one that he noticed that his cheeks were covered with tears. His vision became blurred, and air became increasingly rare in his lungs. He had to leave, he had to save what little was left of him...

Ignoring the looks on his face, Credence ran away towards the entrance. Suffering spread through his veins like a poison and without being able to control himself, he began to suffocate, unable to find air, to calm down, to sort out his mind. He hadn't had an attack like this in more than ten years, and his hands were trembling dangerously when one of the employees brought him his coat. Credence did his best to put his trench coat on, but his wheezy breathing, tear-filled eyes and sorrow prevented him from doing this task. This simple, banal, stupid task...

His legs got weak under him and he found himself kneeling on the carpet, almost convulsing in his sobs, hearing in the distance the music that had begun to play in the large living room. Then Tina appeared in front of him, crouching down to take his face in her hands. She looked panicked, her eyes shining with tears.

"Credence? Credence, breathe. You must breathe. " she said.

He shook his head, this simple gesture almost snatched a cry of pain from him. Then, between two difficult respirations, he said:

"I can't... I can't... "

"Is he all right?" Newt asked, moving towards the two friends.

"I have to get him home, get him out of here. " Tina explained without taking her eyes off Credence.

Yes, he had to leave, he had to run away and never come back... Why? Why was it always so painful? Why wasn't it him in the big living room instead of Seraphina? Why her? Because of him! Because of his inability to think before speaking and always act too late! He should never have spoken so cruelly to Percy and let him go on his birthday, he should have stopped him at the grocery store last month, he should have been more patient and understanding with him... He should have done so much, and he missed his chance.

"Ok, take my car!" Newt announced, pulling Credence out of his thoughts, handing his keys to Tina.

"Are you sure? "

"Yes, I'll go home with my brother. " he assured.

"Thank you Newt. "

The young Scamander walked towards Credence, helping his girlfriend get him back on his feet and put his coat on. Tina repeated reassuring words, asking her friend to breathe, to focus on his heartbeat to calm himself. The buzz in his ears diminished a little, but he couldn't calm down at all. 

"What's going on? Credence, darling?" his mother asked as she walked towards the small group.

"I'm going to take him home, Henrietta. " Tina announced.

He didn't want to stay here, he didn't want his parents to see him like this, let alone have Percival come to look at him with pity. He didn't want his pity! He wanted his smile, his smell, his laughter, his dark and tender eyes, his hands, his body against his own as they danced. He wanted it so badly, so desperately... He was pathetic, broken, lost. Nothing made sense anymore, he felt as if someone had had fun ripping his heart out before trampling on it. So much suffering... My God, this horrible pain... Even when he had discovered Ruby in Gellert's bathroom, he hadn't been in that much agony...

Credence let his mother draw him into a gentle embrace before moving away from her, his throat burning terribly, his lungs compressed by the lack of air.

"I need to get out ... I need to get out, I can't breathe ... " he told Tina.

She nodded, supporting him as best she could as Newt opened the door to let them out. All his muscles were tearing him apart, and he felt like throwing up, but the fresh air did him a world of good. Tina led him to her boyfriend's car, and after opening one of the doors, she helped him to sit down and crouched down in front of him again. She took his face, caressing his tear-rimmed cheeks with her thumbs, gently repeating to him that he needed to breathe.

_Breathe..._

_Breathe..._

The air rushed back into his lungs and he made a plaintive sound, his chest cavity and throat excruciatingly painful. Little by little, he managed to match his breathing with the one of the young woman in front of him, regaining his senses and a certain calmness. No relief, just a shifting of the pain from his lungs to his heart and mind.

"Are you going to be okay? " Tina asked after a few minutes listening to her best friend's breathing calm down.

He nodded, his mind fogged with sadness and fatigue. Or perhaps it was the return of oxygen. Tina put his seat belt on him, as if he were a child, before closing the door. Credence put his head against the window. His eyes kept crying, but he didn't have the strength to really sob.

The car started, and the ride was made in a long and tragic silence. Tina often stroked his cheek, sometimes running a hand over his knee or through his hair. Then, at some point, when Credence thought he had cried all the tears of his body, the name " _Percival_ " came to his mind, like letters of ink engraved on his eyelids, in his soul and in his heart. And a new wave of tears began: those of the hard realization that he had lost him. Percival Graves was definitely the man of his dreams, and he had lost him. He had lost him because of Gellert, but mostly because of his stupidity. It was useless to put everything on Grindelwald's shoulders, he had on his side shown incredible foolishness ...

In front of his condition, Tina decided to park on the side of the road, so she could take him in her arms. She cradled him tenderly, stroking his hair, letting him cling to her while Credence almost screamed between his tears.

"Oh Credence, why didn't you say anything? I thought you had moved on after your birthday."

"I lost him Tina, I was stupid and I lost him... " he cried. "He's going to marry that horrible woman! "

"Oh, Credence, I'm so sorry... " she said before she put a kiss on his head.

"I never want to fall in love again, it hurts too much... Oh Tina, it hurts too much, I want it to stop... "

"Oh my darling... Oh Credence, do you love him that much? "

Yes, yes, he loved him so much that he wondered what he was going to do with the rest of his life... He had always known how to protect himself from tragic love affairs, and in one year he had experienced two atrociously violent heart breaks. The pain was unbearable, he felt as if his heart was bleeding as much as his eyes were crying.

"I was at his mercy before I even realized it, and now he's going to leave... Why, oh my God, why? I'm so stupid... "

Tina held him against her for a long time, whispering to him that everything would be all right in the end, that he had nothing to blame himself for, even though Credence was convinced that it was the opposite. He wanted to forget everything, to go back in time to that famous Christmas buffet. Never meet Percival that way, never push him back at the grocery store, never fall under Gellert's spell, forget, forget everything and start all over again.

His best friend took him back to his parents house. She took the time to help him take off his coat and shoes before accompanying him to his room. She helped him put on his pajamas, made no remarks about his lethargic state or his emaciated body. She helped him lie down, sliding him under his blankets. She closed the curtains and sat on the edge of the bed, stroking his hair until he finally fell into a dreamless sleep. With a little luck, he would manage to never open his eyes...

* * *

The next two days were painful, long, endless and unbearable. Credence was locked in a silence that his parents could not manage to break. He needed time, he needed to be alone, to atone for his suffering by singing at the top of his voice and drinking vodka. Yes, that was exactly what he needed. (It was his downstairs neighbor who was going to be happy...) And despite their love and tenderness, Credence had a hard time with the perpetually worried look of his parents, as if he was a fragile creature that needed to be protected.

Newt, who was supposed to bring Tina back to New York on the evening of December 27th, proposed to Credence to take him and he accepted. He couldn't see himself staying any longer under Charles' pitying gaze and Henrietta's sad smiles. His parents had just found each other again, they must had a thousand things to say to each other, he wasn't going to take that away from them. And in all sincerity, even if he was happy for them, he had a lot of trouble living in the midst of their love and their obvious happiness to be together.

A few minutes before his scheduled departure time, he took his suitcase down to the lobby, checking that he had everything he needed. As he was looking to see if he had received a message from Tina or Newt, he realized that his phone had run out of battery. He had completely forgotten to plug it in the day before... Great... Incredible... Damn, was his guardian angel on sabbatical or what? He had been assigned to a trainee as a "lucky star"? Such bad luck !

After a long sigh, he asked Charles if he could borrow his phone to send a message. His father accepted distractedly, completely absorbed in his reading. Credence looked up Tina's number in the phone book, scrolling through the names.

**_Goldstein Queenie_ **

**_Goldstein Tina_ **

**_Graves Percival_ **

The young man remained stuck on the last name for a long time. Did his father have Percy's number? But why? He had never seen them talk and Charles had never mentioned the young Graves. Walking towards the small living room, leaning against the door frame, hands slightly shaking, Credence asked :

"Dad, why do you have Percival's number? "

Charles raised his head so quickly towards him that he was afraid he had hurt his neck. His father blushed slightly, closing his book, stuttering a weak: "Ah... Uh.", writhing in the sofa, like a child who has done something foolish. Credence narrowed his eyes.

"Dad? " he insisted.

Charles passed a hand over his face, sighing heavily before saying :

"He had asked me not to say anything... "

The heart of Credence accelerated. He walked into the room, standing in front of his father. 

"What are you talking about? "

"Last May, when you came to the house after what Gellert did to you, it was... It was Percival who warned me... "

Credence blinked several times.

"What? But I thought it was Queenie who called you. " He said, unsure.

His father took a deep breath, his eyes lowered to the carpet patterns that suddenly looked very interesting. Then he explained:

"No. Actually Percy ran into you at the grocery store and he was extremely worried about you. He saw that you weren't well at all and he didn't want to leave you alone. He called Viviane to get your mother's number, but with everything going on, the separation, Julian, and all that, Viviane gave him my number instead. He called me, explained to me your conversation at the grocery store and how bad you looked and that's why I called you to offer to come over to the house. "

So that meant... It meant that Percy had been looking out for him all along? Did it mean that without him he would have been prostrate in his apartment for weeks after the event with Gellert? That Percival was a good man was now an established fact, but that was beyond what Credence deserved. My God, he had insulted him, he had even hit him that day! And Percy had still decided to help him? He didn't deserve it... He didn't deserve him.

"But... But why didn't you tell me? "

His father finally looked up at him. He looked sorry for having hidden the truth from his son, especially when he saw his distraught expression.

"Percival asked me not to tell you. " He answered calmly. "He told me that you already find him rude and intrusive enough as it was. And since you kept saying how much he annoyed you, I thought it was the best solution? "

Credence sits in one of the chairs, feeling his legs shake dangerously. He was even more confused now. He turned the information around in his head for a moment before he ventured to ask:

"So you knew about Gellert? Did you know that he was his ex-fiancé? "

"No, he didn't tell me. He didn't know exactly why you weren't well, but he assumed it was the German's fault. He explained to me that that bastard was a toxic person and that it was probably because of him that you looked so unhappy. And he just asked me for your address in case you need help after that. "

It was comforting to know that his father didn't know the connection between Gellert and Percival, it made it less difficult to deal with. Charles had not lied to him because he wanted to, but because Percy thought he was protecting him by hiding his involvement in his recovery. _Oh Percy... Percy..._ Why did he have to be so wonderful?

"And you... You've been talking ever since? " he said, his voice trembling, trying to swallow the painful ball that formed at the back of his throat.

"We've talked a few times. " Charles confessed. "Mainly poetry. He's passionate about Edgar Allan Poe, maybe even more than you are. "

And this information reminded Credence of the gift he had received upon his return to New York. The flowers, the poem, the note that said, " _I know it sounds strange, and you don't realize it yet, but I'm telling you knowingly: someday this pain will be usefull to you._ " The unsigned note... Credence had sent a message to his father to thank him, but he never specified that he was talking about the irises and the Poe quote and not about his visit.

And suddenly everything came together in his mind: the connection between that note and what Percy had gone through because of Gellert, the similarity of their stories, even though Grave's was much more tragic. And above all: on the evening of his birthday Percival had shown up at his door like a prince charming out of a dream, whereas Credence had never given him his address. God, how could he have been so stupid!

"So ... So the flowers ... The flowers and the poem, it wasn't you? " he said, trying to confirm his suppositions.

"What flowers?" his father wondered, raising an eyebrow.

"The bunch of irises and the poem that I received when I got back to New York... "

"Sorry Credence, I don't know what you're talking about. "

Oh my God... OH MY GOD!!! But it was worse than anything else! Percival was not just the man he loved, he was the love of his life! How much chance was there in the Universe that Percy, in the middle of all the writings of Edgar Poe, would choose precisely his favorite poem ? Damn it, but it was his soul mate and he had let him go! What the hell was wrong with him?

Credence leapt to his feet, running into the hallway, rummaging through one of the drawers to find his father's car keys. He was completely panicked, his hands trembling, his heart pounding. He didn't know exactly what he was going to do, but for God's sake, he had to try something!

"Credence, what are you doing?" his mother wondered when she came into the room.

"I have to... I have to catch up with Percy! " he said, finally finding the keys. "I have to hold him back, I can't let him go, I have to do something! "

"But my darling, Percival's plane took off last night. " She admitted sadly.

Ok, he wanted a meeting with his lucky star or his guardian angel now! There was no way the whole galaxy would league against him like that! What was that, a hidden camera? A setup? The new fashionable game for angels: **_how to make Credence suffer as much as possible_**? Who was the writer of his life? Who was the master of destiny who had fun playing with his heart and his hopes? An alcoholic, single and depressed man who was taking revenge on him?

Good God, where was his happy ending, for fuck's sake! He wanted a fucking happy ending! A happy ending, with Graves laughing in the garden, drinking orange juice with "Happy Together" from The Turtles in the background, like in a commercial! He wanted a slow motion on their first kiss, a sensual montage on their first time, shots of Percy's eyes and smiles, head full of memories, Polaroid photos on all the walls of his apartment! He didn't want that reality where he found himself crying in his mother's arms while Percy was on the other side of the planet with Seraphina. It was too lame, sad and painful as an ending! Nobody would have signed for a script like that! It was garbage!

"Oh my baby!" Henrietta whispered, stroking his hair.

"I lost the man of my life... Mom, I lost the love of my life... "

"Of course not, my love. It's all right, Credence, you're so young, my darling, you'll meet someone else. "

"I don't want someone else, I want him! " he cried. "I'm in love! Oh mom, I missed everything... Why did I realize it so late? Why was I so stupid! "

"Oh my baby... " she repeated, hardly bearing the state he was in.

Percy was gone, he had lost him, and he was going to have to live the rest of his life knowing that he had made the man in his life run away. Perfect, the future looked bright!

* * *

Despite Tina's protests, Credence decided to stay alone in his apartment until New Year's Eve. He needed to reflect on his life, to sort out his existence, to fall back into a pathetic larval state, writing in his diary how much he hated himself. All this while listening to shitty music, drinking wine or vodka, and eating (sometimes... in fact almost never...) instant noodles. Good plan!

He was wearing his favorite white T-shirt, the one that stank the depression, moving like a zombie between his bedroom, kitchen and living room. He had promised Tina that he would send her a message every morning to let her know he was okay, but as he got out of bed around 2:00 p.m., it turned into an afternoon message that came down to " _Still alive. Kisses._ "

On the morning of December 30, his stomach was hurting terribly. This was probably related to the fact that he hadn't eaten since... since when exactly? He didn't even know when a food worthy of the name had passed his lips. In an action slowed down by fatigue and aches, Credence got out of bed.

His days were punctuated by a difficult awakening around 2:00 p.m., a glass of wine, a quick shower, another glass of alcohol, cigarettes, before he collapsed back on the bed or sofa, contemplating the ceiling and crying silently, listening to Mariah Carey's "Without you" endlessly.

_No I can't forget tomorrow_

_When I think of all my sorrow_

_When I had you there but then I let you go_

_And now it's only fair that I should let you know_

_What you should know_

_I can't live_

_If living is without you_

_I can't live_

_I can't give anymore_

It was a real wreck, and he was aware of it. But he didn't know how to get up, how to behave. He would have to go back to reality some day, he couldn't run away forever... Or maybe Charles would agree to let him go and bury himself in their cottage in Vermont... Yes, so he could sing all day long and only break the ears of the birds and moose. Great plan!

Grabbing his cell phone, he plugged it in to charge it, waiting for it to turn on again to check his messages. The cell phone started vibrating frantically for several minutes.

He had countless messages from Tina and Nagini, but also from his parents and Queenie, Jacob and Newt. Well, it was time to get back into the social world, even if it was as a heartbroken piece of garbage... After two full days of drinking until seeing Percy everywhere, it was time to get his shit together! Or maybe it could wait until tomorrow... Or next month... Or another life. He locked his phone and dragged himself to his kitchen. He was staring at his empty fridge when the doorbell rang.

His heart leapt to his chest as he tried to suppress the faintest hope of finding Percy behind that door. He unlocked the door with trembling hands, and he was a little (very much) disappointed to see the unhappy faces of his friends on the other side. Tina seemed angry, Queenie worried and Nagini ready to shake him until he recognized that love was only a succession of disappointments. Without a word, he stepped aside and waved them in. They did not hesitate, barging into his apartment like three little tornadoes. Nagini hastily opened a window, declaring that "a dead fucking animal wouldn't smell like his fucking place! "

"We're going to Las Vegas! " Tina announced.

"We are? Who's "we"?" Credence asked.

"Me, Tina, Queenie, and your cute little ass! " replied Nag.

He tried to protest, but Tina put her index finger on his lips before saying in an authoritative voice:

"The four of us are leaving for the New Year’s Eve, just like in the good old days! So go take a shower, do something with the nest that serves as your hair and join us downstairs once you are presentable! Queenie and Nag will take care of your suitcase and passport and I pay for the trip. "

He didn't really have a reason to say no. In fact, he had none, and Las Vegas would always be better than letting himself be wasted in his apartment until the end of time. Or until his landlord kicked him out because of his musical taste, that was another option. After he nodded, Tina took her finger from his lips and gently pushed him towards the bathroom.

In the small room, the mirror gave him an atrocious reflection: he had dark purple circles under his red eyes, pale skin and emaciated cheeks. He looked sick... He looked " _like a ridiculous and depressive kid, visibly suffering from eating disorders_. " Damn it, Percy was so right...

The warm water did him good and he allowed himself to cry, lying to himself that the salt drops weren't coming from his tired eyes. Then he dried himself, combed his hair carefully, and went out with a towel around his waist. Nag had prepared some clothes for him on the chair by the bathroom door: old sweatpants and a vaguely gray T-shirt. He grabbed them before returning to the foggy little room, ignoring Queenie's sad gaze as she discovered his body thin enough to reveal his ribs.

When he came out of the bathroom for the second time, there was only Queenie left in the apartment. She was waiting for him by the front door. The window had been closed, the few dishes had been done, and everything seemed in order so that he could go to Las Vegas with his friends. After a last glance around him, Credence put on his coat, eating quickly the cake that Queenie was handing him, grabbed his phone, and followed her outside. He checked several times to make sure he had locked the door and then went down the stairs of his building.

He let the young Goldstein get out to the car, explaining that he was just going to check his mail before coming. This was not to save time, since he had no real reason to stay home alone... Except perhaps the daydream he had of Percival appearing one morning on his doorstep...

He hurried to collect the letters and advertisements piled up in the small box, throwing the second category in the common trash can. He had received Christmas cards from some of his parents' friends, Mrs. Goldstein of course, and a letter from Gemma who had gone to France for the holidays. He put everything in his pocket. And finally, after a long and deep sigh, he left the building.

And at that very moment, Credence sincerely thought he had lost his mind. Well, he hadn't been in a particularly normal state since December 25, but now he was really starting to hallucinate without being under the influence of alcohol. It was disturbing. Maybe it was the lack of food? Maybe it was like in the desert when you see an oasis when in truth there's only sand as far as the eye can see? Or maybe his brain was just showing him that he wasn't getting enough nutrients to continue working normally and he was quitting... Kind of like his heart making a funny loop in his chest.

There, in front of him, under the thin snow of the end of December, Percival Graves, in all his magnificence, was waiting at the bottom of his building. Credence stared at him for a long time, almost expecting him to evaporate at the next gust of wind. But he did not.

There he was, breathtakingly handsome, standing right in front of him, his hands stuck in his pockets, visibly waiting for the younger one to react. Credence cleared his throat, to avoid his voice sounding too strange, before asking:

"What are you... what are you doing here? "

"Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb, I can come back later if... "

"No! No, don't go! Please! " he hastened to say.

He sounded terribly desperate, but he didn't care as long as Percival didn't go away. Percy had a little smirk on his face, as if Credence's reaction was exactly what he had hoped for. The younger one blushed slightly, moving a little closer before explaining, his voice trembling, letting the words pass his lips without really thinking about what he was saying:

"It's just that I was surprised. Weren't you supposed to be in England with Seraphina? Not that I mind... It's quite the opposite. I'm sorry, it's just that I've spent way too many evenings drinking vodka and seeing you everywhere... Oh shit... I should stop speaking... I'll stop talking now. "

He was red with shame now. _Learn to speak, damn it!_ he reprimanded himself. How could anyone look so ridiculous? Especially in front of the man of his life! He almost expected Percival to tell him that he'd gotten the wrong address before he turned his heels and ran away from that strange moment.

But no, Percy just approached, his right hand leaving his coat pocket to gently replace a lock of Credence's hair behind his ear. The younger one had to bite the inside of his cheek to avoid closing his eyes and letting out an appreciative sound (which would have dangerously sounded like a moan) at this brief, simple contact. Graves hesitated for a few moments, his eyes linked to Credence's, before saying:

"I just... I realized that I had left without saying goodbye…"

The youngest frowned. It wasn't really what he expected to hear... (Well, okay, in his mind he imagined Percy taking him in his arms before declaring : " _I'm irremediably in love with you, let's live happily together until the end of time_ ", all this with violins playing in the background).

"So you've come back to say goodbye? " he asked uncertainly.

Percival came closer, so close that Credence could feel the warmth of his body through his coat. He put his hands on his cheeks, and this time the younger one let himself go against the contact he had so longed for. It was almost intoxicating, and no doubt it was because of the lack of food, but the smell and Grave's breath against his skin made his head spin.

"No, not exactly..." Percy murmured. "Would you mind if I kissed you goodbye? "

"Kiss me? "

"Yes…"

"No, I wouldn't mind... "

Percival leaned a little more towards him, but as he was about to touch his lips, Credence moved away slightly. He needed to be sure, he needed to know that Percy wouldn't disappear afterwards, because Credence was really not sure if he could survive that kiss if it was to watch Graves leave again.

"So... No more London? " he asked.

"No. " he smiled. "I'm staying in New York. "

"No more Seraphina? No more engagement, no more wedding? "

 _Please... please, I want to be the one you choose, not the other one, not the one you hide... Don't break my heart, Percy..._ he thought. Percival closed his eyes, resting his forehead against his own, whispering a sweet:

"No, no more Seraphina. Just you... "

Credence closed his eyes and felt a tear roll down his cheek. It was far too wonderful to be true... It was a dream, wasn't it? Well if it was, he didn't want to wake up! He never wanted to wake up!

"You promise?" he insisted, his voice full of emotion.

"I swear it. "

He didn't need anything else, since nothing else mattered. In a gesture a little abrupt and awkward, he passed his arms around Percival's neck before putting his lips against his. He had the impression that his whole life had converged on that moment, that all his choices had been made so that he would find himself there, tonight, under the snow, kissing Percival Graves.

It was electric, passionate, full of life, and Credence knew that he had never felt what he felt against Graves's lips. Tears were coming out of his closed eyes and he couldn't hold them back. It was so strong, so full of love and so full of promise. Percy kissed him back with even more ardor, an arm clenched around his waist, his free hand tucking into his hair. He felt like he was flying away, his feet slowly coming off the ground. Everything was perfect.

The sound of a horn suddenly brought them back to reality, putting an end to the kiss. They were both out of breath, their eyes shining, their lips pink and swollen. Graves seemed confused, slightly shaken by his feelings and the jolt that the noise had caused. In the car across the street, Tina honked the horn again. Oh my God, he had completely forgotten about them! He put a quick kiss on Percy's lips and then said in a sorry pout:

"Just give me two minutes, okay? "

"Okay!" Percival replied, still breathless from the kiss, releasing, visibly reluctantly, the waist of the youngest.

After a small smile, he crossed the road to approach the car. Tina rolled down her window, she looked upset.

"I think... I think I'm going to stay..." Credence confessed.

"Alone? With him? " Tina asked, raising an eyebrow.

Her tone was dry, as if what he was saying was completely unthinkable.

"Uh... Yes? " he replied in a small voice.

"No! There's no way I'm leaving you here alone, Credence Jones! " she cried. "Not after what Gellert did to you! Not after what he did to you! Damn it, Cree, five days ago he announced his engagement to Seraphina! "

"I know, but... "

"Credence, it's too dangerous! " she interrupted. "What if he lies to you, if he manipulates you, if he breaks your heart? We'll be on the other side of the country! "

"There's no fucking chance we'll leave you here! " Nagini added from the back of the car. "No fucking way! "

"Damn it, don't any of you ever listen to what Credence says?" Queenie raved. "He wants to be left alone with Percival, so we leave him alone with Percival, for God's sake! "

Of course Queenie understood him, she must have felt what he felt. And besides, her story with Jacob had been so complicated at the beginning, that she was probably the only one in his group of friends who could understand Credence's situation. He gave her a grateful smile and she responded with a discreet wink. Tina bit her lower lip, frowning, obviously against the idea.

"But what if... " she tried.

" " _What if_ " nothing, Tina! " her sister said. "He's a grown man and you're not his mother! If he ever has a problem, Newt and Jacob are in town! He's the love of his life, we're not going to stop him from staying just because we're afraid it's going to go wrong! "

"Didn't you see the state he was in, earlier? Starving, his eyes swollen from crying too much, dragging himself into his apartment like a soul in pain! "

Ouch... He had just felt a small blow in his self-esteem. Even though he knew that Tina was right.

"I'm right here, Tina... " he reminded her.

"I'm sorry Cree, but it's the truth! " she replied.

Yes, well, it was hard to say otherwise. Even him thought he was pathetic, so... He leaned over to the car door and said:

"I'm in love, Tina! I'm so, so deeply in love with him. "

He knew he didn't need her approval, but it was important to him that she try to understand, that she try to put herself in his place. She looked at him for a long time, weighing the pros and cons. Then, after a long, noisy sigh, she pinched the bone of her nose, closing her eyes, before asking :

"Nag, give him his bag. "

Nagini also sighed, grabbing his travel bag, opening her door and handing it to Credence. He straightened up to grab it before looking again at Tina's upset face.

"I'm sorry... " he apologized.

"Don't be sorry, honey!" Queenie smiled at him. "Have a good time! "

He nodded, taking a step back. He was about to say goodbye to them before going back to Percival when Tina's trembling voice was heard again:

"Can I... can I just ask you to send me a message in the morning? Not to babysit you, just to make sure that everything is okay... that you're okay. "

How could he refuse her such a thing? A smile took place on his face and he leaned through the car window again to put a loud kiss on the young woman's cheek.

"I'll write to you as soon as I wake up. " He promised, "I love you Tina. And I love you too!" he added to Queenie and Nag's attention.

"We love you, honey. "

"Yeah, we fucking do, even when you look like shit. " Nagini laughed gently.

And after a wave of the hand, Credence trotted away with his bag to Percy. He felt light, happy, rid of all his fears (at least partly). But the older one seemed nervous, glaring around him as if he was afraid of someone coming around the corner. Or maybe he was just terrified that Credence had changed his mind. Which had no fucking chance of happening!

"Shall we go in?" suggested the younger one.

"Yes, of course. " Percy replied.

Credence smiled at him before opening the door of the building. Percival followed him, staying right behind him. As they climbed the stairs, young Jones felt Grave's fingers clinging lightly to his coat, as if he was afraid he would fly away, and that made him smile. It was touching, a little childish, and it revealed Percy's fragility and delicacy.

When they arrived in his apartment, Credence thanked his friends for the little cleaning they had done. He would have been red with shame to welcome Percival here amidst empty vodka bottles and half-eaten bowls of instant noodles.

And this thought suddenly made him aware of the clothes he was wearing under his big coat. His travel clothes were ridiculously ugly. Damn it, he had to change! You don't spend your first evening with the man of your dreams dressed like a bogeyman! What if they were " _intimate_ " tonight (oh God, he spoke like an old man)? He had no idea what underwear he was wearing! Maybe Nag had chosen a panty with a hole in it! The anguish tied up in his stomach. He turned to Percy, smiling uncomfortably at him, and said:

"Would you just give me a minute? "

Graves barely had time to nod, a little surprised, before Credence almost ran off to his room. Oh boy, he was about to have an anxiety attack! He had to be perfect, otherwise Percy would just go back to England _! Okay, Credence, breathe. It's not like the incredibly handsome and generous man you've been in love with for months is standing in the middle of your living room._ Oh God, that wasn't reassuring at all! Of course that's exactly what was happening!

With trembling hands, he opened his wardrobe, rummaging for a moment before setting his heart on a navy blue shirt and black pants. He put them on his bed, before turning to his underwear drawer. Did he have to put on lingerie? No, that would be much too awkward, wouldn't it? Yes, that would be weird, it was better to have something simple. He started to undress and just as he had only his T-shirt and boxers to take off, the front door slammed shut.

Credence straightened up suddenly, feeling all the muscles in his body tense with apprehension as his stomach contracted violently. His heart quickened, and without any consideration for his appearance, he opened his bedroom door to look into the living room. Nobody... Okay, now he was really panicking.

"Percy? " he called, walking around the apartment.

But no answer. Percival was nowhere to be found, and through the window he saw the silhouette of the young Graves walking up the street fast, away from his building. What had he done? What had he done to make him run away? Why had Percy changed his mind?

Credence gripped his hair, his breathing more and more difficult, when suddenly his eyes fell on his coffee table, on his diary ... open. Oh my God, he had left his diary open on the date of April, where he had written down literally: " _Percival Graves is unpleasant, stupid and contemptuous. He thinks he's above everyone else and he's an asshole! No wonder his fiancée left him! I hate him!_ "and Graves had read it. 

"Fuck! " He shouted, furious against himself.

Without thinking further, he put on his Dr. Martens, grabbed his keys, before running off in pursuit of Percival. He didn't give a damn about the cold, and even less about the fact that he had a T-shirt barely long enough to hide his buttocks and that he had no pants. Well, anyway, he had spent a whole summer running half-naked after Percy, so it wasn't like it was new! Even though 18 years had passed since then...

Outside, the cold was biting his skin, and the icy air was burning his throat as he ran as fast as he could. The few people he met looked at him with stunned eyes, shocked by his attire. Well, fuck them! He was busy chasing the love of his life, damn it!

And besides, the police could arrest him for indecent exposure later, as long as he managed to catch Percival. At the end of his street, Credence arrived at a crossroads, and in the middle of the crowd there, largely because of the stores, he was unable to find Grave's silhouette. He tiptoed around, completely out of breath and panicked. Tears burned his eyes.

No, he hadn't lost him... Not again! He was going to find him, explain everything to him! _Credence, you are so stupid! You're the worst person in the world!_ repeated his inner voice to him.

He was desperate, he felt helpless, his arms wrapped around his own body in the cold of what should have been the most beautiful evening of his life. He should have listened to Tina, it was obvious that he was going to make a mistake and that he was going to be left alone on his couch with only his eyes to cry... Hope slowly faded away, and he felt like screaming in the middle of the street.

After a long, long time, he turned around, ready to go back to bury himself for good in his flat, and his eyes fell on Percival coming out of the bookstore at the corner of the street. A plaintive sound passed Credence lips as Percy stared at him, visibly stunned. He could at least start breathing again.

"I'm... I'm so sorry..." Credence wept. "I wasn't thinking about what I was writing, I didn't mean it. I mean, I meant it, but it was long before I really knew you. I was angry at you, angry at the way you were behaving with me, probably because I already liked you so much and it was even harder to bear. For God's sake, it's just a stupid diary! We can burn it if you want, or tear it up into tiny little pieces. And everybody knows that diaries are just for letting off steam... "

Graves kept silent, standing still a few steps from the entrance of the store. Everyone around them looked at them as if they came from another planet. Credence approached Percy, his glance begging with tears.

"Please stay... " he sobbed. "I won't let you go, not this time. The diary means nothing to me, but you mean everything. You are everything. And I know that I realized it too late and that you would have every reason in the world to think I'm not worth it, but...You have no idea how much I missed you, how much I dreamed about you ringing my doorbell like you did tonight. Just give me a chance, please... please... "

In a gesture so tender that it seemed almost unreal, Percival drew Credence against him. He placed a series of butterfly kisses on his forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks, before moving back to smile at him. Then he rummaged inside his coat and pulled out a brand new diary.

"I just wanted to buy you a new diary. " he said. "To make a fresh start. Sorry for frightening you, I thought I'd come back soon enough. "

Credence froze, while his brain processed the information. He had bought him a diary so he could write their new beginning, their story, the one that started tonight. Percival opened his coat so he could bring the younger one a little closer to him, closing the cloth around his cold body. He looked at Credence as if he were a pure wonder, as if he had never seen anything as beautiful as a disheveled, half-naked fool chasing after him in the middle of winter.

"So you're not leaving? " the young Jones asked. "You're not leaving me? "

Percival laughed with amusement before teasing him and replied:

"Not if I can stay and enjoy those lovely legs you're showing off tonight. "

Credence passed his arms around his neck, burying his face against him, holding him tight. Percival wasn't leaving, he was going to stay. The tears he shed in that embrace were tears of joy, tears of liberation. He stood on tiptoe, closing his eyes, placing his cheek against Percy's so that he could whisper in his ear:

"I am in love with you. "

"You are ? "

"Yes, desperately. " He confessed.

Percival's grip around his waist tightened more as he kissed his neck, jaw, and cheek before capturing his lips in a quick peck. He didn't care about the looks on them or what people were thinking. Tonight he was in the arms of the most perfect man in the Universe.

"It's perfect because : Me too. " Percival replied against his lips.

Then he captured his mouth again. The kiss was intense, so powerful and so full of love that Credence felt a gentle warmth rise in his belly as the butterflies in his abdomen flew in all directions. Graves hugged him tight, almost breathtaking, and the younger one couldn't help but run his hands through his hair. He felt as if he was turning into glowing embers and he was in danger of spontaneous combustion if Percival didn't stop this magical thing he was doing with his tongue.

They parted when they ran out of air. And God, Percy was incredibly sexy! It was almost inhuman to be so damn hot! Credence was completely out of breath, his heart pounding in a disordered rush. He felt like he was on a cloud. Graves put his forehead against his own.

"Good boys don't kiss like that. " Credence joked.

"Oh yes they do, and you'll soon find out that they do much more than that. "

And in a quick gesture, Percival put one arm behind his back and the other under his knees so he could carry him like a bride, as if he weighed nothing. Credence let a crystalline laugh pass through his lips, keeping his arms around Percy's neck as he carried him back to his apartment. He buried his face in his collar, breathing with relief the smell of Graves. He was going to stay. Better than that : he had come back for him. He had left everything for him. That was love, true, powerful, unstoppable love.

Once in the apartment, the new diary was quickly left on the coffee table next to its companion. They had vaguely tried to stay far enough away from each other to talk, but after just a few words, Credence had literally thrown himself on Percy, his arms around his neck, his legs firmly hung around his waist. Percival had carried him to the bedroom, abandoning his coat and shoes on the way.

Getting naked under Percival's hands was quick for Credence, but the reverse took much longer. Why in God's name was he wearing so many layers? He had all the misery in the world removing Percy's shirt, his hands trembling with excitement, Graves kissing his lips, marking his neck, his shoulder, caressing his hips. Credence's head was spinning, he was unable to think clearly, his mind fogged by Percy's touch, his smell, his voice that sometimes let out a moan.

They were both desperate in that embrace, in that warmth, in that passion. Credence felt as if he had waited for this man for an eternity and that his life only made sense now that he was holding him so tightly. Percival shed a few tears, which Credence kissed with his lips when they found themselves completely naked in the sheets. Graves was delicate in the slightest of his gestures, to the point of making the younger one go insane, as if he was afraid of hurting or breaking him. Credence was more feverish, clinging to him with all his strength, his nails digging into the skin of his back, kissing his lips with burning fervor.

It would never again belong to anyone but Percival. No more other looks, other hands, other lips, other skin. Just him, **_forever._** Because tonight, under the light of the moon, he was sure he had found his soul mate. He felt it in every beat of his heart, every atom of his being, every part of his mind. He belonged to Graves. He was his. And nothing else mattered but the voice of Percival whispering his name like a litany, like a prayer. A prayer that begged him to stay, to love him, to abandon himself to him.

Nothing existed beyond the warmth of his body, the beating of his heart against his own, his moans, his eyes shining with adoration and love, his strong arms wrapped around him, his passionate movements. And when the moment of ecstasy came, when the wave rose up along Credence's body to lift his heart and he almost desperately cried out the name of the man of his life, he could not help thinking that, despite the other times he had been naked against someone, despite the pleasure he had already felt, despite the intimate experiences he had had, this embrace was different. He had the deep conviction that he had made love, really **_made love_** in the literal sense of the words, for the very first time. And it was overwhelming. It was amazing. It was perfect. It was Percival. And in the music of the silence of this room rocked by their breaths, Credence was alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And yes, I use this GIF again because I find it just incredible (that smile...). I literally have no strength left ^^ I'll try to post the last chapter this weekend, but it will depend on my work. ^^ Thanks for reading, feel free to comment <3


	9. Happy Ever After and Eternal Love

When Credence opened his eyes the next morning, it took him a while to remember what had happened the day before. He wasn't sure what belonged to the dream and what belonged to reality. A smile appeared on his blushing face as the memories returned, settling in his mind like the tender, passionate caresses that marked his skin. The night before had been so wonderful...But this moment of delicacy was short-lived when he noticed that the bed was empty next to him. Credence stood up, listening carefully to the noises around him, hoping to hear at least some footsteps in the next room. But there was nothing but his own breathing, getting faster and faster, the unbearable sizzle of his old fridge and the sounds coming from the street.

"Percival? " he called.

No answer. He got up from bed, putting on a T-shirt and underwear before leaving the room. The rest of the apartment was plunged into a heavy and slightly frightening silence. Okay, completely _frightening_! Nothing in the kitchen, nobody in the bathroom either. And not the slightest trace of Percival in his apartment, it was as if he had never been here, as if Credence had imagined everything.

He was frozen in the middle of his living room, pulling his hair, trying to stay calm when the front door opened. Humming, Percival entered the apartment, loaded with bags from the grocery store. When his eyes landed on Credence, a desolate, panicked expression took place on his face. He dropped the groceries on the floor, completely ignoring the jar of jam that rolled on the carpet, before approaching the youngest in two steps, taking him in his arms. It was then that Credence realized he was crying. Damn it, that's all he'd been doing for a week! At that rate, he was going to be able to fill a swimming pool!

Percy put kisses in his hair, his wet cheeks, his forehead, his chin, his lips, his neck, embracing him tightly.

"I'm sorry... " he apologized. "There was nothing in your fridge and I wanted to make you breakfast... Oh my God, I'm so sorry. Didn't you see my note on your bedside table? "

No, he didn't see it. Oh God, why didn't he look around before he freaked out like an idiot! Credence shook his head before coming to snuggle completely against Percival. That was where he wanted to be for the rest of his life: in his arms. His smell was reassuring, comforting, intoxicating. Credence wrapped his arms around Percy's waist, holding him very close, burying his face in his coat, saying against the cloth :

"Don't leave me alone anymore... "

"I have no intention of doing so. " he replied with a smile.

They stayed like that for a few minutes before Credence agreed to release Viviane's son. Percy put a tender kiss on his lips before retrieving the grocery bags and heading into the kitchen. The younger one watched him for a long time, leaning against the door frame to admire him with a blissful air. Graves took off his coat, put it on one of the chairs and then started cooking, whistling a music that Credence had trouble recognizing. He reluctantly walked away from the kitchen and returned to the bedroom. Next to Percival's note (which said, " _I'll be back soon, I've gone to buy some food, I promise I won't forget the apples_ "), Credence found his phone. And as promised, he sent a message to Tina.

" ** _Everything is fine, everything is perfect. I've never been so happy and in love in my life. I hope everything is all right for you, I love you. Kisses_**."

He felt light, free of an unbearable weight on his shoulders. He felt like he could finally breathe, that his heart could beat freely. After a sigh of relief, he put on pants and a sweater to be more comfortable (and especially not to get sick, it was already a miracle that he was healthy after his half-naked escapade last night). His cell phone vibrated on the bed and he watched Tina's response:

" ** _I'm happy for you Cree, I really am. I'm sorry I got a little upset yesterday, but you are my best friend and I love you with all my heart. It's going to be like that for the rest of your life. Tell Graves I'll break his neck if he breaks your heart. Kisses from the three of us_** "

He never doubted for a moment that Tina would take it upon herself to find Percy on the other side of the planet if he ever harmed Credence. And he was pretty sure that if she couldn't find him, Nagini would swim across the ocean to punch him. But deep down he knew that Percival would never break his heart. He had really good friends, and he owed them a lot. ( Mostly his mental health...)

In the living room, music resounded. Putting his phone on the bedside table, Credence left the room. Percival had plugged his cell phone into his speaker and had launched "Only You" by Yazoo. A smile lit up his face as he walked into the room. Graves turned to him, visibly as happy and relaxed as he was. He offered him a hand to invite him to dance in an overly theatrical gesture and Credence accepted, letting a laugh pass his lips. Percival pulled him up against him, one hand on his lower back, the other holding the youngest's delicate fingers. He led him into a romantic dance, singing the words of the song in Credence's ear with his deep voice.

_Came back only yesterday_

_I'm moving further away_

_Want you near me_

_All I needed was the love you gave_

_All I needed for another day_

_And all I ever knew_

_Only you_

Credence closed his eyes, savoring the incredible feeling of knowing he was loved, of knowing he was wanted. Then Percival swirled him around, playing the seducer, making incongruous grimaces, and attempting improbable figures to make the youngest laugh. Percy was so handsome when he smiled, it was beyond belief. And it was fun to see that he had the same musical tastes as he did. (His downstairs neighbor was definitely going to move now...) After another burst of laughter, Credence put his arms around the lawyer's neck, drawing him in a kiss that showed his happiness and feelings. They parted towards the end of the music when they ran out of air.

Graves had a wonderful smile on his lips, and Credence felt like he was falling in love with him even more. He wondered how much it was possible to give up your heart completely to someone. (your heart, your soul, your mind, your body, your future, each of your breaths, each of your smiles, to lose yourself entirely to exist only for him in fact.)

"You look happy. " the younger one said.

"I don't look happy, I AM happy! " Percival replied. "And it's your fault, Mr. Jones. You will have to face the consequences. "

"With great pleasure!" he smiled.

After another kiss, Percival intertwined their fingers and led Credence into the kitchen. He pulled out one of the chairs to invite him to sit down before serving him wholemeal toast with peanut butter, apple and honey. He had arranged everything on a small plate worthy of the greatest restaurants, especially with the small blueberries on top. He served them two glasses of orange juice under the tender gaze of Credence. Graves kissed his cheek before sitting down in front of him.

"So we need to have an important conversation. " he said suddenly in a serious voice.

Credence's stomach tightened violently and he swallowed his bite with difficulty. His heartbeat quickened as he looked up at Percy. An important conversation?

" About what? " he asked in a small voice.

Percival must have noticed his distress as he took one of his hands between his own and brought it to his lips to gently kiss his knuckles. He smiled tenderly at Credence to reassure him before answering:

"About us. "

"What are you trying to say? "

Graves straightened up to give himself a falsely serious look, which poorly hid his smirk, before declaring in a solemn voice :

"I have a list of questions to ask you. "

"A list of questions?" Credence wondered, raising an eyebrow.

Percival took a piece of bread which he chewed quickly, one of his hands still holding the fingers of the younger one, as if he was afraid he would run away. It was cute to see that he was trying to keep his calm and confident attitude while squeezing Credence's hand almost too tightly, conveying without a word that he was as panicked as he was at the thought of losing him.

"If I want to take care of you in the coming months, I need these answers. "Graves explained.

It was hard to say no to him. Especially knowing that Credence was planning to stay with him much longer than just a few months. Maybe a few years? Or a few lives? Or a few eternities? Yes, it was more like that. He planned to stay with Graves in all the alternate realities of their existence until the end of time. The younger one drew their interlaced fingers to his mouth, kissing the top of Percival's hand with the tip of his lips, before answering:

"Okay fine, let's play a game: you ask me a question, I answer, then I ask you a question and you answer, does that seem fair to you? "

"That sounds great to me. " He smiled.

Oh my God, that smile! It had to be an illegal weapon! He was going to melt on the spot. How did he get to be so hot? And how could Credence have gone so long without noticing how sexy he was? _Concentration Credence, concentration!_ After a little throat clearing in an attempt to hide his red cheeks, the youngest boy takes a sip of orange juice and said :

"Okay, you start. "

Percival approached his chair to be next to him, leaning on the table, his chin resting on his hand, his eyes glued to the face of young Jones.

"What is your favorite color? "

That's an easy question.

"Blue. When is your birthday? "

"June 15th. What's your favorite song? "

Credence thought about it for a moment. It was a very good question, he didn't really know to answer. Of course, he often listened to depressing music about love and disappointment, but he wasn't sure if he really had a favorite song. He shrugged before saying : 

"I don't really have one, it depends on the moment. Currently it is "Heather" by Conan Gray. What are your hobbies ? "

"Reading and chess. "

"It is super annoying ! " he laughed gently.

"Not when it allows me to send you poems. "

Credence blushed more, thinking back to the Poe quote and irises. Percival was right, there was nothing boring about it when it meant being able to turn the youngest's heart upside down with just a few sentences. Oh God, he was so irretrievably in love with that man.

"What's your favorite food?" Percy continued. "Apples don't count. "

Knowing what food he liked was difficult enough since he wasn't particularly interested in eating in general. He enjoyed Japanese food, but he was unable to find his favorite dish.

"I... I don't really know actually... " he confessed.

Graves seemed surprised by this answer.

"Don't you have a favorite meal? "

"No, I don't think so... "

"Okay, am I allowed to cook what I want from now on? "

And at the mere thought of seeing Percival daily in his kitchen preparing small dishes for him, Credence felt his heart fly away. He, who had never been a big food lover, would most certainly discover a passion for Graves' cooking. And certainly for a fantasy of Percy naked under an apron... He gave him a tender smile when he replied:

"Permission granted. When did you realize you liked me? "

Percy was more than confused by the question. He frowned, putting his eyes on his plate, seemingly thinking about the question, biting his lower lip. There was a silence in the kitchen, and the youngest didn't dare to make the slightest gesture, afraid to rush him. Maybe he shouldn't have asked this, but he really wanted to know his answer. Finally, Graves' shy voice was heard:

"Promise you won't laugh…"

Credence reached under his chin with his index finger and raised Percy's worried face towards him. He waited until he looked up at him before saying in a reassuring tone:

"Why would I laugh? "

"Because that's a pretty pathetic answer..." Graves admitted with a sad smile.

"I'll be the judge of that. I'm listening to you. "

Percival took a deep breath, as if he needed courage, lowering his eyes again, blushing slightly when he said:

"I liked you from the moment we met at the buffet at your parents' house. "

The youngest blinked several times. Did he? Percival had found him interesting from that day on? He thought he found him pathetic... He moved back a little, settling more comfortably in his chair, waiting for Graves to continue.

"When I turned around and saw you, I felt my heart miss a beat, my stomach was tight, and I hated it right away. I mean, you were wearing that awful red jacket and shirt, and they would have been horrible on anyone, but it just made you look original. I found you incredibly beautiful, and you looked nice, fragile, smart, adorable, and it freaked me out. You have to know that after Gellert, I promised myself that I would never let myself go to such strong and sudden feelings again. And that I would never have a relationship with a man again. And then you showed up, with your shy smile, your brown curls, your pink lips, your porcelain skin and your angelic look. And it frightened me... "

Percival looked up at him, he seemed both relieved and terrified to have confessed this. And in front of his lost look, Credence approached to caress his cheek. Percy leaned against this contact, closing his eyes as if he was desperately craving this affection. 

"But you... you were... " the youngest stuttered.

"Horrible?" Graves proposed, opening his eyes shining with emotion. "Yes, I know. And I don't really have an excuse. I was just convinced when I saw you that day that you were going to end up stealing my heart and breaking it. And that's what you did, several times. "

He said this with a smile, but it sounded awfully painful and Credence felt his heart squeeze. Yes, Percy had been clumsy, but he had been quite mean to him on his part. And he had hurt him a lot, and yet Graves had forgiven him. And he had given up his resolution not to fall in love at first sight, he had given up his decision not to get into a relationship with a man. _I don't deserve him..._ Credence thought.

"I am sorry. " he murmured, feeling tears forming in the corner of his eyes.

Graves seemed to panic at his condition and he hurried to kneel down in front of him, framing his face, caressing his cheeks before telling him:

"No! No, you don't have to apologize! Gellert manipulated you, that's what he does best! I know something about it. And I've been the worst asshole too... "

No, that was not true. He had not been especially nice or subtle, but he had not been an asshole, at least not to the extent that would have justified Credence's behavior towards him. And even less knowing what Grindelwald had done to both of them.

"You were clumsy, but you were not an asshole. " He reassured him.

Percival shook his head, denying Credence's assertion, letting his hands fall back along his body. He had a sad little laugh that broke the youngest's heart. He seemed so prostrate on himself, as if he was waiting to be forgiven, as if he needed to beg Credence to accept him.

"Yes, I was. I'm an asshole, that's a fact. I've been cruel to you, and I've allowed myself comments that I would never have made to anyone else. Sometimes I feel like I've become just like him... "

Credence was not certain of many things, but he was convinced down to the smallest atom in his body that Percival was wrong about this. He was so fragile, he had suffered so much and lacked so much self-confidence that he had come to think that he had become like Gellert. And God, he was so much better than him! The mere fact that he doubted it only proved it further. And Credence was so angry with himself for telling him the opposite on the night of his birthday.

He framed his face with his hands, forcing him to look at him, and tears rolled down Percival's cheeks. The younger one hated Gellert with all his might, he hated knowing that Graves had belonged to him body and soul and that he had broken him, he hated the fact that he had made him afraid of his feelings, that he had rip his heart so violently that Percy was terrified of losing Credence... He hated him with all his being. And he was furious with himself too, furious that he did not protect him, that he had pushed him over a precipice, that he had hurt him so unjustly. The younger one kissed him deeply, trying to convey his love in this gesture. Then he moved back, linking his gaze to his before saying in a sure tone:

"Percy, you are not at all like him! "

Percival looked away again, trying to hide as best he could the sobs that were coming out of his voice when he spoke:

"Yes, I am! I am selfish, I know how to be cruel when I am hurt, and I have harmed you, and I am clumsy, and I ... "

"Percy, you are not him! " insisted Credence, in a voice that allowed no contradiction.

Graves closed his eyes, obviously not believing him, lost in a suffering that he seemed to have left aside in the only purpose of protecting Credence. He forgot that he also needed to rebuild himself, that he too had been wounded and broken and that he could rely on young Jones as he had been relying on him. Credence had to make him understand, he absolutely had to make him hear the truth.

“Percival, look at me…”

He waited for Percy to open his shining eyes again and told him:

"You are not him, do you hear me? You don't always do things right, but I'm the same. You're a jerk sometimes, I know that, I'm aware of it, but I love you and I understand you. I'm not a gift either, I'm a touchy pain in the ass who would like his life to look like something full of stars and butterflies and smiles. But even with all this, even with my shitty idealism and your moronic character, with your mood swings and my almost suffocating need for affection, I'm convinced that we can build something together. We might fall down at times, several times even, but at least we'll really love each other. I will hold you against me and offer you all that I can and all that I know best. Ups and downs, everyone has them. The most important thing is to know that even if we hate each other at times, even if we fight, even if we leave by slamming the door, we will come back to each other and that won't stop us from loving each other to death. "

Percival swallows with difficulty, staring at Credence with his big dark eyes. The tears stopped flowing and his gaze changed from sadness to a kind of adoration, as if the young Jones was made of pure crystal.

"What?" Credence asked, uncertain.

"So it was you I've been waiting for all my life? " he asked, his voice trembling.

Credence bent down to kiss him tenderly, smiling against his lips. Then he moved aside to place his forehead against his.

"I hope so. " he murmured.

"I want to make love to you. "

The younger one choked on his own saliva. He felt his cheeks burn at once and his heart jumping all over the place. He really wasn't expecting this sentence, yet his body reacted immediately, making him even more flushed. He straightened up, releasing Percy's face, clearing his throat to give himself some self-control before saying in an unconvincing voice:

"My God, warn before you say things like that! "

He took his orange juice, drinking it from the tip of his lips, awkwardly trying to hide the effect of Percival's sentence, while being fully aware that he was kneeling in front of him. Percy stood up, resting his hands on each armrests of Credence's chair, overhanging him with his whole body, taking away all possible escape options. And the warmth of the young man's lower abdomen rose up to his heart and lips. He swallowed with difficulty, raising his irises to those of Graves. _Oh my God, way too much sex appeal in such a small space._

"I want to make love to you now. " he whispered, his voice making Credence shudder.

And the next moment, young Jones literally threw himself at him, kissing him ferociously, moaning shamelessly against his lips. Percival put his hands under him so that he could lift him up before pushing what was on the worktop so that he could put him on it. Graves kissed him back with the same ardor and love, biting his lower lip at times in a possessive gesture.

Credence had his hands in his hair, his legs around his waist, clutching him tightly. Percy pressed himself a little closer to him as his mouth grew more eager, going down his neck, pulling his sweater and shirt to kiss his shoulder before coming back towards his mouth. Credence allowed himself to get caught up in the moment, hugging him closer, savoring the muffled groan Graves let out as he tucked his hands behind his back under his shirt.

Percival stepped aside to remove his top, kissing the pale skin that offered itself to him with as much ardor as the day before. Credence had the impression of burning, it was both too much and yet not enough. He wanted more, he needed more. And Graves seemed to understand this, as moments later he carried him to the bedroom and then gently laid him down on the mattress. And once again, Credence gave himself up to the embrace, giving back as best he could everything Percy gave him, returning what he made him feel and offer. He could never tire of his skin, the warmth of his hands, the delicacy of his lips, the power of his smell. His body seemed to respond automatically to all of Percy's gestures, as if they had been destined to become one. And at this realization, a tear rolled down Credence's cheek.

He loved him, he loved him so much. And he was going to devote himself, body and soul, to making him understand it. No one would ever hurt him again, no one would ever break his heart. Credence was going to protect him. He might not have been the knight of the story, but that wouldn't stop him from fighting for the man of his life. And the year that would begin tonight was going to be the most wonderful year of his entire existence.

* * *

Sitting in the passenger seat of Percival's car, Credence was twisting his fingers in a nervous tic. He had spent a considerable amount of time in the bathroom in the morning in order to present himself in the best possible way to his in-laws (well, not quite yet, he had made a mental note to wait at least a year before proposing to Percival, he didn't want to scare him away). He had asked Percy at least a dozen times if he found him presentable, and each time he had replied, "Credence, you are gorgeous. "

That was easy for him to say! He was just perfect all the time! Every time they met at Credence or Percy's, the older one was ALWAYS impeccably handsome. It was almost unfair! And quite frankly, it drove Credence to the brink of insanity, which certainly justified the fact that they often started their evenings making love wildly. The young Jones was forced to admit that for the last three months he had no self-control when he found himself alone in front of Percival. And who in God's name could have foreseen that one person could awaken such a libido in him!

Tina had even said that everyone could see it on his face: " _You have that kind of post-coital glow all the time_ " (to which Nag had of course added " _Nothing better than a good fuck, and the apple stalker looks really gifted for it_ ").

He was lost in his thoughts when Graves grabbed his hand so that he could place a tender kiss on his palm. The touch almost startled him as he turned to his boyfriend. Percival had his eyes focused on the road ahead of him when he said:

"You don't need to be stressed, everything will be fine. "

Easy to say! Henrietta and Charles had welcomed Percival as the messiah! His mother had spent hours discussing cooking with him before Mr. Jones took over with poetry and literature in general. 

"I'm terrified! " Credence exclaimed. "The last time I saw your parents was three months ago, I screamed in the middle of their living room that I didn't want you to leave and get married!"

"And my mother is very happy about that. " Percy assured him.

Well, it wasn't like he didn't know Viviane and William, he'd known them since he was a child, but he couldn't calm down. What if they thought he was stupid? What if they decided he wasn't good enough for their son? Or worse : what if they tried to convince Percy to go back to Seraphina?! Oh no, he would die, it was obvious. A new kiss was put on his hand.

"Everything will be all right. " Percival smiled.

"That doesn't stop my anxiety. " Credence sighed, who was desperately trying to calm down.

"Credence, I love you, I'm in love with you, everything will be all right. "

Credence's heart missed a beat. He turned suddenly towards Percival, so quickly that he almost hurt his neck. _Oh my God, it's happening! It's happening!_ he thought.

"What did you just say? " he asked.

Percy frowned, quickly taking his eyes off the road so he could look at Credence before he turned his attention back in front of him, repeating:

"That everything will to be all right. "

"No, before. " Credence insisted, leaning towards him, as if to make sure he heard what he was going to say clearly.

Graves seemed a bit confused. He stopped at the red light, and placed his dark and muddled irises on the younger one who was looking at him with his big eyes shining with adoration. Credence held his breath, his heart racing, his fingers firmly holding Percy's free hand.

"That I love you?" he repeated uncertainly. "Sweetheart, as if you didn't know it, I tell you all the time. "

_Oh my God, he said it! He had finally said it!_ Credence almost wanted to burst into tears and a huge smile lit up his face as he answered:

"No, you say "me too", it's not the same thing! It's the first time you've ever said _I love you_."

Percival's eyes widened disproportionately as he quickly blushed. He froze for a long time before a horn blew out his mind and he had to refocus on the road again. Then he frowned, seemingly searching in his memories for the first time he had said "I love you" to Credence. But obviously he couldn't because he asked in a trembling voice:

"Is it true? "

Credence nodded. Graves sighed loudly before exclaiming:

"My God, I'm a total loser! Why didn't you say anything before? Jesus, you're far too patient with me, I really don't deserve you, you should... "

"That's for me to decide, Percival Graves! " interrupted Credence.

The older one sighed again, visibly angry with himself. They finally arrived in the driveway of the Graves' house and Percival parked behind his father's car. He seemed really upset, his free hand firmly clenched on the steering wheel. He turned off the engine, but did not move an inch, his eyes lost in the distance. Credence removed his car belt so he could put a tender peck on his cheek. Percy turned towards him, immediately framing his face with his hands so that he could kiss him, first gently, then more and more feverishly. After a moment, they separated, both out of breath.

"Can I say it again?" Viviane's son whispered, his breath caressing Credence's skin.

_Control yourself, Credence! Keep your hands around his neck, you're right in front of his parents' house. Behave like a responsible adult, you're no longer a teenager under the influence of his hormones!_

"Yes please. " He murmured, trying to calm his irregular heartbeat.

Percy put his cheek against his own, confessing in a deep voice against his ear:

"I love you, Credence Jones"

Credence closed his eyes, savoring his words as pure wonders. Of course he knew how Percival felt about him, to say that he didn't would have been a lie, but it was so powerful, so overwhelming to hear him say those three words. Percy took advantage of the moment to drop a series of kisses on his temple, his cheek, his neck, robbing the youngest of a few wellness sighs. Then Graves backed away from him, removing his seatbelt so that he could more comfortably turn to Credence before asking in a serious tone:

"Now, do you want to move in with me? "

The younger one blinked several times, forcing himself to leave this foggy state of passion and desire to focus on what his boyfriend was telling him. His lost eyes and rosy cheeks made Percy smile,

"What?" Credence asked.

"Would you be willing to move out and come live with me? You know, share a kitchen, a living room and a bedroom. Bring your stuff to my apartment. A romantic flatshare. "

He asked him to move in with him... He asked him to live with him... Percival loved him, he needed to have him near him every day, every night. He wanted him. When he didn't answer, Graves spoke again:

"You can say no, I know it's a little fast. It's just that I feel happier when you're around and I have this slightly selfish desire to know that you're living with me, that I can find your silk shirts in my closet, that I can eat all the varieties of apples in the world when I get home, that it's your shampoo that I find in the shower, that your face is the first thing I see when I wake up. I want you for myself, and I want to be yours, and I expect nothing more than..."

"Yes, yes I want to live with you!" Credence interrupted him.

There was emotion and eagerness in his voice, as if he was afraid that Graves would withdraw his proposal if he didn't accept right away. A smirk took its place on the older man's lips.

"You can think about it, you know. " he said.

Credence raised his eyes to the sky, coming a little closer to him, his mouth only a few millimeters away from Percy's as he replied:

"Why would I need to think about a proposition like this one? "

An immense joy lit up the eldest face and he covered Credence's head with kisses, making him laugh several times.

"Okay, get ready. " he said afterwards.

"For what? "

"For me who will love you like no one has ever dared to love you, for me who will spend my time kissing you, spoiling you, cooking you food, and hopefully making you happy. Making you happy enough to hopefully make you decide to stay maybe for the rest of your life. "

He had already made up his mind that he was going to stay with Percy for the rest of his life. And for the one after. And for the one after… For all eternity, actually. It was always so moving to hear Graves make these kinds of declarations, as he sometimes found it so hard to express his feelings. It also showed that he wasn't afraid to be vulnerable in front of Credence, that he trusted him enough to tell him how he felt.

"Who are you and what have you done with my stalker from the grocery store? " he joked.

The panic took place on Graves' face and he moved slightly away from Credence, stammering:

"Sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you, I just thought... "

The end of his apology died against the lips of the younger one who kissed him passionately. Damn it, if it hadn't been for that meal which had been planned for two weeks, he would have already asked Percy to take him to his home (soon to be their home) so that he could tear off all his clothes. Percival kissed him back, trying to follow the mouth of the younger one as he pulled away so he could say:

"I love you. "

"Oh Credence, I love you, I love you so much. " He smiled, sounding slightly desperate.

He removed the distance between them, putting his arms around Credence's waist so that he could draw him completely against him. And after a few feverish kisses, the younger one found himself on his lap. Credence had to use a lot of self-control to regain a semblance of lucidity through his drumming heart, his growing desire, Percy's hands on his back under his shirt and his lips that were marking the base of his neck. 

"Percy. " he murmured, his head spinning in the heat of the car.

"Hmmm? "

"Percy, my love, we're in front of your parents' house, I'm not sure if this is the right time. "

Reason suddenly came back into Graves' mind and he seemed to realize where they were and what they were seamlessly doing. They were both completely out of breath and disheveled.

"Yes... Yes, you're right, sorry. But for God's sake, you have no idea what you're doing to me!"

Oh yes, Credence knew exactly what he wanted to talk about, since it was the same for him. After a quick kiss, he opened the door to get out of the car, putting his clothes back on properly, trying to redo his hairstyle. Percy imitated him, blushing at the thought of what they had just shared. If his parents had surprised them, it would have been a different story. Credence turned to his boyfriend to help him put his hair back in place, taking the opportunity to kiss each of his cheeks. They intertwined their fingers before moving towards the big house. They didn't even have to ring the bell as Viviane opened the door with a smile on her face. She immediately took Credence in her arms, hugging him tightly for several seconds, before doing the same with Percival.

She made no comment on their slight delay, simply telling them how happy she was to see the young couple. William joined them in the small dining room, politely greeting the younger one before taking his son in his arms. Viviane invited Credence to sit down before asking Percy to accompany her to help her with the meal. Before following his mother, the young Graves turned to his father who had just sat at the end of the table next to his boyfriend.

"Please don't scare him, father. " he said in a deep voice.

"Me? Why would I do that?" William asked.

"I know you..." he sighed.

He placed a quick kiss on Credence's forehead before walking away. No sooner had he disappeared into the kitchen that William leaned over to young Jones, his eyes narrowed, and asked him in a serious voice:

"What are your intentions towards my son? "

"I can hear you, Dad!" Percy shouted from the kitchen.

"It's just a question," Mr. Graves defended himself.

"Leave him alone William! " Viviane insisted.

Credence blushed, replacing one of his locks of hair behind his ear. He stood up to give himself some composure, holding the man's gaze in front of him to be able to say :

"I have no other intention than to try to make him happy and to love him for as long as he wants me. "

This was obviously a good answer as William moved backwards to be able to lean against his chair. He grabbed the bottle of white wine in front of him before serving a glass to Credence and filling his own. They had several sips in silence, but the youngest knew that the questions would not end there. He stood ready for the interrogation. And he was right, because Mr. Graves' voice was heard again:

"How old are you? "

"Twenty-six years old. "

"Have you ever had a serious relationship? "

"No, I have not. "

"Do you live alone? "

"Yes, I have my own apartment. But Percy just asked me to move in with him... "

"Do you earn a good living? Do you have a stable job? What are your activities? "

"Dad, for heaven's sake!" Percival raced out of the next room.

Credence had to bite the inside of his cheek so he wouldn't start laughing. He wasn't really stressed by William's behavior, in fact, he was much less nervous than he had imagined during the trip. He just wanted to make a good impression, and he was touched to see Percy standing up for him as if he was afraid that his father's questions would make him run away from him. Which didn't stand a chance, to be honest.

"What ? I'm trying to get to know him!" William replied.

"William, stop your interrogation!" Viviane intervened, displeased. "It's Credence! You've known him for almost 20 years! "

Oh my God, he really didn't want to hear once again about him half-naked who had run after Percy in the garden. Credence drank another sip of wine, trying a faint smile at the attention of Mr. Graves who grumbled something that vaguely looked like : " _Yes, but he wasn't in a relationship with Percival before_. " And he was not wrong.

"Dad, if you scare him, I swear to God I'll burn your stamp collection! "

William leaned over to his son's boyfriend and told him in confidence:

"He's saying this because he's really in love, right? "

Credence smiled at him completely this time before answering him in whispers as well:

"I dare to hope so, yes. I love him, Mr. Graves, with all my heart. "

A smile lit up the face of the old man who moved away from him to be able to consider him better. He seemed completely relaxed and reassured now.

"I believe you. " he said. "There's something sincere in your eyes that I've rarely had the opportunity to see. You are a good person, and to Percival, you have proven yourself to be an evidence. "

It was really a beautiful thing to hear, and Credence was deeply moved. William must have noticed this because he patted him gently on the hand before pouring him some more wine. After a few sips, the younger one ventured to ask:

"So... Did I pass the test? "

Mr. Graves laughed softly, as if the question of whether or not he would accept Credence in his son's life had never really arisen.

"Hands down, Credence Jones. " he answered.

And at the same time, Viviane and her son arrived in the room, bringing the dishes prepared for the meal. Mrs. Graves had prepared far too much things, and young Jones thought there was at least enough food for an entire regiment. But it all looked so tasty that he found some comfort in the quantity, which he had been used to during his childhood with Henrietta and Charles.

Percy sat down next to him, ran a hand through his hair and kissed his cheek.

"Are you all right? " he asked.

"Yes, I'm fine. I was discussing how I should give my blood test results to your father. " Credence joked.

William chocked himself with his sip of wine, giving Charles' son a surprised look. But the surprise soon gave way to amusement and he burst out laughing, while Credence showed a satisfied smile.

"I like you very much!" Mr. Graves said. " I love this one, you can keep him, Percy. "

"Thank you for your blessing. And I won't keep him unless he agrees. And what a way to talk about people, really!" Percival sighed, exasperated.

The young man felt a slight pressure on his leg. There was nothing inappropriate or insistent, it was like a tiny pinch above his knee. He glanced at Percy, who gave him a shy smile, his eyes shining, visibly anxious. Against his leg, Credence saw his hand, palm upwards, as if he was asking him something. And he understood at once that he was waiting for him to place his fingers between his own, to establish a reassuring contact, to show him that all was well through this tenderness that bound them together. Then he put his hand into his and tried to ignore the disordered beating of his heart, silently savoring the contact of his skin against Percival's, who seemed to relax. Perhaps he wasn't the only one who was afraid that things wouldn't go as planned. 

If others in the room noticed this exchange, none of them ventured to make any comment. Credence turned his attention to the conversation in progress, tightening his grip on Percy's fingers a little more, feeling his thumb caressing the top of his hand. Viviane talked at length about the new plants she had purchased for the garden and William shared a discussion with Credence about current events and his work as a journalist.

Towards the end of the meal, when Viviane and her husband walked away to get dessert, Percival leaned over to his boyfriend and whispered in his ear:

"You look happy. "

He turned around to smile at him, trying to ignore Graves' eyes shuttling back and forth between his gaze and his lips.

"I am. " he replied.

"Is it a little thanks to me? " he asked blushing.

Credence kissed him quickly, before laying a series of butterfly kisses on his forehead, cheekbones, and lips, making Percy laugh.

"It's all thanks to you. " he assured.

Percival placed his forehead against his own, tightening his grip around his fingers, as if he was afraid that all this was just a dream and that Credence would disappear.

"You have bewitched me, body and soul. " he confessed in a low voice.

"I love you, Percy. "

They stayed like this for a long time before they moved aside when Mr. and Mrs. Graves entered the room. Viviane looked at them tenderly before serving the dessert she had prepared for the occasion: a magnificent chocolate cake impeccably decorated with whipped cream and meringue. With all that he had eaten for lunch, Credence had a better understanding of Percival's interest in food. After several minutes, Mrs. Graves spoke:

"Deep down, I always knew that Percival would find again his white flower. That was written the day you decided to call him that. "

"Mommy..." Percy sighed, blushing suddenly.

"What? You were so adorable!" Viviane smiled.

"You still haven't told me why you nicknamed me that..." Credence added, cutting his piece of cake in his plate.

Percival turned towards him, looked at him with round eyes, as if the youngest had just betrayed him in front of his parents.

"What?" Viviane exclaimed. "Oh, Percy, you are unbelievable! "

"Mom, stop! " he tried, becoming increasingly red.

Mrs. Graves dismissed his protests with a wave of her hand, drinking her tea before saying:

"After the meal, I'll show you the video Credence. "

"Mom! "

Percival looked completely desperate. He passed a hand over his face and sighed loudly. Credence deliberately ignored him, really curious to know what Viviane was going to show him. (Well, him half-naked running after Percival, most certainly ...) Percy was always so enigmatic when he talked about the summer of their meeting, as if he was afraid to reveal something shameful.

"A video from that summer? " asked the younger one.

"Yes. You'll see, you're really very cute. " Viviane assured him.

She seemed really happy to be able to reveal these memories to Henrietta's son.

"My image as a tough guy is going to take a real blow," Percy grumbled.

His image as a tough guy? His reputation as a tough man, he had lost it more than 3 months ago! And he was losing it a little more each time he brought breakfast to bed at Credence, each time he kissed him to wake him up, each time he hummed a love song, each time he told Credence that he was perfect, each time he was ecstatic in front of a pet store, each time he fell asleep in front of a movie, his head resting on his boyfriend's lap. Oh God, Credence was so in love with him...

He leaned over to Percival, placed a tender kiss on his cheek before saying to him in a reassuring smile:

"You don't have to be tough for me, Percival Grave. I love you, just as you are. "

Percy smiled back at him, looking at him with a blissful expression that made his mother laugh. William also had a little giggle that he masked by pretending to cough so as not to offend his son. Then the meal ended, Percival freed the young man's thin fingers, and everyone helped Viviane to tidy and clear the table.

Later in the afternoon, they settled down in front of the television: William in his usual armchair, Viviane in hers, and Credence and Percy next to each other on the sofa. The younger one rested his head on the shoulder of his boyfriend, and Percival put his hand in his hair, laying kisses on the top of his skull at regular intervals. There, lulled by his love and the sweet smell of his lover, Credence felt invincible, happy, infinite. And it was with a smile on his lips that he looked at the video on the screen.

_The garden is bathed in sunshine, the slightest drop of water from the day before sends a glow back to the camera. It's a summer morning like so many others. The camera approaches and we see Percy, incredibly young, running through the manor park with Credence on his back. The youngest is laughing out loud._

_They are happy, young enough to be free of everything that society or life might impose on them. They are light, joyful, adorable. After a while, Percival stops running and puts Credence back on the ground. The younger one passes his skinny arms around his waist, hugs him tightly, both out of breath from running or laughing. Credence has his chin resting on Percy's belly, his face raised towards the young teenager. Percival is already tall for his age, while Credence, because of the early years of his life, is still small and frail._

_" Percy! Percy, you are the best knight in the universe!" he says._

_" Am I? Are you sure?" the other smiles, passing one hand through the brown curls._

_" Yes! You're the best! " he exclaims._

_Percy laughs before bending over to tickle the younger one. The laughter resounds again. Then there's a jump in the frame and we find ourselves a few days later. The two boys are kneeling next to the irises that have a slight pinkish tint. Credence seems to marvel at these flowers. He pulls gently on Percy's shirt before asking :_

_" Percy, what kind of flower is this? "_

_" They are irises. Do you think they're pretty? "_

_The camera moves closer. Credence sits down, nodding vigorously, with those energetic gestures typical of children. Percival smiles as the little black-haired boy says to him:_

_" I find them really beautiful. One day I'll have a whole bunch of them! "_

_Percival picks one of the irises. Credence's eyes sparkle with admiration._

_" For now, I'll just give you one. " Graves said_

_Then, delicately, he places the flower in the youngest's hair. The person holding the camera has a gentle laugh and the two children turn towards her. A huge smile appears on the face of little Jones as he screams joyfully:_

_" Look, Mrs. Graves! "_

_A new laugh is heard and the camera moves closer to get a better look at Credence's face before Viviane's voice responds:_

_" You're very cute Credence. It suits you very well. "_

_The little boy blushes before throwing himself, in a spontaneous gesture, into Percival's arms, passing his pale little arms around his neck. The older boy frowns, visibly upset that his mother is filming the scene._

_" Mom, stop with the camera, now. "_

_" You will be very happy when you can see these moments again, Percival. "_

_The image jumps again. It's evening now. We are on the terrace of the Graves. Credence is wearing only shorts, the upper part of his body revealing the scars still present on his young skin. He is lying on one of the deckchairs with Percy. His head rests on the clavicle of the eldest, who runs his hand through his brown curls while reading him a chapter from Alice in Wonderland. Credence looks at the pictures in the book with attention, listening with interest to every word of Percival. Then one of his arms wraps itself around the older one's waist and the oldest puts a distracted kiss on the top of his skull._

_The scene changes again. We are once more in the garden. Credence still doesn't have a T-shirt. He plays distractedly with a daisy while Percy reads a book on a chair next to him._

_" Percy? "_

_" White flower? "_

_" Why do you call me white flower? "_

_Percival gently closes his book, pondering the question with frowning eyebrows. Then he says in a small voice:_

_" I don't really know... I read somewhere that the name of Percival's fiancée in certain Arthurian legends was_ Blanchefleur _. In French it means : White flower"_

_Credence has a little happy laugh. He lets go of the flower he is holding and comes to lean on the right armrest of Percy's chair. Young Graves looks at him attentively while the younger one says to him :_

_" But I'm not your fiancée! "_

_Percival seems upset by the remark. He frowns a little more, his cheeks turning pink. He lowers his eyes on his hands placed on his legs before saying very softly :_

_" No, I know that... "_

_Credence stands on tiptoes to put a sonorous kiss on his cheek before walking away jumping and shouting :_

_" I want to be a white flower for the rest of my life! "_

_A radiant smile lights up the face of the eldest and Viviane's laughter can be heard again. But Percy doesn't notice her. He puts his book on the table next to him, gets up, joins Credence who continues to jump around with a smile up to his ears._

_" Really? " Percy asks._

_" Yes!" Credence exclaims, throwing himself on him with all his strength, making them both fall into the grass before bursting into laughter._

_There's a new cut. The two young boys are sleeping on one of the deckchairs. Percy holds Credence firmly against him, and the younger boy holds a small teddy in his arms that looks vaguely like an owl. William approaches before laying a blanket over them._

_" They are adorable..." Percy's father whispers to the camera._

_" Yes," answers Viviane's voice. " And Credence never has nightmares when they sleep like that... "_

_We can still see them sleeping against each other for a few moments before the image changes. It is the end of the day, Credence is standing on a small wall, the one at the entrance of the property. He is wearing only underpants and has obviously been playing like this all day, judging by the traces of earth and grass on his pale skin. The camera approaches him as he opens his arms wide and shouts:_

_" Percy! Percy, catch me! "_

_Then he jumps and Percival catches him, exclaiming:_

_" I've got you! I've got you! "_

_The little boy with the black curls passes his arms around his neck and his legs around his waist laughing. Percy is having a hard time stabilizing himself, but he doesn't put him down. The youngest boy's joyful voice says:_

_" Do I weigh heavy? "_

_" No, you're lighter than a cloud!" Percy smiles at him._

_After a small laugh, Credence buried his face in the teenager's neck. The camera moves a little closer so that it can record the youngest, who asks in a trembling voice:_

_" You'll always catch me, won't you? "_

_Percy puts him down on the floor, lays a kiss on his forehead and then pushes him towards the house, saying:_

_" Always! Now go get a T-shirt on before you catch a cold! "_

_Credence runs away towards the building just as Percival looks up at the camera. He sighs loudly, frowning, before saying to his mother in an angry tone:_

_" Mom, stop recording! "_

_The camera turns to film the floor. All we hear is Viviane grumbling "Oh, what a killjoy! "before the image jumps. The sun is high in the sky, it seems to be very hot. We are still in the Graves garden. Credence runs around, laughing out loud as Percy chases him with a T-shirt in his hands._

_" Credence, you have to put on a T-shirt, you're going to get sunburned! " the oldest insists_

_Credence turns to him and runs in his direction and before Percy can react, he throws himself on top of him, rolling them both in the grass. He laughs again, kisses Percival on the cheek before running away and shouting :_

_" No, I'm free! Percy, I love you, I wish you'd never go to boarding school! "_

_The camera lowers to the ground and before the scene changes, we simply hear Percival's moving voice respond:_

_" I love you too, white flower. "_

_The set is still as sunny as ever, but the atmosphere is much sadder. It is a few days before Percy's departure for the boarding school. A few days before he disappears from Credence's life. Credence goes on a trip to Los Angeles with Henrietta and Charles and he has to say goodbye to Percival. The older one is on his knees and he is holding young Jones in his arms. Credence cries his eyes out, his little hands clutching Percy's shirt as Percy tells him that everything will be all right, stroking his back._

_Credence moves away, his cheeks wet with tears, his eyes swollen. Percival clears the black curls from his forehead. The youngest puts his hands on his shoulders, his eyes anchored in those of the teenager while he asks in a serious and slightly plaintive tone:_

_" You'll come back for me, won't you? "_

_" Of course, white flower. " Percy smiles_

_" You promise? " he insists, on the verge of tears again, his lower lip trembling dangerously._

_Percival frames his face with his hands, wiping his cheeks with his thumbs before closing his eyes, placing his forehead against the little boy's and saying :_

_" I swear it. "_

And 18 years later, he had kept his word. Because it had always been Credence, because it was the evidence, and despite all the trials and tribulations of their lives, they had finally come back to each other. Deep down, Henrietta and Viviane had been right to believe that a romance between their sons was possible. Percival Grave was definitely the man of his dreams, the love of his life, his future. And huddled against him, holding back his tears of emotion with difficulty, Credence thought that from today on, he would never leave Graves again. It was at that very moment that he realized that he was happier than he had ever been in his entire life and that no one in the world would be able to take that moment of pure happiness away from him. He had gotten his life back together, he and Graves were rebuilding themselves, they had sent away all the assholes (one in particular) who hadn't been able to respect or love them.

When Credence would come home tonight, he would open, with a smile on his face, the new diary that Percy had given him for Christmas, to write in capital letters: _This is where it all begins._

**THE BEGINNING**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading ! Here it is, it's the end ^^ Or rather the beginning ^^ I hope you liked this story ! Feel free to leave a comment, kisses!


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